Jack Monroe #388 Even @3ssex Police are laughing at her

[Mr Krabs]

This made me roll up, I'd love to see her just pass the application stage, let alone the other tests, or the medical, that would be a laugh.

Hi Jack, why do you want this job?
*Whines* My ex left me and I can’t afford my rent on a bungalow in one of the most expensive parts of the country and I can’t afford shower gel and my dad made me apply.
Err, OK. Do you have any skills?
I was once a shelf stacker and my manager told me I’d never amount to anything, so I spent years trashing her on Twitter. Oh and I was once in the fire service until I threw a tantrum and resigned and then they wouldn’t bloody take me back! Can you believe it????
Thanks we’ll err be in touch.

 

[Archduchess of Luxembourg]

Soooo... when we getting that pancake recipe. I want to find out how she removes the sugar from the dark chocolate.

If you simply melt it then sieve it into a tupperbox with your non-dominant hand, not only do you remove all the sugar but also all the calories. hth.

 

[Helatruralhome]

This made me roll up, I'd love to see her just pass the application stage, let alone the other tests, or the medical, that would be a laugh.

It's such a random job to mention- does Jack think she can do it because she's been on a lot of trains??

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Jack Monroe - Queen of False Starts

Queen of eggy farts

 

[Justacatindisguise]

It's such a random job to mention- does Jack think she can do it because she's been on a lot of trains??

I think she just threw it in because train strikes were in the news a lot and everyone was talking about Mick Lynch.

 

[flxwerpxwer]

Frau, I’m breaking my lurking to announce that I too have cracked the £20 shop!! Just £21 can feed me for a week from m&s so long as I use my storecupboard basics wisely!! So tonight’s cheese toastie was actually free because I didn’t need to break any of my £20 shop for it- magic what that JM can do for you

 

[Lauradianalou]

An environment with compulsory drug and alcohol tests could be good for her. But if she can’t cope with driving and finds it causes panic attacks, is train driver a sensible choice. Incidentally fire officer recruitment requirements include a driving license so no idea how the rumours she was going to be a firefighter have any truth.

She's not tall enough either...

 

[MM85]

It's such a random job to mention- does Jack think she can do it because she's been on a lot of trains??

Well, it's just pushing buttons, not much different to being on the bird app, innit.

 

[Lazarus]

JM & JHB on the telly box together

She makes me feel sick. 4.8 on Uber rating. So poor. So ruddy, bloody poor.

 

[HotesTilaire]

An environment with compulsory drug and alcohol tests could be good for her. But if she can’t cope with driving and finds it causes panic attacks, is train driver a sensible choice. Incidentally fire officer recruitment requirements include a driving license so no idea how the rumours she was going to be a firefighter have any truth.

She was training, to apply to be a firefighter. By training she means working out at the gym. She didn’t actually get to the applying part then, either, as far as I know.
Sometimes she says she was “training to enter the fireground”
ETA I don’t know how people seem to have got the impression she was actually about to slide down a pole and get in a red neenar to fight a fire. Oh, hang on...

 

[Orphan_Black]

Also, whilst it's quiet. Here's a video of Jack reading at a memorial service in 2019, for Harry Leslie Smith. She nearly shared a stage with Jeremy Corbyn but he LEFT that stage before she came marching in at 26.45. She admits she didn't bother writing anything, even though she's a LITERAL writer, so reads a bit of Harry's book instead. Kevin Maguire from The Mirror is presenting the event.

Spoiler: Linky Link

 

[Helatruralhome]

She makes me feel sick. 4.8 on Uber rating. So poor. So ruddy, bloody poor.

We don't even have Uber or Deliveroo type stuff in my county so it shows the privilege and lack of awareness of public transport desert's

 

[Onestorytoomany]

I’m almost almost at a point where I’m feeling sorry for Jack. The criticism must feel relentless at the moment.

But then I remember either her son is living in a house with no shampoo, hot water or light bulbs; or she’s pretending he is, and I’m all “Nah, she’s just a bleep”

I must admit at times i do too, but the she tweets something horrid and uncalled for and then i stop.

I bet in her own way she does THINK she does whats best for her son. I do think some decent time away from sm and a serious look at herself would improve her relationship with him, i mean how can it not.

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

LJC is probably SB's favourite among the revolving door of Jack's partners.

 

[MaineCoonMama]

Omg this has been driving me nuts. As if you can just apply to be a train driver on a whim. It involves a series of rigorous psychometric and aptitude tests. It's not like getting a trial shift in a café.

Omg your name! Hahahahaha!

 

[mchops]

I was furious at Jack.
Then I was furious at myself for being furious.

~confucius

 

[Winthropp Tuesday]

If you simply melt it then sieve it into a tupperbox with your non-dominant hand, not only do you remove all the sugar but also all the calories. hth.

Thank you for all that you do xx

 

[Onestorytoomany]

I have just came down from sorting the kids, made some jam and toast tea and burgled from the kitchen one of the reduced cupcakes, my kids made me buy after school, to catch up on her antics.

Anyone found out whos twisted her nipple so much today?

 

[Justacatindisguise]

She makes me feel sick. 4.8 on Uber rating. So poor. So ruddy, bloody poor.

Wait what? I'm poor (well, I'd say low income) and have a 4.87 Is it really expensive in some places?

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

Also, whilst it's quiet. Here's a video of Jack reading at a memorial service in 2019, for Harry Leslie Smith. She nearly shared a stage with Jeremy Corbyn but he LEFT that stage before she came marching in at 26.45. She admits she didn't bother writing anything, even though she's a LITERAL writer, so reads a bit of Harry's book instead. Kevin Maguire from The Mirror is presenting the event.

Spoiler: Linky Link

Link doesn’t work for me but it’s my fault not yours. My iPad hates Facebook with a g vengeance.

In trying to find it, I found this article: https://metro.co.uk/2018/11/28/toda...e-fight-for-the-world-he-believed-in-8188474/

Which is basically Jack saying that she’s really sorry that she didn’t bother with Harry even though he asked her to. Now he’s dead and she‘s really sad.