A counselor/psychologist is definitely a good plan. I am 8 years down the line. I promise it gets easier and you get stronger. A year on is still early days.
Jack Monroe #365 I suggest you delete your Tweet
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The owner isn't a family member, like I said on the previous thread (or maybe the one before it, they're going so fast now I can't keep up), the owner has just the one property she rents out.
I've used to feel she had BPD. The crossover between some behaviours of BPD and ADHD are quite similar, and some (women particularly) are diagnosed with BPD/EUPD before ADHD is actually found to be the correct diagnosis. However it's possible she has both - the things that have always struck out to me with JM is the extreme emotional volatility - swinging wildly between moods, and the anger/vitriol/need for revenge.
But then what I struggle to see is how she attacks random people (DW, JO) - clinically working with patients of BPD I've seen them react to rejection/actions from people in their lives, but not just indiscriminately attacking anyone they take issue with. People with BPD that I've worked with are also (usually) very self aware and empathetic to the point of causing detriment to themselves, which I do not see remotely in JM. If I was to make a crappy armchair diagnosis I'd actually say she has histrionic personality disorder more than BPD.
But is yours a rather fetching Tiggy & Bo bag because therein lies the magic
if I were on Twitter, I’d actually do it. Wouldn’t bother me to screengrab my bank account.
the frustrating thing is that people are taking her to account in the wrong way. It shouldn’t be “challenging” her to prove her income - it should be relentlessly, laser focused on “you have an income derived from subscribers, who choose to support you despite not getting content for their money. You owe them transparency as they have a right to know if they are donating to someone better or worse off than themselves, and to be able to regularly review whether your output warrants the level of support you’re receiving”
Alas, it's a Radley.
It's not hard to declutter (child of a hoarder here, so I'm well used to the mentality that people aren't as valuable as things).
If the house was on fire, would I
1. Run through the flames to save it
2. Pick it up on the way out the door
3. Be at risk of getting trapped behind it
4. Be at risk of tripping over it
5. Immediately have to replace it because I wouldn't be able to survive (literally) the next 24 hours without it
6. Immediately have to replace it because I wouldn't be able to access funds without it for at least a week or would get properly sick over the following month or so
7. Have to get an identical replacement within a fortnight
8. Have to get some sort of replacement in the next couple of months
9. Be a bit sad I didn't have it anymore
10. Be vaguely irritated when I next need that specific thing that I now have to get a new one.
If it's in category 1, 2, 5 or 6, it's a keeper. 7 and 8 if there's room for it and it's absolutely perfect. All other categories - skip it.
I've already identified those things - basically, if the house goes up, I upend the linen bin, drop in two cats, my phone, laptop and medication from the fridge and leave. If it's near the door and in its case, Mr D's guitar goes over my shoulder in the process (I don't feel particularly strongly about my own guitars or bass, but I know that's important to him - just not important enough for me to run back upstairs to get).
Everything else is just stuff.
If it's a controlled move, I'd take more, but I'd start with essentials like somewhere to sleep, somewhere to cook, things to wear that I actually wear or keep the new place/me warm, musical instruments, books, plants and cats. It would be choosing what to keep, not what to get rid of.
If the house was on fire, would I
1. Run through the flames to save it
2. Pick it up on the way out the door
3. Be at risk of getting trapped behind it
4. Be at risk of tripping over it
5. Immediately have to replace it because I wouldn't be able to survive (literally) the next 24 hours without it
6. Immediately have to replace it because I wouldn't be able to access funds without it for at least a week or would get properly sick over the following month or so
7. Have to get an identical replacement within a fortnight
8. Have to get some sort of replacement in the next couple of months
9. Be a bit sad I didn't have it anymore
10. Be vaguely irritated when I next need that specific thing that I now have to get a new one.
If it's in category 1, 2, 5 or 6, it's a keeper. 7 and 8 if there's room for it and it's absolutely perfect. All other categories - skip it.
I've already identified those things - basically, if the house goes up, I upend the linen bin, drop in two cats, my phone, laptop and medication from the fridge and leave. If it's near the door and in its case, Mr D's guitar goes over my shoulder in the process (I don't feel particularly strongly about my own guitars or bass, but I know that's important to him - just not important enough for me to run back upstairs to get).
Everything else is just stuff.
If it's a controlled move, I'd take more, but I'd start with essentials like somewhere to sleep, somewhere to cook, things to wear that I actually wear or keep the new place/me warm, musical instruments, books, plants and cats. It would be choosing what to keep, not what to get rid of.
that is to say - it’s irrelevant - whether Patreon brings in £75 a month or £25k a month. What matters is that her subscribers - even those who performatively defend and support her to the death - should be able to see, at a glance, the pool of money that they’re contributing to. It’s not just about those with nothing, it’s about making small calculations. I contribute monthly to about 5 patreons, and if I’m cutting costs, I’ll temporarily unsubscribe from the ones where I’ll make the smallest dent by leaving
Fraus, I bought a kilo of mature cheese in Lidl yesterday for £3.99.
As you were
As you were
Joined fairly recently and have read the wiki but how did we work out Jack has an Emin? Is it an original rather than a print? It doesn't seem like something even SHE would be mental enough to shout about given the value.
To be honest I can easily believe this part. She said she puts her phone on permanent unlock when she’s cooking and following an online recipe, which I do too, because I don’t want my touch my phone while I’m cooking. Sometimes I forget to switch it back to lock mode, although I have never accidentally tweeted a coherent text message to someone or even just texted gibberish
@TheDragonWithAFlagon - just want to say how much I enjoy your posts 
I never would have thought of using the laundry basket for the cats. I hope I’d have the wits to empty all my dirty clothes out first. Imagine being left without all your possessions, but with all your dirty pants and PJs.
I never would have thought of using the laundry basket for the cats. I hope I’d have the wits to empty all my dirty clothes out first. Imagine being left without all your possessions, but with all your dirty pants and PJs.
#Jackshacks.
The word "cis" needs to disappear for good.
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This is spot on. The reason Jack hiding her patreon earnings is so controversial (apart from not fulfilling her side of the deal) is that many people will have signed up out of pity (note what Nigella said-it wasn’t ‘get in quick, this content is amazing’-it was ‘help Jack out’).
If people saw how much she’s getting per month and many realise it‘s more than they get for working, they may choose to stop parting with their money. Jack has no excuse to hide it.
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#bitgauche
My Aunty had a big house fire where 2 floors were completely destroyed. No one was injured. She left with nothing. Anyway, one of the amazing team of firefighters managed to pick up a photo album on their way out and very proudly presented it to her as it was her wedding and she didn’t have the heart to tell him it was her first one and they’d been divorced over 20 years
Eternally grunking so apologies if this pops up in a weird place.
Donating = giving your stuff to other people you don’t know, so they now own it and can do what they want with it.
Giving to friends = giving to people you know, so they now own it and can do what they want with it.
Sounds like she’s doing neither of those, if she’s going to be popping round checking on the stuff. Her friends are storing it for her, for when she’s back in a big house! If she ever leaves
…Also, I’m hardly a pillar of the community but I was giving clothes to Ukrainians a year ago. Yet the social campaigner, who regularly visits food banks and advises the struggling masses, whacks a few clothes in a charity bag and gets a big warm feeling from their philanthropy!
Perfect for when you're cooking and don't have enough hands.
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