Jack Monroe #27 Jack's career move after cooking with cans? Who’d have thought it would be OnlyFans?

[Harrybosch]

Hi Jack, I am fairly sure you check in here regularly. I am going to give you some unsolicited advice now, it is coming from a good place, but it is going to be of the 'take no prisoners' variety. While I'm sure you'll disregard it as I am an evil troll, it is well meant.

Shut up about your woes. What you are suffering from is a case of 'being a human'. I will not play misery top trumps with you, but I certainly could, and the truth is it's most likely that the person next to me, and the person next to them, and the person next to them (you see where this is going now, right) could do it too. Sometimes life is hard, sometimes life throws crappy things at you and you know what, that's just what it is. We have all got our baggage, and we could all be drowned in it. It really sucks.

But you know what, it also throws good things at you, all the bleeping time. And you are not getting that. Sure, I've seen posts from you about the positives, but they don't ring true, and when the chips are down you always circle back to the bad stuff. You've got to stop doing that. For your own sake. And something else for free, all that bad stuff, there's things in it that are good. Firstly, and basically, pain teaches us things, even if it's just that we can cope with it, that it builds us, and strengthen us. It teaches us about human kindness when people show it to us when things are tough. It teaches us that, often, humour and laughter and smiles are to be found in everything, every day.

I will give you a personal anecdote here. I was once waiting for an MRI to assess the stage of a cancerous tumour. I was scared, so scared, I was not a big, brave person, I knew I had cancer, but I did not know how bad it was and I did not know what treatments I was going to have to go through, and I was *not* a good, strong cancer patient. I was a nervous wreck. There was a huge backlog for the MRI machine that day, as I'd been raced through to get it done quickly, so my mum and I were sitting for hours in a waiting room. She eventually got out a pack of cards (duck knows *why* my mum had a pack of cards in her handbag, but she is a clever woman) and to the bemusement of everyone around us we started playing knock out whist. Then, eventually, we drew an audience, then a couple of random players, and the whole room was full of people connecting. You know what, I could choose to remember that day as an awful day, and it is my tendency to do that, but I don't, I choose to remember that hour or so, where everyone laughed and the world was ok for a bit. And the bit after, when my mum and I went and sat on a bench in the pretty hospital garden for a bit before we left, and just chatted about plants and gardening and medical students and made up names and lives for them all. The point is, I'm nothing special, I don't have a huge inner strength, or a particularly stunning personality, but everyone can choose to do this. Not be a Pollyanna, but there is always joy if you are prepared to pick that.

I don't see you picking joy. I see you doubling down on whatever sadness there is currently in your life. I'm truly sorry, but there will always be sadness, and it is ok to spend a few hours or a few days dwelling on that (though I would always suggest doing that privately and with people you can trust, the ideal would be with professionals who can guide you through it), but I have learnt, starting when I was so very young, that there is always a possibility for joy and laughter and, it sounds trite, but don't underestimate it, fun, to be had, even in the darkest of days. Fix on that, remember those moments and let the painful ones go. It's harder than I make it sound. I know. The pain will keep coming back, and you can let it in for short periods, but don't wallow, keep on going. Not manically, but calmly, just let the days happen until you wake up one day and realise that there is less pain. However, there's a problem. Pain can be attractive, having it bad can be attractive, you get sympathy, and love, and attention. I know, I've gone in for that too. It's so easy to endlessly recycle pain and never move on from it. I see you doing that and you should stop. Plus, it feels unfair, so you (generic you) focus on that too. 'Why me? Why is it always me?' I can help with that one though. It's not always you, or rather it is, but it's always everyone else too. There's always something, nearly always, and I think the best thing I can say here is that you have to accept it, maybe some level of pain (mental, physical, emotional) is part of the human condition and rather than rail against those parts, accept them (this is dull constant work for me and for most) and celebrate the days that are wonderful as shining lights in your life, rather than your right all the time. We are all of us both not special and incredibly special all at the same time.

