Jack Monroe #523 Everything she does is pointless busywork that solves nothing

[Dr.CM]

Was this when she was in her "Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells" era? Writing cringey middle-aged letters to the local rag about FOULING DOGS and needing more bobbies on the beat instead of iPads in hospitals. bleeping melt.

Unsure, it was a part of her erm... 'poetry' about disaffected youth taking ecstacy and being raided by police horses or some incomprehensible nonsense.

Her writing is the linguistic equivalent of slopping tinned peaches into a sachet of savoury rice.

 

[ChocolateMuffin]

@ForgettyBetty

TD responses on greenbelt statement

 

[Dr.CM]

Yes. It’s also one of a pair that

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Bit gauche, darling.

 

[HONK!]

Yes. It’s also one of a pair that

Spoiler: WARNED

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Quite amazing, really, considering she lost the complete use of her hands in her late twenties. Or...maybe...she was...

Jimmy, where are you? You're nailness is needed.

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

This bit in that Greenbelt statement:

For many, she is a heroic anti-poverty campaigner, as evidenced by her recent awards. In October, she won the 2022 Food Hero at the Observer Food Monthly Awards, and a couple of weeks ago she was named The Grocer’s Hero of the Year.

That’s all they can find to praise her for? She won a couple of awards voted for by a random number of middle class people? Talk about being damned by faint praise. And ‘a couple of weeks ago’ was actually December. Like six months ago.

And welcome new frauen! May a chaos be granted to you soon

 

[Tabitha D]

I mean, I’m not going to put myself up as an authority on Bukowski, but I have (I think) almost every book he’s written, I have recordings of spoken pieces he’s done, etc. I’ve watched countless documentaries on him etc. my memory is tit, so I wouldn’t say he hasn’t said it, but I’m not sure he has. I haven’t memorised every one of his words.
Id be sure she probably hasn’t even read Post Office.

There is a website somewhere of Bukowski experts (a Bukowski society or something) which I came across - they were debating this exact quote and the consensus was that it wasn’t a quote of his. In fact they concluded it was Kinky Friedman.
Typical Jack though. I’d be surprised if she’s actually read any Bukowski, it’s just for appearance.
---

The Trussel Trust said they will bring along some genuine poors. So that's alright then.

Big of them to let some actual Poors in to gaze at the big lights and fancy people. What a treat for them.

 

[Landslide]

Frauen. After many many gruelling months of grunking I have finally been granted entry to your ranks. I feel like I know you all. Thank you all for the endless entertainment. I wish I’d found you all in lockdown. I have no idea how I got here. I think it was awfully molly. Jack was never really on my radar except as the exact figure she portrays herself as and the KH blah. Then I somehow saw the AM account and have been gobsmacked ever since. What a complete GRIFTING BELL END.

 

[frankychester]

Totally agree! It’s really hard to articulate clearly, but although I do believe she may have it, I feel instinctively that there is also a weird layer of falseness to how she presents it and frames it and that makes it feel very confusing.

It’s not like someone saying ‘I ducked up because of X’, it’s more like there’s an inherent dishonesty/lack of humility that uses it as an excuse to further itself, which is what people are reacting to?

She probably is on the ADHD spectrum but it's the way she so gleefully employs it to explain away tit behaviour that really sticks in my craw.

 

[ChocolateMuffin]

God Save Trifle Defender

 

[RandomFishOils]

Oh that's another thing. SOME people might say that she bought it as an "investment". Cool. Point me at a pov or working class wage earner (or even middle class wage earner!) who has a spare £7k they can sink into an "investment". Go on. I'll wait.

Ahhhh, but aren’t all of her reckless designer purchases passed off as “investments”? If someone can point me to this mysterious exchange where beaten up Mulberry bags with broken straps and sweat-stained leather leggings sell for more than they were originally purchased, I’d be most grateful. (Actually, you can keep any info about the sale of sweaty leggings to yourself. Ewwww.)

 

[Shimmering]

The Trussel Trust said they will bring along some genuine poors. So that's alright then.

Thread title

 

[DinosaurSenior]

@Landslide ... Your username . I love it!

 

[CabalofBolorneaise]

I really hope trifle defender gets 81 more followers to get her to 10k so she can be unsquigged.

I thought if they were a public figure they could be unsquigged even below that? She’s a journalist, surely she fits now?

I know earlier when she wasn’t naming JM we kept squigging out of respect for her desire for privacy but the ship has rather sailed on that now!

 

[frankychester]

Unsure, it was a part of her erm... 'poetry' about disaffected youth taking ecstacy and being raided by police horses or some incomprehensible nonsense.

Jack and Jill
took a pill
that they thought would take them to heaven

Now they're lying comatose
in a hospital built by Nye Bevan
Vote Labour!

 

[mchops]

WoW, trifle going full on. Go for it, the evidence is collated here.

 

[HONK!]

It’s so incomprehensible, especially as they’ve just barred someone for dodgy dealings. I wonder how many people’ll be put off attending as it just makes them seem like corrupt sycophants. I wonder if they hope the notoriety will attract sales.

I just want to tell you how much I love your username. I was out with a pal yesterday and the conversation went from guinea pigs to capybaras. I mentioned the time I was in Southend... Leon... Peru...and met a beautiful capybara. Happily trotting along a path, giving it all that with a social media reality unknown. An absolute royal beast. They were stunning.

One of the most content creatures ever, but would be much improved by the imbibition of a kombucha 124345431551515424213151% cocktail, dripping in stonewashed denim and a Clairol home kit.

I don't think I'm saying much of worth, certainly nothing important, so I will say this because it's eternally relevant:

guest is a bleep.

She truly is.

Big hugs to the Frauen, the Heron, the Lurkers and the bewildered. X

 

[Landslide]

@Landslide ... Your username . I love it!

Felt it was important to pay homage to Guests astounding rendition. As ever, thanks for all you do Jack

 

[I'm not actually here]

To the frauen who recommended scamanda.... Respect.

If only HMRC could be arsed. Grrr. I am going to report her again in the morn, in person.

 

[DinosaurSenior]

The golfer Rory McIlroy has always reminded me of a capybara, or a koala.

 

[catgoldo]

For new Frauen - Trifle Defender is a food writer and frequent Jack critic, and we love her. She has potentially known JM (at least online) for years and is also a friend of Nigella and other known foodie people. She got involved a while back when the jubilee trifle thing was going on and Jack tore into the winning trifle entry, using JackMaths to create a low cost version. Trifle Defender defended the winning trifle and thus was reborn as TD.

First name is shared with the former Scottish minister who is also a fish and potentially involved in fishy things. Second name is a person who makes flour.