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[Ninch55]

That's wallpaper? Genuinely thought it was a kid's drawing.

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I count 7 baskets - a mere £45 - bargain…

 

[Toffee finger]

So have just done an estimate on her revenue for 2021 - this isn’t straight forward but please bear with the explanation of it and as you read the bullets look at the table to help visualise! Excel phobic fraus pls join us on this journey and rest assured we will guide you through it!

So we factually know how many subscribers she had per month - what we don’t know is which payment tier they’re on or the platform fee Patreon are charging her. There’s also more complex shit like annuals get discounted but I see that as going in the vague estimate of avg monthly sub?

Because we don’t know these two we can take a look at a range of values and decide the assumptions that fit for us. So along the columns we’re applying different patreon fees, with 12% being the very highest according to their documentation and I’d assume for the big boys raking in tens of thousands a month?

Along the rows we have different avg subscription values, from the absolute minimum of £3.50 up to a hugely generous £20.00.

So let’s run through some scenarios:
* The absolute bare minimum she’d have received last year is £10.7k, assuming everyone is on the cheapest tier of £3.50 and Patreon are charging their highest fee of 12%
* Moving along the blue row you can see how a change in rates would effect her take home, if she’s on the cheapest rate of 2% she takes home £11.9k
* Going all the way up to the most £££ assumption that the average sub is £20 per month, this would mean taking home £61.2k - £68.2k per year.
* Personally for me, I think the truth lives somewhere in the grey. I think her audience are affluent enough that an avg sub of around a tenner makes sense and I’d imagine that she’d only be subject to minimal fees, so a take home of £25k - £34k from this makes sense.

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Ps can we pls discuss how ducking annoying the ads are when trying to do a long post????

Thank you for making it clear and easy to read.

So it’s fairly reasonable to think her rent is fully covered by Patreon subs. Madness

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Sorry. But what kitchen stuff would you put in those baskets?

Ugh. The twitch.

 

[Captainmouse]

OH MY GOD HER LATEST POST!!! This is what she calls decluttering??

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I mean she’s so short of cutlery
Don’t let @MancBee see that

 

[Mr Krabs]

I spy a fancy Nespresso Creatista machine with integrated milk frother. I have one (fancy) and bought at Argos. It was nearly £350. I might add that this was bought by my partner who wanted one for when he stays. I'd make do with Tesco instant.

Though for Jack to have one is a bit odd. It seems a lot for someone to pay for a coffee machine when they don't drink coffee.

ETA what good it the toaster (that she doesn't have) being on the shelf (that is falling off the wall)?
And is that a new toaster? It doesn't have naff writing all over it to tell you it's a toaster for making toast.

Yeah I think the coffee machine is this one: https://ao.com/product/sne800btr-ne...a-plus-pod-coffee-machine-black-65992-64.aspx

It’s £430.

Four
Hundred
And
Thirty
Quid

I love coffee. My veins are mostly flowing with caffeine and I would not spend nearly that much on a machine.

But myyyyy foreeveeerrrrr hoooommmeeeeee. Can’t afford butttteeeeeeerrrrrr.

 

[MooBelle]

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The big cupboard is for putting the ironing board and hoover in.
Idiot.

 

[Yorkiepud]

Why would the white/cream kitchen make her depressed yet dyeing all her clothes black(ish) improved her mood?

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

I have been thinking about this over the past few days.

Jack is keeping this information to herself as she thinks it is angering the Cabal. The kitten and Dash are more than likely doing OK and Jack is sniggering away at the thought of us worrying.

She really is that deranged; In my opinion m'lord. Though to be fair, I'm not medically trained to give a diagnosis of a mental disorder, so it is pure speculation based on Jack's deranged behaviour.

I agree, Narcs will play mind games, they have to have the uppermost and wield the power.

Spoiler: But

Rabbits are not very hardy. They die easily and suddenly due to neglect all too often. It can happen to well cared for rabbits too. Rabbits also have a really delicate digestive system which can turn fatal if their gut stops working (due to poor diet, stress, fear). The way Jack kept Dash in a tiny enclosure in a dark, damp garage would have induced stress, fear if there was a fox or monster Maine Coon and we have the video that shows the improper diet.
I think the complete lack of footage/photography and the repeat airing of that video point towards something sadder.

