Jack Monroe #199 Just mind-bogglingly, gobsmackingly stupid

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I'm still waiting on her recipe for Irish Stewvlaki
Bad form to quote myself but the recipe for Irish Stewvaki?

Take one tin of gently rinsed stewed beef in gravy, a drained tin of carrots and another of drained tinned potatoes. Spear alternate pieces of beef, carrot and potato onto skewers, marinate with oil (no need to splash out on olive), dried herbs (any) and bottled lemon juice.

serve at room temperature (it's the Greek way)
 
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Crack a raw egg in and eat it straight from the saucepan like a greedy goblin.
 
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Oh god. Positive, caring, happy clappy, engagement-upping Jack is possibly the most disingenuous of all Jacks.

Namaste understanding Jack is infuriating.
It reminds me of when my husband, usually incredibly argumentative and shouty at the world, decides to be patient and tolerant, with a sort of fond and bemused smile at everything. He does it to be annoying and it works every single time
Jack's forced zen has exactly the same effect.
 
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Oh God, my husband is like that! Always makes me wonder what he wants.
*sound of tip jar rattling*
 
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I'm just sad we never got to see the full horrors of that T&G haircut. She promised it would get an airing and then SHE LEFT again. Unless she's filmed something...

Slopgod take the wheel
 
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It creeps me out but I can't put a finger on why. Sort of like the way cult leaders freak you out.

eta: i bet she either doesn't blink enough or blinks far too much
It creeps me out, too and in my case I don't like this kind of positivity crap in general, it is all really an old trick, just like recycling/frugal Jack and with everything she does it simply gives off disingenous vibes.

... just like Jack they both started out as *cough* photographer.
 
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No overnight chaos then? Perhaps another reappearance on Sunday once her son has returned to his father. (an assumption your honour) Between then and before she returns to rehab, or wherever it is that doesn't allow phones.

I'm sure her son was pleased that he was third on her list of things to be grateful for, behind waking up and her friends.
 
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I don't think it's family. They created the monster that is Monroe, I doubt very much she'd listen to them at all. I think @MancBee is probably closer to the truth, in that it's someone trying to prevent or stall a legal chaos.
Agreed.
There's something coming up and she needs to 'prove' she's not a nightmare on Twitter.
Radio silence is impossible for her so this is definitely enforced. LJC is almost certainly assisting but doubtful it is her idea. Jack sees her as lower than her (Narcs see family as extended versions of themselves so Louisa would have to do Jack's bidding or face a Narc tantrum)
She definitely got hold of the phone when Louisa was at the kickyball. There was no one to stop her manically tweeting that night. She was sweetness and light, even to those who challenged her. Then it ended abruptly. Almost like someone realised she was tweeting and went round to take it off her.
 
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Christ alive, these people.

I suppose it’s honest....just missed off Patreon and Buy Me A Coffee.

Scrounging fucks.
That's so funny. I bet Jack isn't at all pleased about it. She thinks she's a lot more subtle about her grifting.
 
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You are my Slopbot
My only Slopbot
You make me happy
When hairs go grey.
You'll never know dear heart
How much I (g)rate you
Please don't take
My Slopbot
Away.
 
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As an encore, Jack appears on a balcony, high up over a crowd of Cabal members. There's also a few interested journalists clutching trifles who have started to question the backstory of the poverty. She bursts into a rendition of a reworked well known song, made famous by the Gay icon Madge.

Don't cry for me, Cabal members
The truth is
Louisa left me

because of my wild ways
On Daily Kitchen
I wouldn't promise
To keep my distance

And as for fortune
And as for fame
I've tried to invite them in

Though it seemed
On that Hellsite
They weren't what I desired.

Have I said too much?
There's so much more I want to say to you.
Problem is
Not a word of it is truth.
 
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I’ve been watching my football team live all over the country, the rest of Europe and even world wide for over 40 years and I’ve just referred to it as kickyball in real life. You mithering ninnies!
 
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Not being funny, full moon, but @Marj24 just invented Irish Stewvlaki, you can’t tell me that’s just a co-incidence.
 
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Apolos if this has already been discussed not fully up to date, Trifle defender on her best shade game...

 
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I’ve been watching my football team live all over the country, the rest of Europe and even world wide for over 40 years and I’ve just referred to it as kickyball in real life. You mithering ninnies!
My greatest fear! I hope you are ok dear heart!
 
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