Jack Monroe #206 I wouldn’t trust her with a spam fritter

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Sorry to drag the conversation back, but why (they didn't of course) would a grammar school in a fairly wealthy part of Essex employ one of these for Jack (who still can't spell thank you).
 
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Someone alert the Italians. It’s jollof rice all over again!

It’s not cacio e pepe if you’ve stuck loads of other shit in it, Jack. Just, for once, do something classic without bastardising it, I beg you.

Christ.
 
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We’re lucky that the cacio e pepe part of this dish wasn’t rinsed hoops with POBP and a smartprice cheese triangle Jack seems to think any pasta with obligatory black pepper and cheese deserves a FANCY name
 
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Another made up character is the ASDA boss who she later saw stacking her books.

The head of year who said she would amount to nothing.

lipstick lady doctor?
 
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The Local Authority employs Ed Psychs so that’s how Jack could have accessed one.
ETA AFAIK they’re not employed to come to the house and make an assessment of autism which is then deliberately withheld
 
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I actually think this looks like one of her more decent efforts but either describe the whole dish in Italian or none of it. It’s like when people say stuff like ‘aloo gobi with chickpeas’. Stop it.
 
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Someone alert the Italians. It’s jollof rice all over again!

It’s not cacio e pepe if you’ve stuck loads of other shit in it, Jack. Just, for once, do something classic without bastardising it, I beg you.

Christ.
remember anything can be anything can be anything EXCEPT jack’s dad’s shitty trifle . That’s sacred.
 
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Its pasta and cheese with green goop and orange juice that she didnt strain.

Guess she didnt fancy beans today or eggs. Shocker
 
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I actually think this looks like one of her more decent efforts
I was going to say that can't really go wrong with a plate of pasta, but then I remembered the lingreenie.

ETA Poca got there ahead of me, dammit!
 
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I did wonder when they did the cabbage dish and started talking about air miles and local brassica if we would get Environment Jack. And it would appear we have. Who-bloody-hoo
 
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Lest we forget we had self washing hair Jack a few months ago, which would suggest her eco/off-grid persona has been fermenting like a slow-cooker full of PG Tips for a few months now.
 
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Another made up character is the ASDA boss who she later saw stacking her books.

The head of year who said she would amount to nothing.

lipstick lady doctor?
Not forgetting the chap who sidled up to her in a supermarket, leaned over and whispered in her ear that she was his hero (or some such shit)
 
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Eco Jack is an all too easy identity to co-opt
-no car
- “second-hand” and charity shop/puddle finds
-shit upcycling of tins
- salt is salt spa bath milk bottle treat
-everything cooked all day in a slow cooker/no lightbulbs saving electric
-saves yellow stickerfood from landfill

Bot help us Fraus
 
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Ironic on that last point that she also makes yellow sticker food look like landfill.
 
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