Jack Monroe #26 Jack be bitter, Jack be quick, Jack stop being such a dick.

[Harrybosch]

Morning fraus. Had an awful sleep, full of anxiety dreams, the usual stuff, spiders, faceless demons chasing me ugh. But a sinister Jack also made an appearance, coming for me on Instagram! My head is a noisy, overactive mess when my anxiety is bad, but I've realised this morning there's something I do find unsettling about her... Probably her vitriol and threatening talk TBF.
Anyway I think she's a bigger nob now for daring to infiltrate my dreams

I feel for you. I had crazy dreams, a particularly lengthy one involving an ex-boyfriend. He was great in bed, so by all rights it should have been a sex dream, but no, it was me begging him to get back together with me, while he kept saying no, he was happier without me.

Why does my subconscious want to crush me when I'm asleep? It's not even what happened in reality, plus I've now been happily married for more than a decade. I guess it's not just Jack who has a maverick mind.

Oh God, I forgot about the jar lid rubbing

#neverforget

 

[emm]

Badly bullied and harassed by a group of obsessive online strangers.

Leave out the detail. Job done. Sympathy for jack. After two years of painstaking investment in growing her hair no less.

Hot dog sandwiches are the answer.

Always so melodramatic but without any concrete detail, so the meds cause hair loss but it is actually a result of stress, not the meds? And “huge unmentionable “ work stress, what this means for most people, especially atm is not having work. Jesus wept

I feel for you. I had crazy dreams, a particularly lengthy one involving an ex-boyfriend. He was great in bed, so by all rights it should have been a sex dream, but no, it was me begging him to get back together with me, while he kept saying no, he was happier without me.

Why does my subconscious want to crush me when I'm asleep? It's not even what happened in reality, plus I've now been happily married for more than a decade. I guess it's not just Jack who has a maverick mind.


#neverforget

Bad dreams are the worst, you wake up and don’t feel at all rested it’s terrible. Mine have been worse in lockdown I think

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Badly bullied and harassed by a group of obsessive online strangers.

Leave out the detail. Job done. Sympathy for jack. After two years of painstaking investment in growing her hair no less.

Hot dog sandwiches are the answer.

Yeah there's nothing like working your way through a jar of mechanically recovered meat for days to make you feel better (the jarred ones usually are shite).
Piss off Jack

 

[Breakdance Badass]

Ahhh I’ve just watched the beginning of the Insta Live, what a bloody shitshow. What the duck was the Dad story? Who needs cue cards to retell a (boring) story about their own Dad?

 

[Motherwellgirl]

I don’t really like Hellmans mayo. The vegan one is a very decent effort but Aldi promoted a range of vegan mayo and mustards on special a few months ago and they were brilliant.

Inspired vegan. Only been able to find them on eBay since but really lovely. They do vegan hollandaise as well. I bought loads of them as the Aldi price was excellent compared to buying online.

 

[emm]

Ahhh I’ve just watched the beginning of the Insta Live, what a bloody shitshow. What the duck was the Dad story? Who needs cue cards to retell a (boring) story about their own Dad?

She always has these emotional backstories, remember she always did on dkl as well? Cannot for the life of me remember any of them though

 

[Motherwellgirl]

She always has these emotional backstories, remember she always did on dkl as well? Cannot for the life of me remember any of them though

I didn’t watch DKL but there was the one about painstakingly re creating her dads home made Chinese curry working 20 hour days to achieve the recipe only to find out the curry sauce was in fact .......

Drumroll please ............

Made from a jar.

 

[my_escape_from_the_ads]

What an opening!! Love the mystery high-pitched squeak - and that jar lid sure needed a good rubbing. I half expected to see Nurse Ratched appear.


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Omg “you’re on” is like something out of a horror movie !!!

 

[Cookiecookie]

Nice calling your pussycat a prick. JM it is you who is the prick!

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I call the dog a furry moron. He knocked out the entire back security screen door the other day, because I tried to shut it so I could brush him Thankfully, I have lived in a truly crappy house, which had a sliding bathroom door which would fall off constantly, so I'm pretty good at getting them back on.

