Jack Monroe #194 She only came back cos we were about to put out an album

[ThunderClapForCapers]

Ohh Mel Donte getting one last twist of the knife in before her contract is up?
That poll

dunno about winning the outfit, but del monte have posted their mascots at Queens 2 years ago. poor buggers

Maybe after a few teething problems, Del Monte and Jack have really found their niche. Could this be the new salaried position that she has been busy stitching together behind the scenes?

Next poll - In her biggest role since standing in for Ruby Rose, would you like to see Brand Ambassador Jack Monroe play our 2021 Pineapple or Banana?

 

[traumatised sideboard]

The poll, I'm cackling. Whoever's in charge of Del Monte's social media must be on a kamikaze mission to run this campaign into the ground. I agree that it's not even close to her worst effort, it really doesn't look that bad when you consider that she's had a proper physical book published by a legitimate company that includes a recipe mixing mandarins with pasta. It doesn't even look like it was photographed on the porch floor next to her sweaty filthy clompers! Only the finest for Del Monte.

 

[Orphan_Black]

Maybe after a few teething problems, Del Monte and Jack have really found their niche. Could this be the new salaried position that she has been busy stitching together behind the scenes?

Next poll - In her biggest role since standing in for Ruby Rose, would you like to see Brand Ambassador Jack Monroe play our 2021 Pineapple or Banana?


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Definitely the pineapple, unzip it and watch all the tampons fall out

 

[Lanie]

Why couldn’t they have just asked something like “have you tried this yet, yes or no?”. I almost feel sorry for them.

Haven't voted and don't intend to but perhaps there checking too see how wel the Collab is going ? My guess is not well but I do kind of hope none of us had a hand in if too see what numbers actually came up?!

 

[PortiaControl]

Full time meals are getting some of the ENGLAND KICKYBALL PLAYERS to do the cook off this week. During an international tournament (I know they have probably pre recorded it)

But will they be dancing around the kitchen wearing heels??? That's what I want to know.

P.S. I can't believe we were actually entertaining the idea that she might be on Strictly at one point because of her exaggerations.

 

[Candytuft]

Maybe it’s just me, but thinking about salads. Now, I get that there are combinations of things that you wouldn’t think of that make a tasty salad and there could be a book in it.
But it’s not cooking. Requires no skill whatsoever and you would think that nobody could bugger up a salad.
Anyway back to Jack.

 

[Cookiecookie]

Maybe it’s just me, but thinking about salads. Now, I get that there are combinations of things that you wouldn’t think of that make a tasty salad and there could be a book in it.
But it’s not cooking. Requires no skill whatsoever and you would think that nobody could bugger up a salad.
Anyway back to Jack.

I'm not sure Jack's pickled beans are ever going to be in a tasty salad!

 

[MancBee]

But will they be dancing around the kitchen wearing heels??? That's what I want to know.

What they do in their own homes is none of our business.

Though to be fair it is long overdue for a first division footballer to come out as gay. By the law of averages there must be some.

ETA Backtracking now. Not that I'm suggesting that you have to be gay to wear heels. In my experience, even the most masculine of men, gay or straight, like to try on a pair of stilettos.

 

[Candytuft]

Quite a few of our rugby players have come out. I can only think of one who made the news. How times have changed in my lifetime thank goodness.
Imagine in fantasy world Jack would go on strictly and learn stuff, take on board criticism and strive to improve. Work hard, put the hours in and acknowledge the efforts of her mentor.

 

[ScamSandwich]

Since we know Jack's not going to be back until the weekend, here is my pre-chaos/crushing tedium gift to the cabal (my taxi driver's waiting outside). Pie Jesu, it's the most uptempo requiem ever made to honour the forgotten freezer fish. Get out those Russell Brands, it's what god himself would have wanted

O.M.G !!! Excellent, excellent work!!!
You outdid yourself when I thought it could not get any better.
More lungs to hoot up than I have got. Listened to this last night and the walls were practically shaking because of my laughter.
RIP fishoes, you are with the angels and glovegeons now.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Haven't voted and don't intend to but perhaps there checking too see how wel the Collab is going ? My guess is not well but I do kind of hope none of us had a hand in if too see what numbers actually came up?!

