Jack Monroe #463 Is she on the game for Farrow & Ball?

[OwlRightsReserved]

It’s not poor memory that accounts for this

View attachment 1886634
She can’t play the piano as that horrific one fingered bashing of New England showed. So her mum didn’t teach her to play

This is not about people’s recollections differing, it’s just her making tit up

Everything she does to do with pianos is my aneurysm.

This is the worst way of learning. It encourages you to look for the letters as opposed to understanding how notes relate to one another - octaves, fifths, diminished etc., all of which help you to understand the shape of a piece of music, and as your spatial awareness develops, you come to understand how to move around the keys without needing to look for the notes you want.

She just loves setting him up to fail.

 

[The carlin]

Geez is Billy Bragg another narc? I’ve never heard that song before so just had a listen and the idea that the song is even good or would sound good on a piano is laughable. Political message is one thing but it’s just basic tit musically.

Not sure about the narc, but definitely has a few issues in kind to our pov princess. I've said before OH and his mate went to a recent gig of his and left half way thru. Cos all he did was whinge the nobody understands me, media hate me, noone is as caring and thoughtful about society as him, etc, etc. They just went duck off mate and went to the pub

 

[MancBee]

Reminds me of this joke .

Spoiler: rude joke

Yorkshire man goes into a cafe in the redlight district of Amsterdam, sees the menu board , "Blow Job €5 , Hand Job €4 , Ham sandwich €2 . He ask's the attractive lady behind the counter "Are you the lass that gives the hand jobs, "yes " she replied, "well wash your hands, I want a ham sandwich"

This reminds me of the google streetview of one of Manchester's red light district. They captured one of the women giving a hand job, looking over her shoulder and having a drag on a fag. They blurred the faces, but not his tackle. A wag then renamed the street "Hand Job Alley"

If you google" hand job alley" the picture and story still comes up, even though google has removed it from the streetview page.

Back to Jack. Matt Gloss would surely give her paint to not give him a hand job with her filthy hands and nails.

 

[Captainmouse]

Coming from the last thread to say I am absolutely hooting at that photo with the Green & Blacks cocoa powder.

Even during the bleeping photoshoot for a low-cost cooking book, she still can't resist flaunting her expensive tastes...absolutely pathetic.

And the spenny jam. What a waste of ingredients

 

[noweverythingsucks]

It’s not poor memory that accounts for this

View attachment 1886634
She can’t play the piano as that horrific one fingered bashing of New England showed. So her mum didn’t teach her to play

This is not about people’s recollections differing, it’s just her making tit up

Didn't she just say she taught herself from books so she could teach him?

 

[CarmenGhia]

Everything she does to do with pianos is my aneurysm.

This is the worst way of learning. It encourages you to look for the letters as opposed to understanding how notes relate to one another - octaves, fifths, diminished etc., all of which help you to understand the shape of a piece of music, and as your spatial awareness develops, you come to understand how to move around the keys without needing to look for the notes you want.

She just loves setting him up to fail.

You're not meant to look at your hands when you play, you're meant to look at the music. This is how blind people are capable of playing the piano, should they wish to learn, to a high level, with only adjustments to how they learn the music itself.

The gun pic was new to me as well. She looked like she was cosplaying the Unabomber.

To own an artillery piece like that which is capable of being fired, you'd have to be a licensed armourer with extensive police and medical checks and experience with guns. You'd still not be allowed to fire it in the street though. I doubt a house with foster children coming in and out of it, some of them troubled, would be considered a suitable place to house an armoury.

 

[Mrs Peel]

If you are going to put stickers on a piano (bad idea because you come to rely on them) you would put them on the white keys. Once someone has mastered C Major (all white) there would be no need to mark the black keys with sharp or flat because the person would know where they are on the keyboard due to the positioning in between white keys. Flat: left. Sharp: right.

She put them on the black keys to look like she was more 'advanced', but they haven't helped judging by her version of New England.

Edit: Just noticed that this has been covered already!

 

[itsnotmereally]

Offs!! Too early
Can’t we have ‘wow you’re salty though’ as a you know what

Unlike her cooking!

 

[Foxvint]

Not sure about the narc, but definitely has a few issues in kind to our pov princess. I've said before OH and his mate went to a recent gig of his and left half way thru. Cos all he did was whinge the nobody understands me, media hate me, noone is as caring and thoughtful about society as him, etc, etc. They just went duck off mate and went to the pub

He's always bollocking women who recognise women as a distinct sex class not as an identity aswell. A socialist who denies material reality.

 

[CarmenGhia]

He's always bollocking women who recognise women as a distinct sex class not as an identity aswell. A socialist who denies material reality.

He's utterly insufferable now. I loved the lyrics to his earlier songs but I can't even listen to them now without getting cross.

 

[ForgettyBetty]

40 years ago, Billy Bragg was whining a not very catchy song. I have paid no attention to him since. Fun to know he's still whining not very catchy songs.
I probably won't be around in another few decades to see if Jack is still whining not very truthful pov stories, I hand that baton to the young frauen

 

[SamFoxStuckinaCloak]

Do you think she’s ever met any WC people. Prince Lumpy comes from a very WC background and did do music, but it was all through school.
I know there are exceptions but generally WC aren’t driving their kids to ballet and music. My child’s music teachers almost exclusively taught private school children.

