Jack Monroe #392 This is why ppl cook you on that gossip app innit

[Pixieboots]

Whoever the frau is in a previous thread who exhorted her to STOP CALLING THINGS "BITS", needless to say I concur.

It was me and I was just about to go for a reprise.

 

[Witchfinder Sargeant]

Hold on Fraus can’t we get forensic here

housemate‘s name is B—-D

Miss Anne Thrope last thread knows who Camembert man is - a local business entrepreneur.

can we establish if better half / bodyguard / housemate / best friend are the same potato-faced labourer?

Bodyguard's first initial is S.

 

[Nurseali]

check with her doctor if she's taking Naproxen and aspirin together.

Edit - coconut oil in a hot drink

To be fair I have a coffee with butter or coconut oil most days and salt . I am keto/low carb so have it to boost my fat intake. Coffee and butter/coconut oil is actually surprisingly nice.

 

[Boogs]

Oh LJC I hope she’s quiet. Can you imagine that nasal monotone voice whining saucy encouragement and sweet nothings to you mid-coitus?!
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It would almost be enough to send you running out into the night in alarm. Oh wait…

Maybe Burger La Bill is taking advantage of the fact that she is unable to speak (the thought of her nasal twang in my ear made me almost physically sick )

 

[Wooh]

It seems the smol pixie is losing followers at an alarming rate.
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Granny, not at an alarming rate, just a nice few. A tiny percentage of the whole

https://socialblade.com/twitter/user/bootstrapcook

 

[Captainmouse]

I can’t think of a job she can do. The only thing I think could work is a columnist where she whines about her life and even then she’d strop off when the subs cut her ludicrous prose

I reckon with some intense training, she might manage envelope stuffing, or box taping, but it just a might

 

[Mirtazapinejack]

She looks like Mark 'Chopper' Read in these photos.
*for anyone who doesn't know, Mark Read was an infamous Australian criminal, standover man, killer and author. He was portrayed brilliantly by Eric Bana in the 2000(?)
fillum Chopper.
Anyhoo, she looks like a gormless, PC version of Uncle Chop Chop.

Does she put those filters on herself? She's terrible with phones and editing for someone who claims to know everything there is to know about everything

 

[Helena Handbasket]

She follows a few of the mainstream high end bloggers on Insta, like bloggers with Hermès collections who are invited to Cartier events, so I can fully believe she was a Vogue reader in the early 2010s.

Yes and looking at the brands and objects she buys now it fits perfectly! Lovely big book of ads. I went to art college with a woman who made all her own outfits from bits of old jumpers -arms for leg warmers etc and I used to love finding Gucci catwalk collections that looked as if someone had seen her in the street and ripped her off.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Have to drag this through from the last thread too. Seriously, what is the grey bit??

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Maybe that circled bit means something else at Jack’s is now a bit more ‘ruly’, a bit less unruly ?! Waste not, want not and all that.

 

[Marj24]

Even SB and his mates have a group, so SB can share Jack's delicious recipes.

(Haha Jack, no one wants you in their group.)

I wonder what they made of the recent pies?

 

[ForgettyBetty]

True. It continues to grate my Spam, though.

To me, it reads like she is trying to give the impression that she will be presenting to a Google execs at an executive retreat next week. Just… no. Absolutely not.

Yes, of course she is. While not actually saying so/lying. It's what they do.

 

[Mrsoverall]

Has anyone cleverer than moi done a sex swap pic thing of him and Jack?

Edited because I started to talk about my menopause *wine

 

[RinsingHoops]

Haven’t grunked yet so sorry if already spotted, but could she be softly, gently trolling us?

 

[Helatruralhome]

Ah thank you - that’s what I thought it would be. 3000 NHS staff my arse.

I shall be giving blood at that time - with actual NHS staff - so sadly won’t be able to listen to her whispery nasal honk.

With the 3000 staff comment I just realised that Jack does her numbers and accounting reverse Enron-style...

 

[Nonah]

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Not quite what it's for, Jack.

TCO is the only Patreon I’m subscribed to

 

[Thank(space)you]

I cannot BELIEVE the audacity she has in even mentioning the word Patreon after what she’s not done

BIB, fixed it for you

 

[5Alive]

check with her doctor if she's taking Naproxen and aspirin together.

Edit - coconut oil in a hot drink

To be fair I have a coffee with butter or coconut oil most days and salt . I am keto/low carb so have it to boost my fat intake. Coffee and butter/coconut oil is actually surprisingly nice.

Coffee and butter is a big thing in Malaysian Borneo - fantastic strong dark coffee, so thick you can stand your spoon in it with a big dollop of butter.

 

[SpudYouHate]

Something about her saying she’s a ‘big sister’ to this young black boy just doesn’t sit right with me lol. I presume he is a child fostered by her parents, in which case she’s one of their long moved out adult children and it’s not like she would have been around to be a big sister to him and take care of him? Idk just seems like she’s using him to inserting herself into a conversation about racism.

HOW is he still a minor if she 'co-parented'/ 'raised' him?

a local healthy eating campaign has posted this unreadable screenshot of jack in the local paper. i cannot find this article on the paper's website

I'll keep you posted

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I'd 100x over rather eat a plain baked spud than any of her overcomplicated slop. 'Simple' and 'accessible' her recipes AIN'T.

 

[fauxpoor]

Right then.

Jack, if you are reading this, and I know you are...

How the fuck did you allow Content to chew through a hoover wire? It isn't something that takes 2 minutes. It's a long chew. Hoover wires also contain copper, so if she ingested even a small part then it could get lodged in her intestines.

But whatever, eh? She should have been trained by now not to chew things, and when you leave her on multiple occasions there should be nothing in the vicinity that could cause her harm.

You have been lucky up until now, but the next wire she chews could be live.

Think on.

I think you meant WARNED!

 

[Dogmuck]

To add to the TLDR - we await @GrannyOgg’s deep dive into Jacks ~finances~

sorry I only skimmed the last thread I’ve been busy clearing my drains. Now fuxk off