Jack Monroe #380 Hunger Hurts 2: Solar Lantern Boogaloo

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To quote JMs own words
Times change
People change

Jack Monroe is no longer relevant.

I’m waiting for the time someone asks her, “didn’t you used to be Jack Monroe?”
 
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Oh Jack, you are legitimately but unintentionally hilarious, and not in the way you think. Are you genuinely trying to take the moral high ground for apologising on one occasion for something you actually did?! A proper apology wouldn’t contain all the caveats and get outs = not genuine, must do better.
Every day is a tedious narcissistic litany of whines about how life is so hard for her. You’ve hit rock bottom now poppet - you're boring!

victim picks.jpg
 
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Her self love talk proved something to me though.

I think Jack is a smart woman, and always thought she didn't pass her GCSE's because her coursework brought her down. In that talk she mentioned how she was bad at handing CW in. (iirc). I reckon she had good enough marks on the exams and her laziness and procrastination caused her to hand in tit coursework, if she handed any in at all.

I'm a naturally lazy person, and have been known to procrastinate quite a bit, however, I don't pretend to have ADHD and always make sure I fulfil promises/deadlines, sometimes to my own detriment. Jack is selfish and entitled, but I don't think she's thick at all.
one of the main attributes Jack often claims to have due to their autism/adhd is hyperfocus , and I’m pretty confident that she also claimed to be able to choose what to hyperfocus on. If Jack didn’t bother doing coursework and/or revise , it’s purely down to her own lazinesses or arrogance . Not to mention , Jack claims to have been aware she was diagnosed “gifted” but unaware of her autism diagnosis. If she was struggling academically, I can not imagine any other scenario than student laziness that a teacher would not intervene with study strategies, or raising a concern that her parents hiding her diagnosis from her was potentially damaging her ability to succeed . Particularly if that student was “ gifted” and presumably expected to attend university, possibly even a prestigious university ( that’s what gifted meant in my last school anyway ). And particularly if that student was in a household with foster children as it would raise questions as to if the parents were acting in the best interests for all their children , bio foster or otherwise, but also if there was something happening in the home like neglect, abuse , conflict etc that was preventing the child strive at school.

my thought is that Jack is of average intelligence but thinks she is much cleverer than she is . Which is why her failings are are always someone else’s fault , be that the primary school teacher , the frost on the inside of the windows of her very impoverished tiny 5 bedroomed childhood home , the “ feral” children, the ED, being expelled for stealing a scalpel, walking miles to save the bus fare for food or being picked up from her after school activities in the wrong colour Mercedes .
 
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Hi all – I’ve been following along since HH2 and finally it was the Hole thing that made me finally reveal myself. If JM was born in 1988, she would have been in primary school during the peak grunge years (92-96). duck off out of appropriating an adolescence you never had.

Anyway, I always thought Jack was very annoying (I generally can’t stand people who just reflexively should “EEEBUL TORIES!!” all over Twitter rather than actually engaging with solutions to problems) and her recipes looked grim. But the more I’ve looked, the more I have Thoughts, especially around her career and finances. I’ve been a self-employed frau in the writing/media world and also run a smol biz, so I have some insight into what’s going on.

One correction/clarification from recent grunking – What media folk call “New Broadcasting House” is actually in London – it’s the shiny new building off Portland place. People refer to it as NBH and the 1930s older building next to it as Old BH, which is important if you’re going for interviews as you need to know which entrance to go to. BBC Breakfast and a lot of other stuff moved up to Salford, but a fair bit of radio and TV is still in London.

For talking head interviews, the BBC do pay a disruption fee if you have to go into the studio (it’s tit - £50 and you don’t always get it – and may not get anything for local radio/tv) but they should also pay travel/send a car for you. Other channels can pay a bit more (still not the big bucks – like £100-£200 if you’re lucky).

However, I do seriously take issue with her use as any kind of ‘expert’, and also that she needs hours to prepare for every interview. Surely after 10 years of campaigning on this stuff she should have a good grasp of the key stats and messages, and a few case studies up her sleeve? Yet every interview is just a bit ranty and unfocused. Apeing Martin Lewis by cranking out a few tears on Today ain’t going to cut it for long, honey.

