Jack Monroe #395 That’s not my fanny

[heretoreaditall2019]

The bit where she says boulevard is my fav

 

[Hollaaa]

It’s had 5,845 views and I think 5,800 are me as I’m in disbelief!

Please don't do this to your poor ears.

 

[Dogmuck]

Anyone who thinks they can’t watch it, trust me-you have to see it to believe it. And hear it. She has truly surpassed the most cringeworthy thing you’ve ever seen in your life by a country mile.
The faux American singing voice. The head shaking defiance. Oh god it’s just priceless on so many levels

I was just coming on to say this. After my intial shock I listed again…it’s actually hilarious, especially post canals comments. Listen to it, I implore you, it’s short and she doesn’t even sniff or mention her poverty once.

Who’s bathroom is that and has she got her phone stuck on black and white?

 

[Russian Doll]

Interrupting my forensic gruking because she has released her “in a bathroom, 2 phones“ singing video. If you listen softly, gently, you can hear the post nasal drip.

 

[Brian Butterfield]

If I crash, I'm sending you the bill, Jack.

 

[tattybrogan]

Oh my god that 'singing'. My very kind, happy 9 year old just asked me: 'what is that?!' while I was listening. And he never comments on any of the rubbish I watch. JeezO. How long do we think this will stay up?

 

[Emmapism]

I lasted 30 seconds before the cringe wave overtook me and I couldn't take anymore.

 

[BlendedSlop]

I actually can't believe this has made me want to go and watch her Landslide rendition as a palate cleanser. It is THAT bad.

 

[Hollaaa]

I was just coming on to say this. After my intial shock I listed again…it’s actually hilarious, especially post canals comments. Listen to it, I implore you, it’s short and she doesn’t even sniff or mention her poverty once.

Who’s bathroom is that and has she got her phone stuck on black and white?

I think it's the piglet place. She should be banned from there for life.

 

[blurstoftimes]

omg omg i’m actually hyperventilating how is this real life

 

[colouredlines]

OK I caved.

duck. Me.

The forced attempted raspiness to "prove" the fictional laryngitis. The snarling. The moody filter. THAT LOOK TO THE CAMERA AT THE END.

I will die on this hill, this is peak Monroe Cringe. Nothing she does from now on can surpass this.

The filter is my favourite thing, because it means she recorded it, watched it, then thought, "Hmm something's not quite right. I appear to have been born with no sense of shame need a little hint of sepia - there, PERFECT!"

 

[Veronicaaa]

The bit where she says boulevard is my fav

Definitely the best bit. She's such an utter clown, I cannotttttttt

 

[Clovis]

Reader, the faux American accent deceased me

 

[AyiaKnacker]

There’s a Gallico character who tells amazing tales of his time at sea, and as “proof“ shows disbelievers the very piece of string he had on him at the time, carefully kept in a matchbox.

Jack’s constant inclusion of utterly irrelevant, boring detail in her lies to “prove” they’re true really reminds me of him, it’s hilarious. With such a reliable tell she can cross poker player off her list of future career paths.

I have a bedroom! I have lever arch files! I’ve specified a number! Therefore everything in the sentence is grounded in fact!

Also, how many is many? More than zero?

View attachment 1581974

This is a psychological phenomenon; liars over embroider, provide way too much info not necessarily even consciously. The truth just is. My Harold (who has not yet LEFT) does this when he plans to lie. He’s tit at it. ”I’ll say I can’t go cos I saw a dog and it broke it’s leg (tibia, right back leg)and it had golden eyes and was 2ft 1inch and I had to take it to the vet on the high street at number 6 next to greggs” and I’ll be like, just say you don’t want to go

 

[mackjonroe]

She’s singing. She’s bleeping singing on twitter. I’m View attachment 1582741

This Is the start! It’s coming, the CHAOS IS COMING. Sent husband for wine. Strap yourselves in!

 

[OhhBacon]

You absolutely must!! What the duck has just happened y’all?

Can you identify the song? Wouldn't mind listening to what it's supposed to sound like but simply can't identify it?

*Also insert Sir Matt of the Forearms 'terrible giff' here!

 

[Smeghead]

Singing Jack, what an end to the week and Friday treat. Praise Beans.

 

[Upthisweek]

Oh my gawd. Just opened Twitter on the bus with volume up loud, completely unprepared for her 'outburst'. Whole bus gave me a confused look too.

 

[Hollaaa]

Here come the QTs
Happy Friday, ninnies!

 

[Bugger13]

OK I caved.

duck. Me.

The forced attempted raspiness to "prove" the fictional laryngitis. The snarling. The moody filter. THAT LOOK TO THE CAMERA AT THE END.

I will die on this hill, this is peak Monroe Cringe. Nothing she does from now on can surpass this.

I know. I’ve actually cracked open a peroni and I’m crying. Singing Jack is my favourite. What is she THINKING? Has she lost her mind?
Surely this has to be something like she met Pete Waterman at Google and he said he can market her or something?
It’s literally beyond words and I’m praying someone has screen recorded in case she deletes