Now, to the toughest love part. You're being ungrateful, everyone is sometimes, but you are being especially ungrateful in my, obviously not so humble, opinion. I will compare you to me now, and to millions of other people, I have pain, I have a lot of pain, I also have very limited opportunities. I have to work in a job that I find often dull, it's certainly not what I thought my life would be. I have to do it, because I have bills to pay, on my own, and a child to support. I live in a small house, I struggle often, I don't have any *big* chances to do good. I would like to do some good, but I am short on time and energy to do that once I'm done with the business of living and staying alive. But mostly I have no platform. You, though, you have choices. You have a platform, you have opportunities (please don't tell me that you don't and that you are too much of a maverick, you've written in newspapers, you've been on a daily TV show on BBC1, you have sold many, many books). You have a voice and a career doing something that you apparently love. Those are such huge gifts and I feel like maybe you have lost sight of them, because they are somehow normalised to you now (that's not a criticism, that's just the way of people, we get accustomed to what we have). So, stop using that platform to explain to everyone that your life is hard, I'm happy to accept some of it is, because, as extensively covered, it is for us all. Use it to bring joy, to lift the world up a little bit, and celebrate that good fortune (that, ironically came out of some of your pain, as a lot of good fortune does). Well done on managing that, by the way, now stop cycling back to the pain, and move on. Focus on people having a worse time than you, that helps me, and lift them up. Stop being thirsty, you don't need any more validation, follow that need up in therapy, not online. Stop misery top-trumps, they are awful and they drag *everyone* down. Crack on and be better. Talk about this in therapy. Not what has gone wrong, but how it's made you who you are, and what positives and negative there are from that. Resolve to fix the negatives (even if it feels unfair that you have to do that, I'm afraid it's only you who can). Good luck. It's hard, but you're obviously an intelligent woman, you could do this if you chose to. If you feel you are at rock bottom, then I know it seems unfair to have to do more work, but when could there be a better time to start? Don't recycle behaviours, find new ones.

Ok. That is an essay.

TLR - Jack. Shape up. You're just experiencing life, not some exquisite form of torture only inflicted on you. Make better choices. Go back to therapy. Celebrate your gifts and your opportunities. Stop looking for external validation. For god's sake STOP PLAYING MISERY TOP TRUMPS FROM TODAY. Best of luck.

@Flumps , we can now shut this thread down. You've said it all. Thank you!

 

[choccydigestive]

The red flag for me was the, she left me just after I paid the deposit for the wedding. Making her ex partner look bad.

Whatever reasons her ex had for leaving that was a decision she made and being very publicly dug out like this will probably only serve to make her ex feel that her decision was the correct one.

To be honest, I’m only surprised that this didn’t happen sooner.

Sorry but is anyone paying deposits for anything like that during lockdown when venues have no idea if and when they are reopening? It seems like something you’d def wait to do until life returns to normal considering the economy is so fragile. Just doesn’t make sense to me but what do I know.

 

[OhhBacon]

She is on This Morning. She looks shattered. She is talking about free school meal vouchers.

 

[Peachy9]

She's on this morning right now pleading her poverty!

She is on This Mothing.

She looks bloody knackered. Should have turned off twitter last night

 

[Mustard]

She's been vague booking for weeks, a short neutral statement to say her and her partner had separated would have been more professional. I didn't know they were married.

Gawd she’s now on this morning!

 

[OhhBacon]

She briefly mentioned that she was a Food bank user for 6 months, without those tins and packets she wouldn’t be here but that small amount of food was a life line.
Actually presented well and sounded professional, no weird giggling and the tech worked.

Am genuinely interested in how she spends hours on twitter lamenting her lack of sleep but can’t simply retweet Marcus Rashford‘s campaign or letter yesterday.
It’s like she can’t share the good stuff others are doing.

