Jack Monroe #429 Jack, please stop pretending to have friends. It's embarrassing for all of us.

[Geetbo]

Why the duck did she bother to wear the karen wig for the cover of Grifty Kitchen if she was just gonna chop all her hair off anyway?

At least we know where to find Jack for the next week or so, she’ll be stood outside the tiny Turkish barbers with her fanny pressed against the glass.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Looool who needs ninnies with fans like this, she’d have been absolutely bleeping fewmin over this - she’s given that photo the FaceTune treatment yet still can’t hide just how prematurely/excessively aged and damaged her skin is.

 

[Jemadah]

Why the duck did she bother to wear the karen wig for the cover of Grifty Kitchen if she was just gonna chop all her hair off anyway?

Suspect it was a typo all those months ago - not "stunt hair" but bleep hair.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Think the reflection in her eyes could be a selfie light.

 

[DavidZero]

Just a quick question. Does she think she invented Jollof Rice and That Man stole it from her?

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

Just a quick question. Does she think she invented Jollof Rice and That Man stole it from her?

No, she’s comparing Jamie making a tin/budget programme to the cultural appropriation he was accused of for making a (tit) jollof: https://amp.theguardian.com/world/2016/aug/22/world-jollof-day-jamies-oliver-rice-scandals

In other words, she’s saying that her work has been colonised. Jamie oppressor; Jack oppressed.

Because, of course, Jack has never in her career bastardised the cuisine of another country.

 

[zetta buttons]

Unable to quote from or copy from previous thread, but a quick shout out to @colouredlines for providing evidence to show that Jack was in fact overjoyed during her previous moves. Things can get forgotten/buried in our mitherings and actually seeing that she alters her past in this way when we have an inkling that she’s done it is reassuring. Thank you.

Spoiler: Horrid filtered image

Once again, seeing Jack with the cheekbones, sharp chin and claims of “poor me” has done me no favours. I bleeping hate it when she does this. Entirely on me for believing that she actually looks like this and that she is losing weight quickly due to the stress of AM/DM tit. If anyone else is affected too, then I am sending you thoughts. I can’t articulate anything else really right now.

 

[Cookiecookie]

Am off to the opticians later. Will be sure to transcribe our small talk

Just don't go annoying them, or you might end up with Rose West specs like Jack!

There's so many, far superior to any of Jack's, recipe books for children out there. From ones for toddlers, to off to uni big kids. Why would you even think of Jack?

 

[Vinbisha]

I go to the fade shop near me for my undercut. I get a proper fade AND they put lines in it cos I think I'm fancy. It costs...£8!
And it doesn't look like Content chewed it in the night (sorry Kings and Queens, but that is not a good cut, but congrats on all the taciturn sexiness I guess).

 

[BurgerLaBill]

bleeping hell, she looks post sesh in that new undercut picture. Rough as, facetune or not. Human snow plough.

 

[Country Bumpkin]

Who does she think she's kidding, talking about 'friends'. And that nose! Will soon have it's own post code. Her tweets are constant nonsense. What a tit

 

[Stormageddon]

Moving boxes in the background

View attachment 1742218

She’s coloured in shadows under her eyes to look more exhausted and gaunt and vulnerable hasn’t she? Christ what a dick. At least she laid off the sparkly Urban Decay this time.

 

[Pocahontas]

But the silent handsome Turkish barber called her thicc hair ‘beautiful’ while he wept and cut her hair like a brave gentleman foreigner - and she wept for his humility and understanding in this strange new multicultural world that only she had the intelligence to navigate.

 

[zetta buttons]

She’s still wearing her pov grey jumper under her toasty shirt.

#cantaffordheating
#canaffordlotsofbrandnewmovingboxes
#smolwaifpixieissothinshefeelsthecoldmorethananyone

 

[Aquamarina]

She’s coloured in shadows under her eyes to look more exhausted and gaunt and vulnerable hasn’t she? Christ what a dick. At least she laid off the sparkly Urban Decay this time.

She also looks like she’s added some contour to her cheekbones to enhance her ‘gauntness.’ She really is despicable with the sadfishing and I’m constantly amazed that people are still falling for her bullshit.

 

[NellieBoo]

She’s coloured in shadows under her eyes to look more exhausted and gaunt and vulnerable hasn’t she? Christ what a dick. At least she laid off the sparkly Urban Decay this time.

Yes, unless she's using a filter. She's shaded her face too. You can see it .

 

[Fleasyweezy]

She’s coloured in shadows under her eyes to look more exhausted and gaunt and vulnerable hasn’t she? Christ what a dick. At least she laid off the sparkly Urban Decay this time.

Either that or her eyes are migrating to the back of her head

 

[colouredlines]

Meanwhile, in a Turkish cafe somewhere in Southend...

So this woman came in. She was obviously English, but she kept banging on about being Greek and how one of her best mates is Turkish and all this tit. She was so annoying that I gave her the worst haircut I've ever done...and the stupid twit didn't even realise. She asked if I was single and threatened to come back with a plate of homemade baklava to say thanks. I've asked Deniz to keep a lookout so we can close in a hurry if we need to. Worst of all, the entire shop still stinks of anchovies...

 

[FlirtyThirty]

Yes, unless she's using a filter. She's shaded her face too. You can see it .

And she’s got a real disease now I can see it. Pinocchioitis. Nose getting longer every day.

 

[zetta buttons]

I really wish Jack wouldn’t throw terms like “dopamine fuzzy ” around like she knows what it means.

It’s like when people say eat bananas to increase your serotonin levels.

She knows F all about dopamine. It’s the mother of neurotransmitters and to understand it would take slightly more than 2 honorary degrees.

People like Jack think they understand Psychology because idiots on SM love chatting tit about it. It’s a science just like bleeping Chemistry and people don’t chat tit about that.