I can see why she wouldn’t want a TV career – it’s hard work and involves a lot of networking, pitching and disappointment. Pilots pay poorly (if at all) and you probably won’t get paid much (if at all) for doing development work on pitches. More importantly, she has very little natural presenting talent – which you can improve a lot by practice on YouTube or Insta, but that also requires effort and consistency. Doesn’t necessarily need a lot of fancy kit to start with, but it does need graft and thought. And even more importantly, she has already had great media opportunities but fucked them up by being difficult to work with and not really delivering the goods.

Then there’s the books. I can tell you for a fact that books do not earn as much as you would think. But while some publishers will offer writers an initial royalties-only deal, generally established writers with agents get an advance for their next book – this might range from a few thousand to £££££, depending how famous you are and how good your agent is (after all, this is how agents get paid…). You then don’t get any further royalties until your book has ‘earned out’ (ie your publisher has recouped in sales what they paid you for your advance). The catch is that the advance might sound big but doesn’t all come at once. Usually you get a chunk on signing the contract, then a chunk when you submit the manuscript, then a chunk when the hardback comes out, and a chunk when the paperback comes out (if that’s how they’re doing it). You can also get extra payments for translations along the way.

General public speaking gigs often pay badly too, especially if you’ve got a book to flog. You might only get a couple of hundred quid even for something that sounds quite prestigious like the Hay Festival. You usually do get travel and accommodation paid (although often only 1 night accommodation). I strongly suspect her Edinburgh talks were booked to coincide with the obv delayed publication of her next book – what a wasted opportunity.

Finally, writing columns and op-eds also doesn’t pay that much, especially if they’re small and you’re not a massive name.

More generally, assuming that she doesn’t actually want to get “a job, any job” then the kind of career and lifestyle she seems to be wanting (writer, speaker, campaigner etc) relies on building your personal brand, especially if you want to do corporate partnerships.

Social media is an important part of that (I guess she classes all the time she spends on Twitter in the 100 hours a week?) but your public online persona is professional. You can have fun, talk about your life but be really careful what you say, especially if (as seems to be the case here) you are given to fabrication.

She comes across as a compulsive fabulist, just says anything that comes into her head and seems true enough to be plausible or gets her out of the current scrape (basically like Donald Trump) some may be deliberate eg trying to Google hack hoops with the hula hoop nonsense, other times it’s almost a survival reflex. Getting into twitter fights, badmouthing others in the industry, posting wildly inappropriate stuff about getting Burgered is such a bad look.

If this career is really destroying her mental health, as she seems to imply, and she’s howling with frustration about her financial stability, then she needs to step away, shut down her social media accounts, and get a bleeping job. Nobody is making her pursue this career except herself. And if she wants to do it, then there is so much she could be doing to help herself.

Then there’s the money. I just don’t understand her finances as a self-employed person or a business owner. Lots of things that you buy for work, either as a self-employed person or through a business, are tax-deductable – things like a phone, laptop, airpods (needed for interviews), personal grooming and stage/TV clothes, meals while you’re away working, I’m sure things like food, spoons for photoshoots etc etc etc – basically, anything that you can legitimately claim you need for work that you wouldn’t otherwise be buying. If you’re a VAT-registered business, you even get the Vat back! I don’t understand why she’s not open about this – clearly having a iPhone is fine if it’s mostly for your work, but don’t whine about being on your uppers and get defensive when people point out your nice stuff and ask questions about where your money is going. I do think the fact her company has folded is a Bad Look and a bit suspicious, it either smacks of wanting to keep her income hidden from the public, or total admin chaos (or both).

I just don’t understand what the duck she’s doing in these alleged ‘100 hour weeks/20 hour days’, and why she isn’t getting paid for it or pushing back. It’s clearly very poorly thought-out about how she is using her time and where she’s adding value – by this point she shouldn’t be having to say yes to every unpaid request, especially as she says she pushes back on it. I’m very strict about how much time I allocate to charity/low paid projects, and make it clear when I get requests that I don’t work for free. Like Nigella, I find it unfathomable how she hasn’t managed to convert all those books, talks, appearances and 0.5 million social media following into a sustainable career. “I’m working so hard but I still barely have any moneeee” is just a bullshit excuse by this point – you don’t have any money because you’re dreadful at managing it. And no, ADHD/chaos brain isn’t a good enough excuse. She is not valuing her time or energy, or that of those around her, if she continues to push a mad hamster wheel of unproductive activity.