 

[AmTellinYa]

Hi Jack, I am fairly sure you check in here regularly. I am going to give you some unsolicited advice now, it is coming from a good place, but it is going to be of the 'take no prisoners' variety. While I'm sure you'll disregard it as I am an evil troll, it is well meant.

Shut up about your woes. What you are suffering from is a case of 'being a human'. I will not play misery top trumps with you, but I certainly could, and the truth is it's most likely that the person next to me, and the person next to them, and the person next to them (you see where this is going now, right) could do it too. Sometimes life is hard, sometimes life throws crappy things at you and you know what, that's just what it is. We have all got our baggage, and we could all be drowned in it. It really sucks.

But you know what, it also throws good things at you, all the bleeping time. And you are not getting that. Sure, I've seen posts from you about the positives, but they don't ring true, and when the chips are down you always circle back to the bad stuff. You've got to stop doing that. For your own sake. And something else for free, all that bad stuff, there's things in it that are good. Firstly, and basically, pain teaches us things, even if it's just that we can cope with it, that it builds us, and strengthens us. It teaches us about human kindness when people show it to us when things are tough. It teaches us that, often, humour and laughter and smiles are to be found in everything, every day.

I will give you a personal anecdote here. I was once waiting for an MRI to assess the stage of a cancerous tumour. I was scared, so scared, I was not a big, brave person, I knew I had cancer, but I did not know how bad it was and I did not know what treatments I was going to have to go through, and I was *not* a good, strong cancer patient. I was a nervous wreck. There was a huge backlog for the MRI machine that day, as I'd been raced through to get it done quickly, so my mum and I were sitting for hours in a waiting room. She eventually got out a pack of cards (duck knows *why* my mum had a pack of cards in her handbag, but she is a clever woman) and to the bemusement of everyone around us we started playing knock out whist. Then, eventually, we drew an audience, then a couple of random players, and the whole room was full of people connecting. You know what, I could choose to remember that day as an awful day, and it is my tendency to do that, but I don't, I choose to remember that hour or so, where everyone laughed and the world was ok for a bit. And the bit after, when my mum and I went and sat on a bench in the pretty hospital garden for a bit before we left, and just chatted about plants and gardening and medical students and made up names and lives for them all. The point is, I'm nothing special, I don't have a huge inner strength, or a particularly stunning personality, but everyone can choose to do this. Not be a Pollyanna, but there is always joy if you are prepared to pick that.

I don't see you picking joy. I see you doubling down on whatever sadness there is currently in your life. I'm truly sorry, but there will always be sadness, and it is ok to spend a few hours or a few days dwelling on that (though I would always suggest doing that privately and with people you can trust, the ideal would be with professionals who can guide you through it), but I have learnt, starting when I was so very young, that there is always a possibility for joy and laughter and, it sounds trite, but don't underestimate it, fun, to be had, even in the darkest of days. Fix on that, remember those moments and let the painful ones go. It's harder than I make it sound. I know. The pain will keep coming back, and you can let it in for short periods, but don't wallow, keep on going. Not manically, but calmly, just let the days happen until you wake up one day and realise that there is less pain. However, there's a problem. Pain can be attractive, having it bad can be attractive, you get sympathy, and love, and attention. I know, I've gone in for that too. It's so easy to endlessly recycle pain and never move on from it. I see you doing that and you should stop. Plus, it feels unfair, so you (generic you) focus on that too. 'Why me? Why is it always me?' I can help with that one though. It's not always you, or rather it is, but it's always everyone else too. There's always something, nearly always, and I think the best thing I can say here is that you have to accept it, maybe some level of pain (mental, physical, emotional) is part of the human condition and rather than rail against those parts, accept them (this is dull constant work for me and for most) and celebrate the days that are wonderful as shining lights in your life, rather than your right all the time. We are all of us both not special and incredibly special all at the same time.