Agreed - after what she did to Essex girl she’ll never get my viewing figure again tbh, before it was a fair value exchange of our communal lols for a reasonable viewing figure for her - but for her to monetise us then go for one of us in such a spiteful way?! She’s a head

 

[HotesTilaire]

To be fair I think the viggle network are probably still unhappy with Mackie as well as ICO lady and others who have had the sharp end of the grift. It’s the fact it’s a “veggie option” for a bbq which isn’t helping it either, as a -I’m sure you recall- lifelong vegetarian I’d be furious to be served that abomination of old beans and tinned fruit at a bbq.
Bbq rules is veggies first, get the quorn on and the Linda’s, then it’s the meats. Absolutely no salad to be seen!

 

[Candytuft]

I must have missed something I don’t remember Essex girl . Or anything about it all.
Or the ICO lady. What does ICO mean ?
Never mind I just want to knock some sense into deluded patreons who have more money than sense.
It’s just a dream it’ll never happen.

 

[Blurp]

From the nation that voted for Boaty McBoatFace....

It's killing me not voting on it to see the latest results but what goes on tattle stays on tattle!

Reminds me of a snippet I heard back in the days when NATO was actively involved in Afghanistan and Bin Laden was thought to be hanging out in the Tora Bora caves. The US Army were calling them The Caves of Doom while the British Army were referring to them as Tora Bora Tompkinson... [RIP]

 

[HotesTilaire]

I must have missed something I don’t remember Essex girl . Or anything about it all.
Or the ICO lady. What does ICO mean ?
Never mind I just want to knock some sense into deluded patreons who have more money than sense.
It’s just a dream it’ll never happen.

Essexgirl101 came on here talking about Jack, they were friends at one time. Then she popped up again to say Jack sent a “cease and desist” type legal letter so she stopped posting.
ICO lady was the squiggle who said they emailed Jack their personal story years ago and heard nothing more, Jack claimed that they had no idea where the email might be so couldn’t delete it and squiggle reported it to the Information Commissioner Office as a breach òf data.

 

[Captainmouse]

Maybe it’s just me, but thinking about salads. Now, I get that there are combinations of things that you wouldn’t think of that make a tasty salad and there could be a book in it.
But it’s not cooking. Requires no skill whatsoever and you would think that nobody could bugger up a salad.
Anyway back to Jack.

There is nothing mackie can’t mangle

 

[schmetterling]

Morning Cabal!

Giggling at Mel Donte clown college's... social media 'management.' Them and Fack are a match made in fermented bean chaos heaven. I'm even contemplating attempting the cursed beans for Cabal Cookalong.

I have a few sick days and some pretty strong pain as a result. Send cattos etc etc. I should try some red lipstick but a mini chaos would be even better. Paging Dr. Monroe!

 

[MaineCoonMama]

Morning Cabal!

Giggling at Mel Donte clown college's... social media 'management.' Them and Fack are a match made in fermented bean chaos heaven. I'm even contemplating attempting the cursed beans for Cabal Cookalong.

I have a few sick days and some pretty strong pain as a result. Send cattos etc etc. I should try some red lipstick but a mini chaos would be even better. Paging Dr. Monroe!

Don't forget to tweet your symptoms to your 'stupidly large platform!' How else will they know? Wishing you much floof x

 

[MooBelle]

dunno about winning the outfit, but del monte have posted their mascots at Queens 2 years ago. poor buggers

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also, I'd completely forgotten about that guy who is totally not a del monte employee honest guv who posts all the positive emojis under every single grid post!

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Tinned bananas?

 

[kachoochoo]

Tinned bananas?

well, banana blossom comes in a tin...