Jack Monroe #303 The lingering honk of burning martyr..
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Jack after coming up with the shite ‘white wing’ insult.
The
Not a tax frau, but have had a ltd company in the past and file as self-employed now. Also have done basic accounts for a small charity.
You absolutely have to file accounts every year as a limited company, even if the company didn't make a penny, or is dormant. Same with self-employment. Let's say Jack didn't make the basic threshold for personal tax in a lockdown year, she/or the company she runs would still have to file. It's not up to her to decide.
She's a total bleeping liar about her income .... and come to think of it, everything else.
I hate monroe with every fibre of my being. I’ve sat in A&E listening to my child saying over and over again ‘I don’t want to die ,I don’t want to die ‘ in this type of scenario. I am one of the very lucky parents who didn’t lose their child . I still have panic attacks when I hear sirens if my child is out because of other attempts they’ve made when they’ve not been in the house and the police have come to get me to take me to her . Tonight’s reading has really shaken me to my core and I’m so sorry for what people have gone through. Whenever I get myself In the state of panic and sorrow remembering what has happened I remind myself of how much worse it must have been for what my child was going through. I’m so sorry for what people have gone through being triggered by monroe being an utter unfeeling selfish monster. I’ve had side splitting laughs on here at the wit and wisdom of the canal but tonight it’s reminded me of what a despicable and dangerous person monroe is. I’ve tried to put this under a spoiler but I know previously it hasn’t worked , I must not be doing it right . If it doesn’t work then mods please feel free to delete. Sorry for this rambling I just wanted to get it off my chest because I’ve never shared with my family what has happened.
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Her company tax and her income tax are different.
You pay corporation tax on any profit the company makes. You are legally obliged to submit your accounts to companies house regardless of whether or not you made any profit or indeed even made a single transaction (companies still have to submit dormant accounts).
Her income could come from PAYE and/or dividends. Directors are usually made to file self assessment - these are not made public. You can’t take a dividend if the company hasn’t made profit.
So say her gross profit for the year was £40k, but her company paid salaries of £40k, then her corporation tax bill would be £0 (because the company made no profit after costs).
If she wanted to pay herself a dividend, thus saving a personal tax percentage - first £2k of dividends are tax free (remember she would have to show a company profit of £2k to take these) and the basic rate tax on dividends is 8.75% instead of 20% PAYE tax, then she has to show the company has made profit and pay the tax on this profit (19%).
I am a company director. No matter what, I take my PAYE allowance (£12570). I will also take my £2k dividend. Majority of the time though, I take the rest of my salary as PAYE because I find it easier to know my personal tax is paid each month.
You pay corporation tax on any profit the company makes. You are legally obliged to submit your accounts to companies house regardless of whether or not you made any profit or indeed even made a single transaction (companies still have to submit dormant accounts).
Her income could come from PAYE and/or dividends. Directors are usually made to file self assessment - these are not made public. You can’t take a dividend if the company hasn’t made profit.
So say her gross profit for the year was £40k, but her company paid salaries of £40k, then her corporation tax bill would be £0 (because the company made no profit after costs).
If she wanted to pay herself a dividend, thus saving a personal tax percentage - first £2k of dividends are tax free (remember she would have to show a company profit of £2k to take these) and the basic rate tax on dividends is 8.75% instead of 20% PAYE tax, then she has to show the company has made profit and pay the tax on this profit (19%).
I am a company director. No matter what, I take my PAYE allowance (£12570). I will also take my £2k dividend. Majority of the time though, I take the rest of my salary as PAYE because I find it easier to know my personal tax is paid each month.
Perilous? I mean, that doesn't make any sense either but this is Jack and her puppy brain we're talking about, and she might be associating lack of money with being in danger. I dunno. I wish you could learn to speak Jack on Duolingo!
Hey ninny nonnies, sorry I'm late but I was moving into the house I BOUGHT AFTER YEARS OF RENTING whilst WORKING for the NHS and saving bleeping hard. After reading about the nuzzling 
incident despite several bleach mind baths I just couldn't go there for a bit. I've tuned back in but all I see on the JM hellscape is blah blah blah (dinosaur snore) ME blah blah summat that Scrappy Do might say blaaaaaah ME etc. Have I missed anything essential?
Is MancB OK? He was absent on here and Masterchef for a bit....
Are you all ok?
Jack's a bleep and Nigella can still duck off xx
incident despite several bleach mind baths I just couldn't go there for a bit. I've tuned back in but all I see on the JM hellscape is blah blah blah (dinosaur snore) ME blah blah summat that Scrappy Do might say blaaaaaah ME etc. Have I missed anything essential?Is MancB OK? He was absent on here and Masterchef for a bit....