Now, to the toughest love part. You're being ungrateful, everyone is sometimes, but you are being especially ungrateful in my, obviously not so humble, opinion. I will compare you to me now, and to millions of other people, I have pain, I have a lot of pain, I also have very limited opportunities. I have to work in a job that I find often dull, it's certainly not what I thought my life would be. I have to do it, because I have bills to pay, on my own, and a child to support. I live in a small house, I struggle often, I don't have any *big* chances to do good. I would like to do some good, but I am short on time and energy to do that once I'm done with the business of living and staying alive. But mostly I have no platform. You, though, you have choices. You have a platform, you have opportunities (please don't tell me that you don't and that you are too much of a maverick, you've written in newspapers, you've been on a daily TV show on BBC1, you have sold many, many books). You have a voice and a career doing something that you apparently love. Those are such huge gifts and I feel like maybe you have lost sight of them, because they are somehow normalised to you now (that's not a criticism, that's just the way of people, we get accustomed to what we have). So, stop using that platform to explain to everyone that your life is hard, I'm happy to accept some of it is, because, as extensively covered, it is for us all. Use it to bring joy, to lift the world up a little bit, and celebrate that good fortune (that, ironically came out of some of your pain, as a lot of good fortune does). Well done on managing that, by the way, now stop cycling back to the pain, and move on. Focus on people having a worse time than you, that helps me, and lift them up. Stop being thirsty, you don't need any more validation, follow that need up in therapy, not online. Stop misery top-trumps, they are awful and they drag *everyone* down. Crack on and be better. Talk about this in therapy. Not what has gone wrong, but how it's made you who you are, and what positives and negative there are from that. Resolve to fix the negatives (even if it feels unfair that you have to do that, I'm afraid it's only you who can). Good luck. It's hard, but you're obviously an intelligent woman, you could do this if you chose to. If you feel you are at rock bottom, then I know it seems unfair to have to do more work, but when could there be a better time to start? Don't recycle behaviours, find new ones.

Ok. That is an essay.

TLDR - Jack. Shape up. You're just experiencing life, not some exquisite form of torture only inflicted on you. Make better choices. Go back to therapy. Celebrate your gifts and your opportunities. Stop looking for external validation. For god's sake STOP PLAYING MISERY TOP TRUMPS FROM TODAY. Best of luck.

I just want to say how brilliantly put and how spot on this is. Also that I think you are simply wonderful x

 

[colouredlines]

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Hi Jack, I am fairly sure you check in here regularly. I am going to give you some unsolicited advice now, it is coming from a good place, but it is going to be of the 'take no prisoners' variety. While I'm sure you'll disregard it as I am an evil troll, it is well meant.

Shut up about your woes. What you are suffering from is a case of 'being a human'. I will not play misery top trumps with you, but I certainly could, and the truth is it's most likely that the person next to me, and the person next to them, and the person next to them (you see where this is going now, right) could do it too. Sometimes life is hard, sometimes life throws crappy things at you and you know what, that's just what it is. We have all got our baggage, and we could all be drowned in it. It really sucks.

But you know what, it also throws good things at you, all the bleeping time. And you are not getting that. Sure, I've seen posts from you about the positives, but they don't ring true, and when the chips are down you always circle back to the bad stuff. You've got to stop doing that. For your own sake. And something else for free, all that bad stuff, there's things in it that are good. Firstly, and basically, pain teaches us things, even if it's just that we can cope with it, that it builds us, and strengthens us. It teaches us about human kindness when people show it to us when things are tough. It teaches us that, often, humour and laughter and smiles are to be found in everything, every day.

