Jack Monroe #365 I suggest you delete your Tweet

[Tabitha D]

Personally I highly doubt her dad will have bought her a flat. Why should he? She has earned a fortune over the years and has pissed it up the wall. She’s obviously financially irresponsible, why would he reward that? (Not to mention the various other issues). He has four kids, and grandchildren, and TBH I think he’d be better reserving the inheritance for the grandkids - and possibly the kids who are genuinely hardworking and need a hand (e.g. the daughter who is training to be a nurse).
She’s 34, FFS, not a helpless child. She’s hurtling towards middle age. Her parents have probably had an absolute gutfull of her and her constant lies and drama.

 

[Jelly Bean]

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ETA

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Why did SB need 'grounding' over the last few years? He's a kid. He should just be thinking about kid stuff.

 

[Cucumberthunder]

Mini grunk this morning and a few thoughts

6 months seems to be how long she says she has on the lease, so I think that's why she is fixated on that date.

I think she's probably being very naive about the rental market - it's changed drastically since she was last looking and I get the impression she thinks she'll be able to move straight from the shitty bungalow into somewhere new. In reality she'll really struggle with her credit history, 2 pets and a lot of landlords won't let a house with 1 bedroom to an adult with an older child (if she keeps up the fiction that SB is living with her)

I also wonder whether the 6 month thing is performative (what isn't with Jack) as a sort of count down to her lovely life being OVER and her being forced to return to poverty. A tip jar rattling in the background.

Or she's playing the long game - she won't be able to find anywhere and the landlady is going to try to TRAP HER in another two year deal, rather than letting her shift to a rolling contract.

I think all the stuff about "making things fit" is more about making sure people know just how SMALL her new place is likely to be. Rather than having a specific place in mind.

Agree with others that her admitting to having so much stuff when on the bones of her arse won't be a good look.

I wish she wouldn't use it the term hoarding so flippantly.

Sorry for the random capitals, was challenging my inner Jack.

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

Update.

 

[Cookiecookie]

I suspect she's using the word hoarding as another deflection tool. It's a recognised MH condition, so people will be wary of criticising it, just like all the other things she uses.

 

[A Bit Like Marmite]

That phone is more sentient than her

 

[Sideboard Bob]

To the beaver people.

 

[Smeghead]

I am glad that she is hopefully and finally doing stuff for that kid. Hes been through alot. I dont believe he will hang around for long though if this indeed is her way of keeping him visiting.

My best friend started to pull away from their dad at about 13 and started to spend more time hanging out with me and her other mates, this gradually dwindled until her GCSE where she literally went about once every six weeks.


Also her sleeping in the lounge will make it awkward for him bringing home friends and eventually gfs. Imagine bringing home a girl to hang out in your room and finding your mum draped in bed across the living room with a bowl of bedpan stew.

She really doesn't need to make this much fuss moving, just sell that tatt you dont need and take what you do. If she is indeed buying this place then good for her. I hope it will cause her to shut up about RENTING and i really do hope she will hurry up and get a job.

Bascially i wish she would just crack on and stop the perfomative bollocks.

I will bet any money that she’s is moving into a two bed place but she will have one bedroom as an office with a sofa bed in. But she’ll call it a one bed, as, poor 🥹

 

[CookieZippy]

This tweet contains a reference to the squigs views on gender. What I'd like people to do is completely ignore the first sentence and join me in hooting at the second one because it's a peach. If you really can't ignore it, feel free to clip it and take it to the gender discussion thread with my blessings.

Spoiler: Funny second sentence

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The word "cis" needs to disappear for good.

 

[traumatised sideboard]

There are so many steps involved in your bag doing multiple tweets for you that I am astonished the quarter-witted pillock can even manage it herself without adult assistance. Maybe the bag should be the new Caroline, turns out there's no need for hands at all! Praise beans.

ETA: @BeautifulTrauma I have no idea who that is, I am too old for TikTok she seems successful tho so is definitely not me.

 

[jenny2603]

This tweet contains a reference to the squigs views on gender. What I'd like people to do is completely ignore the first sentence and join me in hooting at the second one because it's a peach. If you really can't ignore it, feel free to clip it and take it to the gender discussion thread with my blessings.

Spoiler: Funny second sentence

 

[chocwaffle]

There's just no WAY her phone did that randomly in her handbag

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

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She tells on herself time and time again, whether or not all this stuff was from a charity shop or a puddle or Jerry Hall the sheer privilege of having the space to store it all is off the scale and something she’ll never acknowledge.

 

[PorkandBeans]

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Bless her grifting little heart, why would it take her poor, broke a$$ SIX MONTHS to declutter the shitty bungalow she’s only lived in for a few years?? Here I thought she couldn’t even afford to buy shower gel.

We moved house relatively recently. It only took a couple of weeks to sort, discard, and pack the accumulated piles of things from a house we’d lived in for 15 years, with kids.

 

[Ooointitot]

Another insightful MN post, well done MN, you’re smashing it!
Can I propose ”I don't think she likes transparency for some reason” as next thread title….

 

[Orphan_Black]

I really hope Molly's thing has never before brewed tea to spill.

I really want a gotcha moment from it.

 

[SmillieKylie]

Big day for Jack, latest Inflation figures just announced, eeeek it’s risen to 10.1% ! Martin Lewis still on hols, Jack will be wanted by the media to provide us with answers, and the Squigs will be clamouring to see the VBI I expect, although some are already using it accordingly. Probably the Beta version, hopefully the rest of us will get a glimpse of it later today

 

[Brian Butterfield]

Could we expand the range?
A toaster with ‘Not a toaster’ on it.
A fridge freezer with “my other fridge freezers are Smegs”
A coffee mug with “I don’t drink coffee” on.
A T-shirt with “Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got
I'm still, I'm still Jack from near three council estates.”
A bread knife with ‘for meat’ written on it

 

[Witchfinder Sargeant]

I've just spent two minutes poking my phone's touchscreen with

• keys
• lid of a tube of lipstick
• case for a glass nail file
• lid and base of a bottle of hand sanitiser (plastic base, metal lid)
• work security pass (plastic case and cloth lanyard)
• corner of my leather purse

You know, the sort of detritus that you cart around with you and it is likely that an unlocked phone would come into contact with in your bag. Nothing. Zip, zilch, nada. I certainly didn't manage to open twitter, find a random account, find a random tweet of theirs, open that tweet, open the GIF menu, select a random GIF that I've never used before, add it to my reply, and hit send.

 

[Pocahontas]

Hands up who thinks Jack should have a ‘I’m Downsizing!’ garage sale?

I call dibs on the rag rug.