Are you all ok?
Jack's a bleep and Nigella can still duck off xx
So all the times she supports other people, like other cooks for example, it’s all in secret. Because it would be stupid to say nice things about people in public, like to your 500k twitter followers.
Imagine hiring an accountant to manage all the money you don't make, who then can't even manage to file your accounts on time two years in a row!
Pmsl at Rishimate being tagged in the first one. That was 16 months ago, Jack... what's your excuse now?!
The others are her trying to tell an actual accountant she knows better than him what the job entails. Accounting? Completed it, mate!
I’m so sorry you had to read this.
Fraus- I’m conscious I don’t always think/spoiler things when I post things and don’t always realise certain things may cause distress. I wouldn’t want anyone to be hurt by things I post or by sharing the horrible smol pixie’s terrible posts, I would say it is safe to say if she “writes a thing” that should be the massive trigger warning for all of us given that she seems to have taken to being reckless about *that* topic
HMRC should literally be headhunting the canal!
I've been a poor and then been better off. As has Jack. My first tattoo was paid for by my daughter as a present and my second by me when I had a bit of extra money and was doing well. I'm doing more than OK now but have other commitments or else I'd think about having one more.
This line of thought comes with the 'they have a massive tele though' ...
I've been in an owned house today to value it. Kids clearly loved and looked after but f***me the house was awful, 4 kids from 13yrs to 10 months. 2 bedrooms. I could barely move into the bedrooms. Living room had everything stacked up each side of the chimney so the younger children had room to play.
They did however have a big TV! Every Tory loves that. It was blaring out some kids programme. The younger kids were watching it, in between being interested in me. They probably pay so much a week/ month for it and put a pound in the box or it goes off. They'll be paying £1500 for an £800 TV.
They were such a lovely couple and I fear that their dreams of moving to a bigger house won't come to much (unless they have 100k hidden away).
Poverty sucks. Poverty CAN be homeowners.
frothing cannons of barely-comprehensible bile and poorly-threaded attempts at argumentWords she uses in stupid ways:
All of them
Forays
Ghastly
Motley crew
Frothing cannons (what the duck is a frothing cannon? Sorry Blessed Manc/Rev)
Entrenched
Lickspittle
Haste
Murky conclusions
She's described her own writing style rather well!
Vile creature. You Jack, you should be ashamed. You won't be though, I expect you will just yomp on, and you'll never yomp alone. You sad lonely old
.Sure Jan. Sure.
She didn’t earn enough to pay tax? Is she trying to say that she was living off Patreon donations only? I don’t know what my wee brother earns but it’s in the low 20k a year for a full time job and he pays tax. How did she afford her rent and bills in that year? The other week she said that when she lived with Louisa they split everything 50/50.
So who paid her rent and bills that year? If she didn’t earn enough to pay tax? Her followers? Is this what she’s saying?
She didn’t earn enough to pay tax? Is she trying to say that she was living off Patreon donations only? I don’t know what my wee brother earns but it’s in the low 20k a year for a full time job and he pays tax. How did she afford her rent and bills in that year? The other week she said that when she lived with Louisa they split everything 50/50.
So who paid her rent and bills that year? If she didn’t earn enough to pay tax? Her followers? Is this what she’s saying?
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no it’s ok. don’t worry about what you post . We all know what she’s like so we know what types of things are likely to be on here. I feel a bit better having spilled my guts for some reason . Sometimes it’s better to get things out in an anonymous forum than confide in family and get them up to high doh as well.
At times I think I should just come off here but then, like tonight , I feel better that I’ve got stuff out in a safe environment. I wish so much that the idiots who fall for monroes tit posting about the evil corner of the internet or whatever tripe she calls us realise that this forum is a group of wise,clever knowledgeable and caring individuals.
I'm unemployed in social housing living on £940 UC a month, believe me, there was no thought in my mind of big TV steretypes or any such thing. It was just a tongue in cheek comment about all her tattoos... If it came across as serious, it wasn't the intent.
No fat ladies 88 everyone is starving. Me and my other duck buddy 22 are off for a walk but thank (space) you whistlers for legs 11. Clicketty click X
Husband in his addict days swapped a bag of heroin for one. They both nodded off halfway through. If you must do that kind of thing, give them it after they've done it!
Anyway, I started, but could not finish that essay. She's an awful, spiteful, triggering, dangerous individual. Applying to be a train driver, or teacher training courses did make me laugh though. She'd struggle to find any kind of proper get dressed and go out to work and actually pay taxes kind of job. Especially anything that involved working with the general public!
She’s just referring to herself as eloquent. I feel like bashing my head off a brick wall. She’s got the hide of a rhino.
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