I will give you a personal anecdote here. I was once waiting for an MRI to assess the stage of a cancerous tumour. I was scared, so scared, I was not a big, brave person, I knew I had cancer, but I did not know how bad it was and I did not know what treatments I was going to have to go through, and I was *not* a good, strong cancer patient. I was a nervous wreck. There was a huge backlog for the MRI machine that day, as I'd been raced through to get it done quickly, so my mum and I were sitting for hours in a waiting room. She eventually got out a pack of cards (duck knows *why* my mum had a pack of cards in her handbag, but she is a clever woman) and to the bemusement of everyone around us we started playing knock out whist. Then, eventually, we drew an audience, then a couple of random players, and the whole room was full of people connecting. You know what, I could choose to remember that day as an awful day, and it is my tendency to do that, but I don't, I choose to remember that hour or so, where everyone laughed and the world was ok for a bit. And the bit after, when my mum and I went and sat on a bench in the pretty hospital garden for a bit before we left, and just chatted about plants and gardening and medical students and made up names and lives for them all. The point is, I'm nothing special, I don't have a huge inner strength, or a particularly stunning personality, but everyone can choose to do this. Not be a Pollyanna, but there is always joy if you are prepared to pick that.

I don't see you picking joy. I see you doubling down on whatever sadness there is currently in your life. I'm truly sorry, but there will always be sadness, and it is ok to spend a few hours or a few days dwelling on that (though I would always suggest doing that privately and with people you can trust, the ideal would be with professionals who can guide you through it), but I have learnt, starting when I was so very young, that there is always a possibility for joy and laughter and, it sounds trite, but don't underestimate it, fun, to be had, even in the darkest of days. Fix on that, remember those moments and let the painful ones go. It's harder than I make it sound. I know. The pain will keep coming back, and you can let it in for short periods, but don't wallow, keep on going. Not manically, but calmly, just let the days happen until you wake up one day and realise that there is less pain. However, there's a problem. Pain can be attractive, having it bad can be attractive, you get sympathy, and love, and attention. I know, I've gone in for that too. It's so easy to endlessly recycle pain and never move on from it. I see you doing that and you should stop. Plus, it feels unfair, so you (generic you) focus on that too. 'Why me? Why is it always me?' I can help with that one though. It's not always you, or rather it is, but it's always everyone else too. There's always something, nearly always, and I think the best thing I can say here is that you have to accept it, maybe some level of pain (mental, physical, emotional) is part of the human condition and rather than rail against those parts, accept them (this is dull constant work for me and for most) and celebrate the days that are wonderful as shining lights in your life, rather than your right all the time. We are all of us both not special and incredibly special all at the same time.

Now, to the toughest love part. You're being ungrateful, everyone is sometimes, but you are being especially ungrateful in my, obviously not so humble, opinion. I will compare you to me now, and to millions of other people, I have pain, I have a lot of pain, I also have very limited opportunities. I have to work in a job that I find often dull, it's certainly not what I thought my life would be. I have to do it, because I have bills to pay, on my own, and a child to support. I live in a small house, I struggle often, I don't have any *big* chances to do good. I would like to do some good, but I am short on time and energy to do that once I'm done with the business of living and staying alive. But mostly I have no platform. You, though, you have choices. You have a platform, you have opportunities (please don't tell me that you don't and that you are too much of a maverick, you've written in newspapers, you've been on a daily TV show on BBC1, you have sold many, many books). You have a voice and a career doing something that you apparently love. Those are such huge gifts and I feel like maybe you have lost sight of them, because they are somehow normalised to you now (that's not a criticism, that's just the way of people, we get accustomed to what we have). So, stop using that platform to explain to everyone that your life is hard, I'm happy to accept some of it is, because, as extensively covered, it is for us all. Use it to bring joy, to lift the world up a little bit, and celebrate that good fortune (that, ironically came out of some of your pain, as a lot of good fortune does). Well done on managing that, by the way, now stop cycling back to the pain, and move on. Focus on people having a worse time than you, that helps me, and lift them up. Stop being thirsty, you don't need any more validation, follow that need up in therapy, not online. Stop misery top-trumps, they are awful and they drag *everyone* down. Crack on and be better. Talk about this in therapy. Not what has gone wrong, but how it's made you who you are, and what positives and negative there are from that. Resolve to fix the negatives (even if it feels unfair that you have to do that, I'm afraid it's only you who can). Good luck. It's hard, but you're obviously an intelligent woman, you could do this if you chose to. If you feel you are at rock bottom, then I know it seems unfair to have to do more work, but when could there be a better time to start? Don't recycle behaviours, find new ones.