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

AND she has a huge dining room. Plus the rest

So… she needs a place to prep
a place to store food and useful things
a place to cook
a place to photograph food
a place to clean up
a place for recipe writing

Yep. Not going to happen in that lovely bright space.

 

[traumatised sideboard]

Incredible craftsmanship Sidey B, have you considered mass production and selling them framed? I choose to believe you had already made that at some previous point in time and now you're thrilled you finally have an opportunity to whip it out for the cabal like a tit in diva.pdf.

 

[MancBee]

That's wallpaper? Genuinely thought it was a kid's drawing.

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I spy a fancy Nespresso Creatista machine with integrated milk frother. I have one (fancy) and bought at Argos. It was nearly £350. I might add that this was bought by my partner who wanted one for when he stays. I'd make do with Tesco instant.

Though for Jack to have one is a bit odd. It seems a lot for someone to pay for a coffee machine when they don't drink coffee.

ETA what good it the toaster (that she doesn't have) being on the shelf (that is falling off the wall)?
And is that a new toaster? It doesn't have naff writing all over it to tell you it's a toaster for making toast.

 

[Django]

Jack's kitchen is twice the size of mine. The difference being I'm grateful for mine because I worked hard to get it.

The idea that she can't get any work done in a kitchen of this size is ridiculous. If you've got too much stuff a) you have money and b) a clear hoarding issue.

The only degree she has a chance of obtaining is one in advanced bullshittery.

P.S. She's also a grief vulture, sticking her beak into the local election for no good reason

This is all further proof that Jack has no idea how a restaurant or professional kitchen works, they are usually teeny and every inch is planned to create a flow and keep any other space for tables, which is where the money is made.

 

[veryfondoftea]

Her decorative style makes me want to throw myself to floor and wail. Why baskets in the kitchen? Won't they get greasy? Ditto the rug. Fairy lights over the back door?!!!!!! Helllllllppp

 

[Veronicaaa]

Serious question(s): doesn't she have any actual work to do? and then secondly, if the answer to the first part is no, then how does she afford to pay rent?!

She gets a large wedge of cash from her Patreon every month, for doing nothing (she doesn't send out any of the stuff she's meant to). I do wonder if LJC is still footing half the bill for the RENTED house.

 

[Powershower]

Her degree is going well then. Must be well on her way to a third doctorate by now. Those tassel baskets are vile btw. They look like something a snake would appear out of if you played a flute near it but with frumpy accoutrements. It gives off strong hot air balloon basket vibes as well.

Also it's fucking CANNELLINI you gormless bean-rinser. C-A-N-N-E-L-L-I-N-I. Two Ls, for Louisa Left.

it's CANNELLINI you gormless bean-rinser. C-A-N-N-E-L-L-I-N-I. Two Ls, for Louisa Left.


Thread title nom!!!

 

[Ispyabudgetbeanblogger]

Apart from everything else, isn't it weird to do a naked streak round the house when your pre-teen son is in?

It's so weird. I'm no prude, but my son at that age stared to find it uncomfortable to see me naked. That is normal, healthy and needs to be respected. Running around the house naked is beyond weird, especially around a 'housemate' and a preteen child.

 

[Veronicaaa]

I wonder if this is what she's trying to pitch for?

(note the capitalisation of Sort Out)

 

[Orphan_Black]

Ffs. My draining board is to the left. It has been for 5 years.

You live with it. Unless you have a millionty pounds to have a perfect fecking kitchen designed for you you live with what you have.

Piss off.

Being left handed, I'd love my draining board to be on the left, it's on the right though. Should I start howling?

I am going a bit green at the gills thinking about the layer of grease that is definitely all over her kitchen.

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Theme: where are my tree pictures.

 

[PortiaControl]

Just caught up with @heretoreaditall2019 's excellent update on last year's Patreon FACTS. Thank you so much for that dear heart. It's just absolutely mind boggling that people are paying for her to do f all.

I feel like recently she's not even attempting to make out that she's even working. Nothing about the ridiculously overdue books, no "writing" selfies or TV appearances. She hasn't been on a podcast for a while and at one point it felt like she was on podcast after podcast. She just posts about her lunch and what she's been "sorting" at home. It's blatantly obvious that she's using the Patreon cash to fund a life of leisure. WHY CAN'T THE SQUIGS SEE THIS??!!