Jack Monroe #335 Boob, I guess

[Ostapbender]

If that's referring to me, like I said I didn't go to uni, I went on an evening and I went after spending many years at writing groups. I am also a voracious reader who loves words.

You either have a talent for it, or you don't, but anyone can get better if they practise and have help. I've spent many evenings listing to turgid, overwritten prose produced by people who after receiving their feedback from the rest of the group replied with 'well I'm not changing a word as it's perfect' despite it being painfully dull.

One of the most charming, wonderful pieces of writing was written by a guy who left school at 15 and it was his life as a gardener, sounds so dull but we all looked forward every month to the next bit as he had a wonderful way with words, that really deserved to get published.

She really needs to find a writing group, take a piece she is working on and listen to her feedback but in her own words SHAN'T!

Ah no it wasn't responding to you, I couldn't find the post I was referring to at that point; sorry for any confusion. Also, spot on x

 

[Elastoblast]

In comparison to the titgate pic, her boobs look an awful lot more matronly here.

She wore her Playtex that day. Couldn't have girls bouncing around unfettered

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Why so sad?
Lip filler bad.

There is definitely a touch of le derrière de baboon about her there. Unless it's her forced sadface giving her an unfortunate lip curl .

Jack and computers - surely she can't be useless with them, remember she said she knows how to triangulate us right to our front doors? She cannot lie after all.

 

[JeanBurns76]

She really is a terrible writer.

I particularly dislike her overuse of using “and” over and over (and over and over) again as a form of emphasis.

Don’t forget irregardless!

 

[steverc]

Welcome to the worst (BESTEST) corner of the internet @steverc. We love a new ninny joining the ranks.

Pray tell how you found us, dear heart.

Been here a while, drawn in by The Madness That Was Vonny. But the Jack Disconnect (here/ the ROTW) really grinds my bleeping gums. She’s an in plain sight *thief* and I cannot stand it.

 

[Soapy Dolphin]

Was Boob on Hammock only yesterday? Sheesh!

Very

toot toot.

 

[Droosie123]

It won’t be published, she never finishes anything.

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Why canal in bits?
Jack's unruly tits

 

[jenny2603]

It won’t be published, she never finishes anything.

Plus by the time it's ready there will be a completely different government and little to no appetite for Jack shrieking about Iain Duncan Smith. It's arguably too late already.

 

[Hollaaa]

Why Jack write more nonsense?
To mither Dead Cat Johnsons.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Why Squigs blocked?
Hunger Names mocked

Can’t keep up your pecker?
No Chancellor of Exchequer

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Can't wait to hear how Jack's HMRC call has led to the collapse of the government.

I thought it was due to her absolute pumble of a scathing excerpt from her tactless new book (that hopefully won't be published). Remember what she said this morning?

Screenshot by @Veronicaaa


Obviously Rish and Saj mates are quaking in their patent leather shoes at the thought of Jack's book coming out.

 

[Pimpinella]

Dial M for Mither

As a Hitchcokian scholar I quite like this. We could have a whole list "The Trouble with Jack", Saboobtage", "The Idiot who Knew too Little" and perhaps my favourite "To Catch the Nightmeat".....

 

[Limey]

I thought it was due to her absolute pumble of a scathing excerpt from her tactless new book (that hopefully won't be published). Remember what she said this morning?

View attachment 1394797

Screenshot by @Veronicaaa


Obviously Rish and Saj mates are quaking in their patent leather shoes at the thought of Jack's book coming out.

The political establishment SHOOK to its very core after hearing that Jack had released a teaser of her forthcoming 80,000 words of bollix.

 

[Knit one Pearl one]

Slopbot has spoken.

 

[Veronicaaa]

I thought it was due to her absolute pumble of a scathing excerpt from her tactless new book (that hopefully won't be published). Remember what she said this morning?

View attachment 1394797

Screenshot by @Veronicaaa


Obviously Rish and Saj mates are quaking in their patent leather shoes at the thought of Jack's book coming out.

She didn't actually write that tweet, one of the squigs did and she 'liked' it!

 

[jenny2603]

Sometimes when Jack is quiet, I enjoy a stroll down memory lane, gazing upon the dervishes and bangers of yore. Today's golden oldie is that time Jack went to see I' Daniel Blake, ruined some innocent woman's visit to the pictures by howling and became so enraged she punched a wall.

I am Daniel Blake – and there are millions more like me | Jack Monroe

Writer and activist Jack Monroe knows from their own experience that Ken Loach’s portrayal of life on benefits is heart-wrenchingly accurate

www.theguardian.com

 

[Pimpinella]

On the subject of night meat…

I'm surprised she hasn't done her own version of Visage's Night Train from the 80s..... I can see the video now, a load of hammock and saggy bra...

 

[Veronicaaa]

She's tweeting about butter.

 

[tattybrogan]

Okay, and?