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Jack Monroe #298 Perhaps she would get a mortgage if she paid her taxes and didn’t spank money on rusty spoons
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You're no George Carlin, Jack.
I'd just like to inform Jack that I have three hydrangeas and loads of other plants.
Not the bloody hydrangea again. Buy a potted one you prat.
A hat hat! Two hats and neither a pigskin 
Stetson
Happy cinqo de Mayo Hellman’ fans!
Stetson Happy cinqo de Mayo Hellman’ fans!
I know we're not supposed to say it. But I hold the unpopular opinion that Cack is not attractive. Her mug actually winds me up.
I heard the same thing about potato print art.
Since St. Jack is such a Patron of the PoorTM, surely she should be putting her (non-taxed, probably, allegedly) money where her (gobby, maybe) mouth is and donate her “pasta collection” to The Trussell Trust.There’s something honestly quite grim about a self-professed poverty campaigner hoarding food for “aesthetic” reasons.
Never seen a working class person have an aneurism over not having a hydrangea.
Agreed. I don't need the Pov Princess of Southend telling me how to vote, because I'm not a massive melt, and I have at least 100% more braincells than she does.
Particularly don't need it from her when she's pretending she's a working class kid done good. I was born in Calton in 1972. She knows nothing of deprivation.
silver's back, we have our cinco de mayo hats, jack's a bleep and still banging on about a bleeping hydrangea... all is well 
"As per, she opened her mouth and a whole sea of garbled and deliberately disingenuous bollocks fell out"
Too long???
Yes all those marvellous people who apparently let him go hungry and be cold for 18 months. So blessed.
Let's remember they forced her to give up her job with the fire service because none of them would help with childcare, failed to notice she was living rough but presumably were able to help out with childcare when she was on the game. Yeah, they sound ace.
I can’t help think (hope) that these interviewers are being disingenuous by getting her on and mentioning the VBO and then when it fails to come out or it is. Shambles they come back to question and challenge her.
Jack just seen that brand new film The Breakfast Club?
Also, the Vesta Biryani Index is close to 4 months in the making. By Jack's own admission that means its out of date.
Lovely to see Silver and hats!
Just posting to see my pigskin sombrero really. Hope this doesn’t give J-Mo any ideas.
Can we all chip in to buy her a Gondola, and duck her off back to Venice? I'd pay good money in the hope she gets lost in the North Sea like Only Fools and Horses.
Except Rodders and Del Boy did become millionaires in the end
She’s like Del Boy trotter. This time next year we’ll be millionaires
HATS! 
Just doing a screenshot so that Makka Pakka Sombrero is preserved on the thread.
I am beyond sick of Housing Jack, Politics Jack (we're not one of the areas that has a local election so it feels even more pointless), and Spiteful Pasta Hoarder Jack. I don't know how anyone can have a lovely couple of days in Venice and then return in a mood that makes the Wicked Witch of the West look chummy. What went wrong on that holiday?! Did she fall into one of the smelly canals, but no one noticed because it matched her natural scent? Got lost wandering in circles looking for Per Rialto? Did Harold misplace his false teeth? Did they stop her at the airport? I can imagine her trying to smuggle ingredients back into the UK, so maybe there was a pre-flight gelato chaos? Whatever the cause, she's been even more obnoxious than usual on her return, and I'd be happy if her hands were full of pasta (as opposed to her eyes), so that she'd be forced to stop typing for a bit.
Why Jack type?
She's full of spite.
Why canal weep?
She never sleep.
Goes to Italy
Behaves pitifully
Angry Jack
so full of crap.
If I were near
I'd push her clear
out of the way
on a Gondola she'll stay.
Sailing along
with designer bag
she'd do a collab with Billy Bragg
All day she'd float
All day she'd gloat
Lure her with cheap cheese
unleash some bees.
We'd all thrive
Happy villainous hive.
Just doing a screenshot so that Makka Pakka Sombrero is preserved on the thread.
Ooo I'm excited for you. What dino shapes are in there? Any stegosauruses? Stegosaurii?
I am beyond sick of Housing Jack, Politics Jack (we're not one of the areas that has a local election so it feels even more pointless), and Spiteful Pasta Hoarder Jack. I don't know how anyone can have a lovely couple of days in Venice and then return in a mood that makes the Wicked Witch of the West look chummy. What went wrong on that holiday?! Did she fall into one of the smelly canals, but no one noticed because it matched her natural scent? Got lost wandering in circles looking for Per Rialto? Did Harold misplace his false teeth? Did they stop her at the airport? I can imagine her trying to smuggle ingredients back into the UK, so maybe there was a pre-flight gelato chaos? Whatever the cause, she's been even more obnoxious than usual on her return, and I'd be happy if her hands were full of pasta (as opposed to her eyes), so that she'd be forced to stop typing for a bit.
Why Jack type?
She's full of spite.
Why canal weep?
She never sleep.
Goes to Italy
Behaves pitifully
Angry Jack
so full of crap.
If I were near
I'd push her clear
out of the way
on a Gondola she'll stay.
Sailing along
with designer bag
she'd do a collab with Billy Bragg
All day she'd float
All day she'd gloat
Lure her with cheap cheese
unleash some bees.
We'd all thrive
Happy villainous hive.
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