Jack Monroe #332 A doctor, a teacher and a ceramicist walk into a bar

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OMG just give him some lip filler and it's the SAME PERSON.
I missed the slot as I had to actually interact on my teams call. I feel Jack is really starting to look like that women from Eastenders, you know the Mitchell sister that went wayward.
ETA Danielle Westbrook. I don’t mean anything untoward but it’s the shape of the lips and nose. Essentially the bottom half of her face.
 
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Don’t put shampoo in your washing machine, it foams up far too much, the foam backs up and comes out of the detergent drawer and goes all over the place. Source: the time a bottle of shampoo leaked in my suitcase and I threw all my clothes straight into the washing machine.
Odd, given months back she was saying about using ivy leaves (which would be free) in the washing machine - guess when she's getting cash she will say whatever bullshit to get people to waste money
 
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Quoting myself like a dick to say that I’ve had a minute to think about this and I’m settling on cocks, speed medication and a fancy candle.
*Money-saving tip* If you're clever with your choice of fancy candle, you won't have to buy any cocks #jackshacks
 
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Odd, given months back she was saying about using ivy leaves (which would be free) in the washing machine - guess when she's getting cash she will say whatever bullshit to get people to waste money
Ivy leaves?! In the washing machine?
Send Arielos
 
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Thing is, hygiene poverty is so totally a thing. Many years ago I lived in really crappy (rogue landlord) shared accommodation where you had to put a quid in the shower and the shower stall itself was filthy and the water flow was TIMED to I think 10 min and the water pressure like a spit in the air. No washing machine on the premises. So yeah, I wasn't as clean as I could have been and one day at work someone brought it up to me. They were reaslly nice and understanding but I was SO. SHAMED.

I have not experienced generational poverty, my granparents were hand to mouth and starved in a nationwide famine but that was in a different country where living hand to mouth off the land and sea was not unusual for the times. I was immigrant working class growing up but that does not always mean the same as poor, much less generationally oppressed and locked out of many things that civic society takes for granted (which is what true generational poverty is, imho). If I had know that a few months of severe and scary cashflow restriction = real poverty then I would have done a Jack and had a cushy media career. Silly me.

Issues with rogue landlords and crappy accommodation are absolutely worse now than when I experienced it for a few months, 20 years ago. Especially in recent migrant accommodation. It often affects recently migrated lone young men. There is also a real issue with period poverty.

There is a real issue here, and it should be discussed, instead we have Jack cosplaying about her Pretty Woman experience in Ratners. She's so white. So 80s. So full of tit.

Also - I know booze facial bloat when I see it and if Jack wasn't one year and one day sober, I'd say I'd seen it.
 
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I mean, they were absolute tit bloody tips, from someone who couldn't be bothered looking up hints online.

Buy own brand and do something potentially harming to your washing machine, great Jack :rolleyes:

Even something like, "Before you throw out tubes, cut them open as there is always a few days of product left behind," is a better idea, and doesn't rely on offensive stereotypes like poor people are dirty, filthy and greasy.
 
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A luvvie on her twitter page telling her she smashed it on Lorraine and that she's fcking awesome. 🙄
 
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I can't speak for anywhere else, but there's a lot of jewellers in my local shopping centre, and they're very snooty. They would not take too kindly if you turned up filthy and greasy saying you wanted a job. Of all the shops there, they definitely seem to see themselves as being rather above their customers.
someone with as much savvy as Jack would know how to present themselves. To me this reeks of a lingering honk of performance to further her blogging.
acknowledging she was unkempt with dirty hair adds nothing to the story if it were true. Nobody who was so down on their luck that they were physically dirty would mention this fact when talking about their lack of success in finding employment.
with parents and friends nearby it seems strange that she couldn’t go to one of their houses for a freshen up before going to look for work.
I’m sorry but I don’t believe a word of it. I think it is all fantasy for the blog.
 
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Be a laugh if The Teacher spent the whole date pointing out all her spelling mistakes & grammatical errors on twitter. 😬
 
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Top tip— Shower fully dressed and you can wash your body and clothes at the same time.

You can thank me later, Jack
You have just brought back to mind a childhood memory that I had long blocked. It is such a weird thing I am not sure I should share in case you all judge, but please don't.

We didn't have a shower, so bathtime it had to be. I would only have a bath if I could leave my vest underpants and socks on. It created a lot of issues, but eventually my mum just gave in and left me to it. It wasn't anything to do with being seen, as the bathroom did have a working lock. I just like the feel of being in the bath clothed. 🤷‍♂️ It was also when I was old enough to bath myself so what was going on in my head God only knows. It wasn't until I was in my late teens that I stopped this bizarre behaviour.

Back to Jack. I have just seen the Lorraine clip. What a load of nonsense.

Use shampoo in the washing machine and damage the washer, flood the kitchen and ruin your clothes. They produce low foaming washing powder/liquid/capsules for a reason.

Use watered down shampoo to use as shower gel. Why water it down? Surely that would just mean that most of it would end up down the drain as it would be difficult to use.

Use the own brand products to save money. You can only do that if you use branded products to start with, which is unlikely if you are struggling to buy the products in the first place.

Why didn't Jack suggest the use of old fashioned soap? It is far cheaper than shower gel, works just as good, and lasts for ages.
Why didn't jack suggest buying large size cheaper shampoo with a friend and dividing it between you?
Why didn't she suggest using a Metro and sock for that time of the month?
 
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Did she say she went into Ratners Jewellers for a job? Didn’t Gerald Ratner say in the 90s the stuff they sold was crap and that basically sent them under? I can’t recall seeing a Ratners jewellers in decades. Please a Southend frau tell me there wasn’t a Ratners at the time of the Great PovertyTM in 2012. I would LOVE IT, if this lie could be disproved because there wasn’t a shop 🤣🤣🤣
I just watched back and she didn’t say specifically which jewellers it was. I can’t remember if we ever had a Ratners here though, it doesn’t ring a bell. That jewellery story did remind me of a time I went for an interview in a Southend jewellers (would have been around 2007) and the candidate before me had arrived straight up from the beach still in her bikini. So it seems bikini ok, greasy hair not ok
 
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