 

[my_escape_from_the_ads]

Always so melodramatic but without any concrete detail, so the meds cause hair loss but it is actually a result of stress, not the meds? And “huge unmentionable “ work stress, what this means for most people, especially atm is not having work. Jesus wept


Bad dreams are the worst, you wake up and don’t feel at all rested it’s terrible. Mine have been worse in lockdown I think

So have mine !! I actually had a dream about a massive spider falling from the ceiling into my bath last week.. and woke myself up screaming and I was trying to move backward in the bed.

 

[Bellybutton lint]

Yeah there's nothing like working your way through a jar of mechanically recovered meat for days to make you feel better (the jarred ones usually are shite).
Piss off Jack

My old boy pictures her food and kitchen as ptomaine palace. He also mentioned that no handwashing going on either. Grim. I would not eat anything she slopped together, no matter how hungry I was.

 

[Harrybosch]

So have mine !! I actually had a dream about a massive spider falling from the ceiling into my bath last week.. and woke myself up screaming and I was trying to move backward in the bed.

ARgh, spider dreams are the worst. My dreams have been so much worse since lockdown began. I feel for everyone who is experiencing the same. It makes me feel quite exhausted even though I'm barely doing anything.

 

[Bellybutton lint]

So have mine !! I actually had a dream about a massive spider falling from the ceiling into my bath last week.. and woke myself up screaming and I was trying to move backward in the bed.

The worst dreams I ever had was quitting smoking (still have the odd one) and used the nicotine patches. I had the worst dreams, being chased by a pack of giant penises, tied to a tree and slapped about the head by said giant penises. Arkkk. They were filthy dreams and so vivid.

 

[Starsanddaggers]

We call our cat a furry thug.

Mostly because despite being spayed he batters the tit out of every other tom cat in our quiet, picturesque village.
The neighbours must hate us

 

[Bellybutton lint]

We call our cat a furry thug.

Mostly because despite being spayed he batters the tit out of every other tom cat in our quiet, picturesque village.
The neighbours must hate us

I love my furry boys Fred and Barney. Both loons and an absolute joy. Fred is the adventurer, always on the go and Barney is the diva.

And yes it is exhausting, I feel like death today.

Oh you poor thing. Have a hug xx

Superfan still hasn't mentioned getting her book. I hope she gets it today. She also tweeted she is giving blood again, the 27th time she has. Bless her and her kind heart.

Oh god that awful curry, how she dared to call it Chinese I will never know

It looked like something that came out of a Felix cat food pouch.

 

[Nottonightbabe]

ARgh, spider dreams are the worst. My dreams have been so much worse since lockdown began. I feel for everyone who is experiencing the same. It makes me feel quite exhausted even though I'm barely doing anything.

My worst spider one I get is being in a room with really a low ceiling and I look up and there's loads of house spiders and cobwebs all over the ceiling, getting in my hair .
And yes it is exhausting, I feel like death today.

 

[emm]

I didn’t watch DKL but there was the one about painstakingly re creating her dads home made Chinese curry working 20 hour days to achieve the recipe only to find out the curry sauce was in fact .......

Drumroll please ............

Made from a jar.

Oh god that awful curry, how she dared to call it Chinese I will never know

So have mine !! I actually had a dream about a massive spider falling from the ceiling into my bath last week.. and woke myself up screaming and I was trying to move backward in the bed.

Omg I have had similar and jolted awake, just as I was getting to sleep

 

[emm]

Superfan still hasn't mentioned getting her book. I hope she gets it today. She also tweeted she is giving blood again, the 27th time she has. Bless her and her kind heart.


It looked like something that came out of a Felix cat food pouch.

Specifically those soup ones that are really liquid

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Not sure what’s more wretch inducing, the way she writes or her interspecies hygiene

 

[emm]

Superfan still hasn't mentioned getting her book. I hope she gets it today. She also tweeted she is giving blood again, the 27th time she has. Bless her and her kind heart.


It looked like something that came out of a Felix cat food pouch.

I a, so angry about this superfan thing, I couldn’t care less about her bitching falsely about us but to treat her fans badly is just