Jack Monroe #288 Only a psychopath separates a bunch of bananas for a photograph.

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Soup or Noodle

Soup or Noodle

heretoreaditall2019 said:
Oh no, it’s bad. Send deliveroo ASAP

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PS sorry for the hugely unprofessional scroll bars, silver and marm would NEVER, but I have an iPhone mini cos smol hands 😭
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How can she be so bad at cooking? She has plenty of supplies and literally all day every day to practice.

Surely the belly pork won't be served like that. It looks like to fat hasn't even started to render down 🤢
 
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MotorcycleEmptiness

MotorcycleEmptiness

Soup or Noodle said:
How can she be so bad at cooking? She has plenty of supplies and literally all day every day to practice.

Surely the belly pork won't be served like that. It looks like to fat hasn't even started to render down 🤢
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I know! Looks far too white still.
And double slop as well :sick:
 
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E

Edie Po

Did she stick that belly pork on the radiator or just use a hair dryer cause that's not even cooked.

I'm howling 😂😂😂 sick in a bowl and raw meat ..lovely .
 
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Lazarus

Lazarus

heretoreaditall2019 said:
Oh ffs a thread, sorry not read it so soz if triggering

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I have a feeling that those who stayed with Jack’s grandad had a very different recollection.
My very own OH stayed in guesthouses in the 90s as a teenager and early 20s in central London.They don’t have quite the same rose tinted recollection as Jack; instead theirs of a horrible series of landlords/landlady’s who had an 8pm curfew of an evening and a 9am ‘all out’ in the morning. In one place, they weren’t allowed to eat in their rooms so they had to basically live on pitta bread, salad or chips from the local takeaway. Tea and toast was the only meal provided. I wouldn’t be surprised if Jack’s papous ran his place in a similarly hospitable way.
 
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Into_the_tunnel

Into_the_tunnel

ChocolateMuffin said:
This is not highs and lows of depression, bipolar (no expert but I think the cycles are too quick...20 minutes sometimes), autism (lol...crank), this is absolute escalating personality disorder or drug use or alcohol use or all of the above.
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There is a diagnosis of rapid cycling seen in bipolar, in which the episodes of mania and depression can occur (in some cases up to) in a daily period.

It is challenging to diagnose and is often confused with the mood instability found in BPD and ADHD.

Not everyone agrees though (as is often the case in MH conditions) and I would never comment here on whether Jack suffers from this. It is far too complex for it to be diagnosed like this.
 
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Rekyavikgirl

Rekyavikgirl

SarcasticEllis said:
Apologies if this isn’t a suitable term, but wasn’t her grandads property a doss-house as opposed to the idyllic b&b she’s suggesting??
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Yes, seaside resorts were where the homeless, itinerant and addicted were sent. There was NOTHING bucolic or wholesome about her grandfather's business model. His prosperity came from housing benefit.
 
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Hollaaa

Hollaaa

SarcasticEllis said:
Apologies if this isn’t a suitable term, but wasn’t her grandads property a doss-house as opposed to the idyllic b&b she’s suggesting??
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Absolutely x

Sorry lads, I think I jinxed the football by wearing my City top out of pettiness to annoy a Liverpool fan I argued with yesterday 🙁. Let that be a lesson to petty people everywhere. And by everywhere, I mean on Twitter. And by on Twitter, I mean Jack 👋.
 
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Valiofthedolls

Valiofthedolls

Sorry for the close up but other than semi-recognizable rinsed beans. what are these other loose things meant to be?! Also, in the bigger pic, that’s her beloved Paxo stuffing mix topping this isn’t it?

The thought of her imaginary guests shoving this in their imaginary pockets made me 🦉 🍾

If most of of these people exist, and any are really forced to eat this (and undercooked belly pork) then that is just a cruelty and an abomination- made worse by the thought of her plonking this down with aplomb and expecting them all to gush over her before they all clapped

ETA close up like this it actually looks like when a blocked garbage disposal unit backs up a load of effluent into the sink (I RENT)
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M

MsGilmore

More slop! I hope SB is at his dad’s eating pizza!
Landslide came on when I was in Tesco. I felt like Jack was watching me spend more than £20! 😳
 
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Valiofthedolls

Valiofthedolls

Soup or Noodle said:
Surely the belly pork won't be served like that. It looks like to fat hasn't even started to render down 🤢
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It’s cos the not-Lorraine team were along to make “hot pan sizzling noises” when she bunged it into a cold pan to ‘cook’ for the requisite 90 seconds before plating it
 
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Lazarus

Lazarus

jenny2603 said:
Anyone familiar with the Kevin Bridges bit about the sleepover from hell (hoose rice) will be aware that poor SB is the Stu Cassidy in this scenario. God help him when the schools go back.
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I went to stay at my sister’s last weekend. She is a literal millionaire and we ordered takeaway. She goes “by the way, it’s hoose rice all the way in here just so you know” 😪
Let me tell you, I ordered a noodle dish instead.
 
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