Ok. That is an essay.

TLDR - Jack. Shape up. You're just experiencing life, not some exquisite form of torture only inflicted on you. Make better choices. Go back to therapy. Celebrate your gifts and your opportunities. Stop looking for external validation. For god's sake STOP PLAYING MISERY TOP TRUMPS FROM TODAY. Best of luck.

This post is so similar to conversations I've tried to have with a friend of mine. Think I might have mentioned him on here before at some point, as there are glaring similarities between him and JM. Narcissism being at the centre of it. I am quite good at diplomacy and knowing how to approach a person to get through to them, but I have to say, everytime I've tried with him, from what ever angle, it's resulted in him becoming spiteful towards me or flying off on one. Even suggesting on multiple occasions he may commit suicide (attempting to emotionally manipulate me). He constantly carries the woe is me rhetoric, and even a gentle reminder of all the positives in his life is met with a snarky, passive aggressive response - a la JM.
I can never get through to him and largely give up trying now due to his nasty responses. I suspect that JM's responses would be similar and perhaps that is why we don't see family or friends stepping in. Perhaps they've tried numerous times and it doesn't end well.

 

[Lanie]

I sometimes wonder if she is actually poor or just terrible with money. I have friends who always moan try are poor but in reality they pissed up the wall in clothes and shite the day after pay day and spend the rest of the time eating beans on toast.

 

[choccydigestive]

I have a vague recollection of her *allegedly* posting bragging tweets whenever she did buy something with that money, basically thanking Katie for her new whatever. I remember when I heard that, finding it distasteful and lacking in class.

My interest and sympathy for KH is sub zero, but that is a gross thing to do and say when KH’s kids suffered in the bankruptcy.

 

[PennyLoafer]

Hi Jack, I am fairly sure you check in here regularly. I am going to give you some unsolicited advice now, it is coming from a good place, but it is going to be of the 'take no prisoners' variety. While I'm sure you'll disregard it as I am an evil troll, it is well meant.

Shut up about your woes. What you are suffering from is a case of 'being a human'. I will not play misery top trumps with you, but I certainly could, and the truth is it's most likely that the person next to me, and the person next to them, and the person next to them (you see where this is going now, right) could do it too. Sometimes life is hard, sometimes life throws crappy things at you and you know what, that's just what it is. We have all got our baggage, and we could all be drowned in it. It really sucks.

But you know what, it also throws good things at you, all the bleeping time. And you are not getting that. Sure, I've seen posts from you about the positives, but they don't ring true, and when the chips are down you always circle back to the bad stuff. You've got to stop doing that. For your own sake. And something else for free, all that bad stuff, there's things in it that are good. Firstly, and basically, pain teaches us things, even if it's just that we can cope with it, that it builds us, and strengthens us. It teaches us about human kindness when people show it to us when things are tough. It teaches us that, often, humour and laughter and smiles are to be found in everything, every day.

I will give you a personal anecdote here. I was once waiting for an MRI to assess the stage of a cancerous tumour. I was scared, so scared, I was not a big, brave person, I knew I had cancer, but I did not know how bad it was and I did not know what treatments I was going to have to go through, and I was *not* a good, strong cancer patient. I was a nervous wreck. There was a huge backlog for the MRI machine that day, as I'd been raced through to get it done quickly, so my mum and I were sitting for hours in a waiting room. She eventually got out a pack of cards (duck knows *why* my mum had a pack of cards in her handbag, but she is a clever woman) and to the bemusement of everyone around us we started playing knock out whist. Then, eventually, we drew an audience, then a couple of random players, and the whole room was full of people connecting. You know what, I could choose to remember that day as an awful day, and it is my tendency to do that, but I don't, I choose to remember that hour or so, where everyone laughed and the world was ok for a bit. And the bit after, when my mum and I went and sat on a bench in the pretty hospital garden for a bit before we left, and just chatted about plants and gardening and medical students and made up names and lives for them all. The point is, I'm nothing special, I don't have a huge inner strength, or a particularly stunning personality, but everyone can choose to do this. Not be a Pollyanna, but there is always joy if you are prepared to pick that.