You can be WC and into the arts, just not necessarily having private lessons and stuff. I was massively into theatre as a kid, no idea where it came from and no way to get into it- so my mum found a little weekly drama group that met in an old church hall for like a pound a week. My Old Harold also from a WC (and criminal) family- used to be in a band. No arts background at all but was always obsessed with music. He was self taught and in bands from a really young age. It does happen- it’s just hard to a) have private lessons outside of school and b) make a career out of it.

 

[SendReceive]

Everything she does to do with pianos is my aneurysm.

This is the worst way of learning. It encourages you to look for the letters as opposed to understanding how notes relate to one another - octaves, fifths, diminished etc., all of which help you to understand the shape of a piece of music, and as your spatial awareness develops, you come to understand how to move around the keys without needing to look for the notes you want.

She just loves setting him up to fail.

/ At my daughter’s school a term’s worth of guitar lessons, once a week, by a qualified teacher, costs around £80.

Makes you think when compared to the cost of a Cotswold doesn’t it?

 

[noweverythingsucks]

Not sure how to get the video from Twitter, but here's a link to the tweet:


Not sure I see any stickers on the keys in that...

If she's the one teaching him, then when why is she surprised? Also, it doesn't particularly sound like what she says it is. And what self-respecting emo in the early 00s would have admitted to that being a favourite song? Everyone was too desperate not to look like a poser.

Also, LOL at the desperate squigs. I particularly like this one

 

[Lucky Escape]

You're not meant to look at your hands when you play, you're meant to look at the music. This is how blind people are capable of playing the piano, should they wish to learn, to a high level, with only adjustments to how they learn the music itself.

The gun pic was new to me as well. She looked like she was cosplaying the Unabomber.

To own an artillery piece like that which is capable of being fired, you'd have to be a licensed armourer with extensive police and medical checks and experience with guns. You'd still not be allowed to fire it in the street though. I doubt a house with foster children coming in and out of it, some of them troubled, would be considered a suitable place to house an armoury.

Big Dave is Executive Chair of the "Shoeburyness and South Essex Branch Royal Artillery Association (Est. 1929)", so may well have the appropriate permissions - but as you say, he still wouldn't be allowed to fire it on a residential street!

Having his "clinically unable to lie" daughter broadcast that he'd done so to more than half a million people on twitter must have caused him a huge amount of embarrassment at the very least.

Does anyone remember how long it took for that tweet to have been deleted?

ETA: Deleted later that day - sadly no timestamps: https://tattle.life/threads/jack-monroe-319-belle-du-poor.30562/post-10111607

 

[HaveTinCanRattle]

I've long suspected that Musical Jack was my aneurysm, but it's now been officially diagnosed by my window cleaner.

I can't remember who posted the video of SB picking out the tune on the pianoforte keyboard (was it dear @Lucky Escape ?). In any event, given the video also captures ~the smoking nun~, I believe you have unlocked a new level in whatever this is.

I started with my piano teacher when I was four and she used to phone on my birthday each year and ask for me. She would then play the most elaborate version of Happy Birthday down the receiver. She didn't call on my 15th birthday and it turned out she had DIED. Insert all the watermelons here.

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

He's always bollocking women who recognise women as a distinct sex class not as an identity aswell. A socialist who denies material reality.

And he sold his house for a £2.5m profit to a bloke who works at Goldman Sachs and has a nepo baby Jack Valero.

Can‘t stand him.

 

[Edie Po]

I think the problem is he’s been so obviously inaccurate about a few (mostly little) bits, and it was the same with the interview, that people are questioning the things that genuinely fall into “recollections may vary”. I have the same question about his book as I do about Jack’s for different reasons, where on earth were the editors to say “Hang on you weren’t at school when the Queen Mother died and the press will leap on that, so what are you mixing this up with?”

It’s like the polar opposite of Jack where the general public seem perfectly happy for her to tell massive implausible lies and still believe all the little things as well. But it’s harder to prove her tales about her childhood of course, she wasn’t followed around by the press.

He's just made shite up.. stuck a bit of Oedipus Complex in.. talked to the moon/bin.
Been off his tits since christ knows... actually he should of married ,Jack..they'd of been brilliant together.
Elevenafing each other morning/noon & night.

 

[Dogmuck]

OK, way behind still but wany to mention the curtain pictures. I think the ones from pic three are the same ones from pic one. The same neutral linen pattern ones but with voiles scrunched in the tie back with them.

View attachment 1887028View attachment 1887031View attachment 1887034
I could be wrong, but if that's the case then the timeline of the pics might not be as straight as she would have us believe

I must protest dear heart, I have been forensic in my research, almost earning myself an honorary doctorate in curtains from the University of nowhere. I believe that these curtains are quite possibly the same curtains that were in Jacks bedroom before she did that amazing makeover for SB. These

A close up of these can be seen here

I think we can see them better in the Content photo in this shot

And for a more forensic detail

Although I must confess it’s possible that they are two similar but separate sets - however, the window dressing with Coops in shot are not a brocade/damask floral (possibly Laura Ashley Josette according to Google reverse imagery) style like the ones above but are very much a linea Mayan/Inka style pattern. See forensics I would also like to point out that they do not seem to hang like curtains and are possibly Roman blinds or they are so new they still have the creases in from packaging and old interior design expert Ms M hasn’t ironed them
#curtaintruther

I rest my case

 

[PummelMyPumble]

Has she never had her dusty crumpet buttered on the stairs, in the shower, or in view of the (many) kitchen appliances? In the garden? You can still get to it on the sofa. She's *so* boring. Missionary all the way, lights out, no talking, stay on your side of the measured line on the mattress afterwards. WARNED!

Imagine the honk sounds that come out of her, though. (Soz.)