Back when JM was on the lesbian message board and we met her, before she had her son, maybe 13 years ago, she said she was doing some modelling with a bloke who was a friend, she posted some pics, the ones I remember were in mens suits and wedding dresses. None of us thought it was real modelling, more to help her mate. But she shared pics of course.
Jack Monroe #411 More flounces than an 80s wedding dress.
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Christ, I think I'd give my business partner a heart attack!! He's used to seeing me in jeans and a hoodie or a boiler suit!
That hair is worse than when Ol’ Bridge went on a mini break in Daniel Cleaver’s convertible on a windy day, and she did it deliberately?!
Also getting her kid to take pics of her posing in her bra? Who is she, Pound Shop Liz Hurley?!
Speaking as a 5ft 10 and F cup frau who is overweight...
Someone who is a good 8 inches shorter than me with a body frame of a smol pixie couldn't carry a DD let alone an E cup without being significantly top heavy.
My height and frame can 'carry off' my boob size. Someone of Jack's size couldn't. She'd be constantly hunched over with shadows over her shoes.
Jack has repeatedly insisted she 'never wears a bra' except when she is photographed wearing a bra.
Apologies for the boob talk. I don't like to comment on her appearance normally, but just wanted to point out that her bra size is another one of her pointless and unnecessary lies she tells for drama llama purposes.
That's the very same one. They also snarked this banger at someone and it really made me think, sunshine.Is that the sameusing a phrase beloved of Jack and her
Because I’ve noticed that one <cough> who has also snarked at Molly sooooo… bit suss.
I also remember her saying it was Allegra that said that, and that was from before I was that interested in her but it always stuck in my head, then once again she changed her story
' it was £45 from the local auction house' is the new muddy puddle for sideboards.
Shameless
Likely to be for SBs dad's early days portfolio, which step mum has done quite a bit of work for since.
For new arrivals....SBs dad is a semi pro photographer. Jack also identifies as a photographer.
I read that as wholesome growler and this is how I shall refer to it from now on...whoops!growler sounds simultaneously wholesome and filthy
Hi you NEFARIOUS BASTARDS. it’s ME. I’ve hacked into FrankReagan’s account as I’m a computer whiz. Did it on my Nokia after I finished my last Snake game.
As you know, I dyed all my clothes black. One day, you upset me so much that I put my new once-red Versace (found in a puddle) dress in my main knife drawer. I know you’re very jealous of that drawer you BASTARDS. Anyway the knives ATTACKED my dress and ripped it to shreds down one side. Like my HEART. So as I am a THRIFTY GENIUS I put safety pins on it to hold it together and it was a SENSATION. Of course the evil middle-class media photoshopped Liz Hurley on to all the pictures. I dumped Hugh Grant after that. I miss his night burgers.
Thankyou.
Jack.
'Perm'?
No but Badger will
Imagine trying to explain why you're shopping online for a saggy grey sports bra!
It can never happen because there is no possible way for all the versions of Jack to be incorporated into one 'story'.
Preposterous Tales In The Life Of Jack Monroe.
I’m 5’2.394827392, a size 8-10 and a 30FF. The band is a tad tight and the fucker is shipped off as soon as soon as I’m home. BoB saved me.
Sorry to any Fraus who have read this, but I came across it whilst searching Cack and Leggy, and it’s the most vomiting inducing thing I’ve ever read.
SEVEN YEARS LATER AND SHE STILL AINT TWATTED OUT. As for the last sentence. Eww.
How are they absent parents if they see them regularly and all hang out together? What does that make my kids other biological progenitor, who hasn’t been around for 7 years then, if a few days makes them absent? And yes hun, I’m sure they loved hanging out with you and you didn’t rub Allegra’s wealth in their faces as if it were your own.
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New girlfriend and step daughter? How the duck does that work then?
We chat to 'A Girl Called Jack' author Jack Monroe • Northern Life
When Karen the editor asked if I fancied interviewing Jack Monroe for this issue I was whooping and a-cheering and telling everyone from the mums...
northernlifemagazine.co.uk
Would it be possible to have The Story Of Jack According to The Guardian and then ditto According to Sainsburys/ her twitter 2013 story/ insta as of 2018 etc? Like a Jack Testaments, Bible style (other religions are available, not all on a Friday or Saturday though if you're on a grunk)
Do all her stories add up on all her Guardian articles but vary in other publications or are they contradictory within The Guardian I.e. does she at least keep her story straight for individual publications and we only see deviations when she swaps to a different newspaper etc?
Good grief. Two, in one paragraph
Attachments
Lie alert. Steaming ‘vintage’ wedding dresses isn’t advisable bridal fraus. (all eras and fabrics are of course, interchangeable)
I was thinking how Jack's life story would be unfilmable, like "the life and opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentlemen", and when I googled it... THIS is one of the main characters.... 
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