Sorry
@Fruitjack I eat dinner at 18:30 every night but the Onion Police kicked my door in and hauled me off to Onion Custardy. My Onion Solicitor explained that I wasn't personally responsible for the creation of headrush spaghetti and it was all a big misunderstanding so they gave me an Onion Caution and let me go. Anyway, I'm here now and let me tell you, I've been on a ride.
Here are my ingredients (minus the garlic) so you can see the vegan replacements I made should you wish to replicate the recipe. It turns out dried mushrooms can go bad if you have ignored them since 2016 but fortunately I had real mushrooms that I dried out in the oven according to Jack's instructions. To be fair it did actually work but I had sliced them as thin as humanly possible with a very sharp santoku knife. There's no way cack-handed Jack could get them that thin, she'd probs have to get her son to mandoline them for her. I also had to roast the garlic properly since I don't have a microwave and wouldn't want to have to explain headrush spaghetti to the firemen putting out the blaze in my flat anyway.
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There's very little actual cooking involved in this recipe, it's just boiling the spaghetti and mixing everything else together in a bowl then adding the spaghetti. I was able to crush the remaining life out of my mushrooms with my fingers because they were so thin but if you followed her suggestion of cutting up dried mushrooms with scissors or hitting them with a rolling pin you'd be left with huge chunks of leathery mushroom. Looking at the garlic, cream, mushrooms, oil and white chocolate in the bowl I had a brief moment of 'what the
duck am I doing with my life'
Here it is before adding the final touches (this is a small rice bowl, I also have massive man hands so please excuse those)
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And its final form with some fresh parsley and cheese:
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Verdict: it's hideous. Absolutely irredeemable. Not just weird but actively repulsive. I honestly wasn't expecting it to be quite that bad. There is no possible way that this is not a joke. I've been had. What a mug. I think in my scaling down of the recipe I put a bit too much white chocolate in but then I also think that any amount of white chocolate is too much. A creamy mushroom and garlic spaghetti dish sounds quite nice but even if you just removed the white chocolate, this recipe still wouldn't hold up. It's dry AF. Even the mushrooms are dried
duck's saaaaaaaaake.
I'm taking you to Onion Court to sue for damages, Jack. My Onion Legal Team will be in contact shortly.
being a total cnut about it. Horrible really how pleased she is to be the winner there. As you say, indicates something very unhealthy in the relationship x
myself, but I called out a client on FB for this recently, who had a right go at a few of my chaps for an external repaint job (which was spit spot chef’s kiss perfect, done on time etc). Client, I found out was a proper Dire Straits grifter who constantly complained and threatened to leave bad reviews for smol (