I don't see you picking joy. I see you doubling down on whatever sadness there is currently in your life. I'm truly sorry, but there will always be sadness, and it is ok to spend a few hours or a few days dwelling on that (though I would always suggest doing that privately and with people you can trust, the ideal would be with professionals who can guide you through it), but I have learnt, starting when I was so very young, that there is always a possibility for joy and laughter and, it sounds trite, but don't underestimate it, fun, to be had, even in the darkest of days. Fix on that, remember those moments and let the painful ones go. It's harder than I make it sound. I know. The pain will keep coming back, and you can let it in for short periods, but don't wallow, keep on going. Not manically, but calmly, just let the days happen until you wake up one day and realise that there is less pain. However, there's a problem. Pain can be attractive, having it bad can be attractive, you get sympathy, and love, and attention. I know, I've gone in for that too. It's so easy to endlessly recycle pain and never move on from it. I see you doing that and you should stop. Plus, it feels unfair, so you (generic you) focus on that too. 'Why me? Why is it always me?' I can help with that one though. It's not always you, or rather it is, but it's always everyone else too. There's always something, nearly always, and I think the best thing I can say here is that you have to accept it, maybe some level of pain (mental, physical, emotional) is part of the human condition and rather than rail against those parts, accept them (this is dull constant work for me and for most) and celebrate the days that are wonderful as shining lights in your life, rather than your right all the time. We are all of us both not special and incredibly special all at the same time.

Now, to the toughest love part. You're being ungrateful, everyone is sometimes, but you are being especially ungrateful in my, obviously not so humble, opinion. I will compare you to me now, and to millions of other people, I have pain, I have a lot of pain, I also have very limited opportunities. I have to work in a job that I find often dull, it's certainly not what I thought my life would be. I have to do it, because I have bills to pay, on my own, and a child to support. I live in a small house, I struggle often, I don't have any *big* chances to do good. I would like to do some good, but I am short on time and energy to do that once I'm done with the business of living and staying alive. But mostly I have no platform. You, though, you have choices. You have a platform, you have opportunities (please don't tell me that you don't and that you are too much of a maverick, you've written in newspapers, you've been on a daily TV show on BBC1, you have sold many, many books). You have a voice and a career doing something that you apparently love. Those are such huge gifts and I feel like maybe you have lost sight of them, because they are somehow normalised to you now (that's not a criticism, that's just the way of people, we get accustomed to what we have). So, stop using that platform to explain to everyone that your life is hard, I'm happy to accept some of it is, because, as extensively covered, it is for us all. Use it to bring joy, to lift the world up a little bit, and celebrate that good fortune (that, ironically came out of some of your pain, as a lot of good fortune does). Well done on managing that, by the way, now stop cycling back to the pain, and move on. Focus on people having a worse time than you, that helps me, and lift them up. Stop being thirsty, you don't need any more validation, follow that need up in therapy, not online. Stop misery top-trumps, they are awful and they drag *everyone* down. Crack on and be better. Talk about this in therapy. Not what has gone wrong, but how it's made you who you are, and what positives and negative there are from that. Resolve to fix the negatives (even if it feels unfair that you have to do that, I'm afraid it's only you who can). Good luck. It's hard, but you're obviously an intelligent woman, you could do this if you chose to. If you feel you are at rock bottom, then I know it seems unfair to have to do more work, but when could there be a better time to start? Don't recycle behaviours, find new ones.

Ok. That is an essay.

TLDR - Jack. Shape up. You're just experiencing life, not some exquisite form of torture only inflicted on you. Make better choices. Go back to therapy. Celebrate your gifts and your opportunities. Stop looking for external validation. For god's sake STOP PLAYING MISERY TOP TRUMPS FROM TODAY. Best of luck.

