Best me rail EVER!View attachment 1793588
Pineapples on a Jack thread is so fitting for me. As I hate them. They are misleading and watching them grow for three years (obviously sped up in a Timelapse) makes me cringe and rage. I feel conned by every pineapple related memory I have.
I believed for 24 years that they grew on trees. Like the same trees coconuts grow on (palm?) but with pineapples there instead of coconuts.
I also believed they were growing in Hawaii.
WHY is it called a Hawaiian pizza? That’s ham and pineapple. last time I checked ham isn’t unique to hawaii, So I assumed the pineapple was.
also, in an episode of Sabrina the teenage witch I remember from being a child, Sabrina turns Libby into a pineapple and when she comes back she says “you sent me somewhere, is was small and smelled like Hawaii”.
I also have a memory of one of my sims, on the sims castaway, climbing a tree that looked like a coconut tree and coming back down with a pineapple, but I may be remembering incorrectly on that one. WARNED.
The outside of them literally looks like it goes with the bark on a palm tree. It matches. It would look right there. Where is does not look right, is growing out of the bleeping ground somewhere in Africa (or anywhere else if it’s in the ground). Literally, rows of them, in a field. I was horrified when I learned this. I can’t even describe the feeling I got when I saw pictures of them growing out of the ground. I cannot look at them anymore. I’ve never recovered. My friends think my reactions to them are hilarious, one particular friend absolutely dies laughing. She sent me a video of someone who had made Pinecone jam with little pinecones hoping to recreate some of my reactions to pineapples earlier, but it didn’t bother me I just thought it was weird.
Jack Monroe #437 C U Next Wednesday
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Best me rail EVER!
Just woken up. Am I having a pineapply dream?
I was going to go back to sleep but finding a timelapse of pineapples growing seems more important all of a sudden.
Slopbot is truly bringing the gifts that keep giving, we are so blessed.
I was going to go back to sleep but finding a timelapse of pineapples growing seems more important all of a sudden.
Slopbot is truly bringing the gifts that keep giving, we are so blessed.
BIB for thread title
I reckon she won’t be able to do her big show-off tree this year, due to “moving” but she will get out some bits of decorations and do a flat lay photo of them, or list every bleeping fake bird and bauble she owns, that she would put on her tree, despite absolutely nobody asking.
Ooh yes. I'll be up to do some crafty thrifty tips
Pineapples always put me in mind of the Panamanian dictator Manuel Noriega. When he was deposed/captured by the US the good people of Panama celebrated in the streets with whole pineapples on sticks. The pineapples were a reference to Noriega's badly pock-marked acne scarred skin. Honestly, I can't remember where I put my sewing kit but I remember this from over 30 years ago.
I got a garden hose!! I can't wait to make more puddles to hide spenny stuff in.
Any one of the animals, as long as it’s got it’s snout in the trough.
Don’t forget to leave it outside though for the foxes to eat a la LJC. They love a hose snack.
I’ve eaten my parmentier potatoes, passed them off as my own creation as is traditional.
Thankyou Slopbot and Traumy for all you do and hope the major incident gets sorted pdq x
The innkeeper.
Joseph: We’re in desperate need of a room, a bed for my heavily pregnant wife. We have travelled painstakingly for many an hour. Mary and I beg of you, can you let us in?
Monroe: SHAN’T
Thankspaceyou for my tacky motivational quote slopbot. I will hang it in my downstairs loo. Not an Emin though. Disappointed.
SupercalifragilisticexpialiJ1gcious
Thank you, kind slopbot 
Never has a gift been so useful yet so loaded with potential peril. I’ll be sure to keep it well away from the sieves.
Never has a gift been so useful yet so loaded with potential peril. I’ll be sure to keep it well away from the sieves.
When these threads throw a curveball, they are hilarious! I shall never again look at pineapples in the same way 
ETA I got a tin of delmonte mandarins. Curry tonight for me
ETA I got a tin of delmonte mandarins. Curry tonight for me
This is like Christmas morning, reaching into the stocking. Now I can turn all my food into slop, yay!
If someone else gets the Ooni pizza oven I will beraging really happy for them.
If someone else gets the Ooni pizza oven I will be
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Thank you Slopbot! very posh and expensive -
(You are so clever and creative Traumy S!)
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Yay, I finally found the Slopbot link and I got….whatever the hell this is
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Baby Slopbot has just absolutely finished me off. 10/10 would grunk again.
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