Jack Monroe #221 She is the antichrist of nourishment

[Lanie]

I thought we knew detective Harry Bosch was now undercover?
Also I’m grunking but why make sticky toffee pudding with PRUNES it’s DATES

Aren't they the same thing I mean theyre brownish black aren't they so same.

 

[MarzBarzie]

My vet sends post in the animals names. I love it.

Your pet can read? Don’t tell Jack or she’ll invent a cat library or something!

 

[Jelly Bean]

What is this, and why is it so dirty? And why would you want a postcard of it? Let alone 10!

If you were the recipient of that postcard you would assume it was a sinister warning.
'Tonight you sleep with the sloppies'.

 

[EllaEm87]

Your pet can read? Don’t tell Jack or she’ll invent a cat library or something!

Oh yes, they open the post themselves

But yes their post comes “Maisie Em” “Nala Em” or “Paddy Em” …. Is it illegal to open your pets post for them?

 

[Captainmouse]

Eeuuwww awful. It looks like something from a slaughterhouse or crime scene
No idea what the two circular things are. Thankfully.

Ashtrays?

 

[HotesTilaire]

I think tit day was the worst day of 2021.

It’s always the build up that’s better than the actual thing

 

[ChickenPorridge]

I know earlier I said "release the slop" but J*ysus Lord F*ck, I didn't mean brown trifle made in a revolting old light fitting. Everytime you think you can no longer be shocked and appalled. I can't even laugh, it's SO grim

 

[HotesTilaire]

I have reverse engineered this trifle and I can confirm the layers are as follows

1st Jellied eels
2nd Mayonnaise
3rd Sour cream
Sprinkled with herring caviar.


Happy Christmas.

Merry mancmass to you too.
This grunk is wild, first Bugsy Monroe with a tit and a splurge gun, then ashtray light fitting trifle. And just as the ninnys are trying to work out what’s in the trifle Jack deploys the floof and tweets -coincidentally? I don’t think so- about slugs!
Slug trifle man, I know trifle isn’t usually vegetarian but this time I’m happy to just have a kitkat

 

[Lanie]

If you were the recipient of that postcard you would assume it was a sinister warning.
'Tonight you sleep with the sloppies'.

That knife is like something out of a museum. It's ancient and looks every one of its years.

 

[BananaSmith]

Oh yes, they open the post themselves

But yes their post comes “Maisie Em” “Nala Em” or “Paddy Em” …. Is it illegal to open your pets post for them?

Yes, absolutely x

 

[TraceyJacks]

It looks like she was emptying her hoover and a celestial gust spirited the contents over the top.

 

[BananaSmith]

Aren't they the same thing I mean theyre brownish black aren't they so same.

Are you Jack?

 

[HotesTilaire]

Triiiiifle? In an ashtray?
Old chief liked his trifle in a clean glass bowl, it’s the way it’s always been.

 

[traumatised sideboard]

Sweet dreams, Jack.

 

[Boyo]

What is this, and why is it so dirty? And why would you want a postcard of it? Let alone 10!

Study of ashtray, burrata with ash, and stinking bloody knife. JM by JackMonroe (for J Monroe by Mx Jack Monroe)

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

I already thought she was a cheeky wee troglodyte for daring to critique some gorgeous looking trifles while she was flashing about that bowl of dream-topping-capped sadness, but this grey asbestos nightmare is an abomination. The absolute gall of someone who makes food both hideous and tasteless sneering at the creations of chefs, food writers and home economists, all with more training, knowledge and passion than a narc like her could ever hope to achieve. The lack of self awareness is just…

I'm nominating this for you know what.

 

[kachoochoo]

I call this "sexy moon, rusty cleaver, inkwell"

that'll be £10 please

 

[Ennui]

I have a recipe for a one ingredient Yule Log.




Go to Tesco, buy a Yule Log (other premade brands are available, I just live near Tesco)

De-lurking to say I really thought this was going somewhere else at first!

 

[HotesTilaire]

Whilst I agree that Allegra does seem like she wants to actually eat Jack up, I still feel in my waters that she’s a decent person. I think she was head over heels, certainly in lust and I think she did some of the heavy lifting in Jacks early works and been very generous in not taking Jack out, ever since.

 

[Saint_clemmie]

Whilst I agree that Allegra does seem like she wants to actually eat Jack up, I still feel in my waters that she’s a decent person. I think she was head over heels, certainly in lust and I think she did some of the heavy lifting in Jacks early works and been very generous in not taking Jack out, ever since.

I can't say either way on Allegra because I have an automatic suspicion of anyone closely associated with Jack, however, most of us had cringe social media usage pre-2010 I feel so can let her off for those flirty tweets even if they were vomit-inducing.