@Flumps, your post needs to be carried in a golden sedan chair from John O'Groats to Land's End until everyone has heard the word. Perceptive, compassionate, wise - and your personal strength shines through in every word XX

 

[maytoseptember]

The “woe is me I just need enough money for a house deposit” appeared in my Twitter TL this morning and really peed me off.

She re-embraced the poverty narrative like a comfort blanket when she broke up with Allegra and moved back to Southend (insinuated that she couldn’t afford heating and so was huddling next to the oven to stay warm at night) and it sounds like she might be going down the same road now Louisa has left.

What about the KH money, Jack? Or the £60k you raised on Kickstarter? The Patreon income? The book advances? The fat cheque from Hellman’s?

It’s funny, she gets away with this tit because even those people that barely know who she is knows that she’s that poverty activist and no one questions why she’s “poor”. Except she isn’t, and if she was shrewd with her cash she could have bought a house years ago.

 

[blurstoftimes]

She briefly mentioned that she was a Food bank user for 6 months, without those tins and packets she wouldn’t be here but that small amount of food was a life line.
Actually presented well and sounded professional, no weird giggling and the tech worked.

Am genuinely interested in how she spends hours on twitter lamenting her lack of sleep but can’t simply retweet Marcus Rashford‘s campaign or letter yesterday.
It’s like she can’t share the good stuff others are doing.

Without those tins and packets she quite literally wouldn’t be here because those 6 months of poverty are her only bloody USP! It really annoys me that she, someone who sits in Groucho club hurling abuse at Jude Law, is still the self-appointed spokesperson for poverty in the UK. Her grasp of politics seems about on the level of a politically engaged first year International Relations student. duck off jack.

 

[Bellybutton lint]

Her partner is successful, earing a decent salary, yet wasn't willing to pay for a wedding deposit? Or at least go halves? Clue right there that she didn't want to get married yet.

Probably a few months in, didn't want to get married period.

 

[Flumps]

@Flumps , we can now shut this thread down. You've said it all. Thank you!

Nooooooooo!!! We must maintain the cabal!

 

[Yel]

It's strange how little promo she did for the book in the media, just a this morning slot and an interview on virgin radio.

Usually with a book someone would have loads of TV, newspaper and radio appearances. Could many places have turned her down? Super easy to do 50+ interviews / slots while at home.

It's down to #600 on Amazon for the paperback and #8000 for the eBook. So it's not selling many copies at all.

 

[Bellybutton lint]

So it's not selling many copies at all.

*Sniffle* the deprecipes are not going down well.

 

[lipsticktaser]

I sometimes wonder if she is actually poor or just terrible with money. I have friends who always moan try are poor but in reality they pissed up the wall in clothes and shite the day after pay day and spend the rest of the time eating beans on toast.

I think she's just tit with money. Anyone who is apparently on living wage and buys two burberry coats is tit with money. Plus she's had wealthy girlfriends for a while, so really hasn't had to worry. Didn't she say she spent and exorbitant amount of the family budget on books.
I get it. I'm tit with money too. I have no idea what our bills are. I'm in a bit of debt from a long manic stage that I ignored. I finally admitted it to my husband and we're sorting it.
Well, I say we. I get a 'wage' every month. From that I pay my debt, run my car and buy clothes etc for myself. The idea being I need to learn to budget. I'm not running a house but it's been a year and I've finally got money left at the end of the month. I've paid off the highest interest credit card and I'm out my overdraft. I now know, if I needed to, I could budget.


Anyhoooo - I've been volunteering so haven't been as active. It's all kicking off. Agent Provocateurs and more JM bullshit. It's quite refreshing to have some form of consistency during lockdown. That being the sheer cuntyness of JM. I'm glad Nims got her book.

Love to everyone who is having a bit of a tit time. I hope the sun breaks through the clouds for you soon.