In an ideal world it all works together – books, plus media appearances, plus writing, plus speaking, plus #sponcon and partnerships, consulting fees etc and Patreon can add up to a really decent living. It is fine if she earns money, and it’s fine if she earns money from big name brands if she then explains that she’s doing it in order to do the charitable stuff or demonstrably giving it away.

Patreon is the single most obvious someone like her with a good following and name recognition could be earning a decent, sustainable living. It could have been a stable source of income and community that she owned and controlled but she’s fucked it by doing nothing to nurture it and not delivering. Absolutely mental. What a colossal waste of good will and other folks’ money. I’m very glad people are starting to ask questions and demand refunds. She had an amazing opportunity with that, and has just fucked it at every turn.

One clarification on her blog. More technical fraus than I can comment on whether her basica wordpress site is really borked beyond belief, but looking back over many posts, I suspect everything from the copyright disclaimer just above [AD BREAK CREDITS ROLL] onwards, including the tip jar beg, is inserted into every post automatically from a template. So she can claim she didn’t deliberately rattle the jar on her HH2 blog, as she didn’t add an overt ask into the text she wrote, but it is still there nonetheless. It would not be difficult to edit that or change it to a Patreon link – and if she can’t do it herself then I’m sure there’s a hundred neckbeard web devs who would love to (OH HAI Russ!).

However, one of her biggest issues is that she’s actually quite tit at what she does.

If she was smart, she’d lean into the ‘Home economics’ thing – properly costed weekly/monthly/yearly shopping and cooking plans including energy, toiletries, other household consumables, bulk buys, even treats! Instead we get dishonest £20 “weekly shops” (plus £50 in the cupboard/freezer) and recipes/notrecipes that are lists of ingredients with 1p for a spoon of sugar, tuppence ha’penny for half a tomato plus a can of rinsed economy hoops (25p) nonsense.

More importantly, her grasp of nutrition is absolutely terrible, verging on dangerous. She has absolutely no business providing advice on cooking and eating for people struggling on low incomes when her recipes demonstrably don’t contain enough calories to feed normal humans and unrealistic pricing scenarios (weighing an anchovy, FFS – how much does the whole tin cost and what else can you do with them??). If you’re on a low income, you should be working on maximising calories, nutrients (protein and vits/minerals), flavour and satiety per £, especially for growing children. There’s nothing I see in her recipes or portion sizes to suggest that she thinks about that at all. Who on earth are they really for???

It feels to me like she’s just using the whole endeavour as a way to continue her eating disorder but focusing on weighing and costing rather than calories. She tries to get out of things like the shopping basket debacle by saying “well this works for me, you do you”, but when you have 0.5m followers and seven cookbooks to your name, you are an expert and what you say is taken to be advice.

Also, she’s objectively a terrible cook on a technical level – putting things in cold oil, boiling stuff that doesn’t need to be, odd flavour combos, no consideration of texture. She strikes me as someone who doesn’t actually like food, certainly doesn’t test her recipes as much as she says (is it triple tested, or ‘one and done’??)

Finally, the “Fit and active” vs “multiple disabilities” thing really grinds my gears. I appreciate that health conditions wax and wane (I also have an incurable health condition with variable symptoms) but the way she’s crumbly and in pain for sympathy one minute and yomping about the next minute boasting about how fit and active she is is hugely offensive to people who live the reality of disability and chronic illness. I will not get on to the fact that she is clearly weaponizing her recovery/sobriety/12 steps, as other fraus have more than enough Thoughts on that one.

TL;DR: bleep

Oh my! Is it possible to love a frau at first post? (don't worry Matei, we still love you too if you're reading)
 
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one of the main attributes Jack often claims to have due to their autism/adhd is hyperfocus , and I’m pretty confident that she also claimed to be able to choose what to hyperfocus on. If Jack didn’t bother doing coursework and/or revise , it’s purely down to her own lazinesses or arrogance . Not to mention , Jack claims to have been aware she was diagnosed “gifted” but unaware of her autism diagnosis. If she was struggling academically, I can not imagine any other scenario than student laziness that a teacher would not intervene with study strategies, or raising a concern that her parents hiding her diagnosis from her was potentially damaging her ability to succeed . Particularly if that student was “ gifted” and presumably expected to attend university, possibly even a prestigious university ( that’s what gifted meant in my last school anyway ). And particularly if that student was in a household with foster children as it would raise questions as to if the parents were acting in the best interests for all their children , bio foster or otherwise, but also if there was something happening in the home like neglect, abuse , conflict etc that was preventing the child strive at school.

my thought is that Jack is of average intelligence but thinks she is much cleverer than she is . Which is why her failings are are always someone else’s fault , be that the primary school teacher , the frost on the inside of the windows of her very impoverished tiny 5 bedroomed childhood home , the “ feral” children, the ED, being expelled for stealing a scalpel, walking miles to save the bus fare for food or being picked up from her after school activities in the wrong colour Mercedes .
Let’s face it her only gift is the grift.

Oh my! Is it possible to love a frau at first post? (don't worry Matei, we still love you too if you're reading)
Also excellent user name @MavisBeacon I believe you taught me typing when I was a wee FlirtyEleven.
 
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Super behind but can’t help but wonder why we’re debating the social class of a multigenerational landlord families where their estate’s value is calculated in the *millions*? 🥴 Like whether or not she learnt violin at school or wasn’t posh enough she’s taking the place of at least one actually working class women in the media? 🤷🏻‍♀️
 
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The suspected sock, who hasn’t tweeted once since 2016, is now rushing round Twitter to defend her heroine

D13853FB-E4FC-459E-A7E8-EA34B0DDF15A.jpeg
 
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One correction/clarification from recent grunking – What media folk call “New Broadcasting House” is actually in London – it’s the shiny new building off Portland place. People refer to it as NBH and the 1930s older building next to it as Old BH, which is important if you’re going for interviews as you need to know which entrance to go to. BBC Breakfast and a lot of other stuff moved up to Salford, but a fair bit of radio and TV is still in London.

Thanks for the correction on this - I am embarrassed about getting it wrong! I assumed at first NBH was London but then foolishly googled it and turned up a pre-2012 building in Manchester.

And thanks for all the insights from your media and publishing perspective! From what I do know, they match my experience entirely.
 
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@MavisBeacon what an excellent post for us non media industry types. Thank you for sharing that in so much detail.

I’m coming as a bitter old Haridan staring into space.
Thank you, dearest heart. Ironically, I spent so much time writing it I am now behind on a deadline. lol.
I shall be coming to court dressed as an email from her editor asking softly, gently when the duck those edits are actually coming.
 
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I bet Monroe nearly tit herself when she saw all those replies supporting Karl. Pity Karl wasn't a Tattler; after all that, I think he could say just about anything to her now on Twitter and she'd just have to suck it up.

(Thanks to these threads and JM's Twitter this past few days, my brain is well & truly frazzled. I spent a good few minutes searching for my specs today only to discover I was already wearing them - NOT on top of my head, but on my face - in front of my eyes - where specs should be.) :rolleyes:

Hope you're all taking care of your kind and precious hearts. ;) God she's so sickly sweet sometimes.
 
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What's she suing people for now? My strongly held conviction that she is a bullshitter?

I'm going as a trifle and I expect you all to defend me.
I’ll go as the gold spray on top so that if Big Dave is there he can fall into hilarious uncontrollable laughter at the sight of us and annoy Jack.
 
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I'm going to go to court wearing a t-shirt with "Macro" on the front and "Micro" on the back, to demonstrate that words (like herbs) are interchangeable.
 
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Excellent username and excellent post @MavisBeacon

As a slight addendum, when you have a book/product to flog (Jack is arguably the product here in the absence of her new book), free airtime is money. Exposure is profile raising. The bigger profile you have > the more opportunities come your way > the more people buy your next book/watch your next collab/read your interview.

One of my friends is an author. She does tours, she does endless interview, she chats nicely to her fans on SM. She doesn’t get paid for any of that bar expenses because she is getting a higher profile, meaning she sells more books.

The fact that Jack thinks she should be paid for deigning to grace Today or LBC or whatever with her appearance shows to me that she fundamentally misunderstands the relationship between her wanting to sell her stuff and the media. Effectively, she thinks she should be treated like a celebrity whose mere presence gives kudos to the programme she’s on.

Spoiler: it doesn’t.
 
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