Jack Monroe #16 Queen of the freezer, bathtime teaser & blue tick pleaser

PennyLoafer · May 17, 2020

Bellybutton lint said:
I don't believe her fridge broke after a year. Sorry, I don't buy it. Another attention woe is me moan to garner sympathy. I have a hangover today

Penns, you are simply hilarious. xx Visible food for Invisible illnesses is brilliant.

Not so hilarious if you've bleeping LIVED with unimaginable, awful, devastating invisible illnesses for YEARS!

Sorry, just doing some Monroe cosplaying there.

Thanks Mrs Lint - just trying to spread a little gaiety! Your waterfall of Lucille Ball images cracked me up last night. She really was amazing xx

OT but a guy on Twitter said yesterday that I have a lovely smile. I was quite taken aback. I thanked him for the sweet compliment. If I were Jack Monroe, I would thrown it back in his face, claiming that my smile was the result of being hit in the face with a wok by my abusive cat and NOBODY CARED.

Bellybutton lint · May 17, 2020

PennyLoafer said:
If I were Jack Monroe, I would thrown it back in his face, claiming that my smile was the result of being hit in the face with a wok by my abusive cat and NOBODY CARED.

No, she would have said she was being stalked and bullied.

You spread a lot of gaiety, happiness and joy.

I was a little bit tipsy last night while doing that Lucille thing, sure was fun though.

Brian Butterfield · May 17, 2020

Jelly Bean said:
Always. So many new people come here and then stay on the strength of the petition and/or an IG rant.

Forever grateful for Sali's histrionics sending me here.

THANKS, SAL!

Bellybutton lint · May 17, 2020

My husband said he would rather eat Soylent Green than Jacks food. For those who don't know what Soylent green is, here you go:

Soylent Green - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

Mustard · May 17, 2020

Veronicaaa said:
God I love passion fruit and I haven't had any for years. You can freeze them whole, the pulp goes lovely when squeezed over vanilla ice cream, you don't even have to bother defrosting them.

Have you ever tried passion fruit curd?

Raker · May 17, 2020

PennyLoafer said:
Or she's going to zip up her boots and go back to her roots and produce a book of Greek-Cypriot/Northern Irish fusion recipes.

Sweet Jesus. As someone brought up in the “culinary” tradition of Northern Ireland this concept fills me with alarm. I can pack away the tray bakes, Tayto and potato farls with the best of them, but ....

Bellybutton lint · May 17, 2020

Raker said:
Sweet Jesus. As someone brought up in the “culinary” tradition of Northern Ireland this concept fills me with alarm. I can pack away the tray bakes, Tayto and potato farls with the best of them, but ....

JM cannot cook, or bake. End of. Bastardising NI cuisine would be the ultimate criminal act to food.

PoorPatrol · May 17, 2020

I know it’s irrelevant because her fridge ain’t broken, plus the mash didn’t happen, but 3kgs mash 1kg butter? Is she not even capable of making mash and therefore translating it into a bullshit story? I put a duck ton of butter into my mash and it’s still only about 125g to 1.5kgs potatoes. That makes about 2/3 of a decent sized saucepan full of mash. She made 3kgs so two saucepans of mash - with x4 packs of butter??? Wtf what a load of bollocks. Plus cheese

Lies LIES LIESSSSSS I TELL YA!!

lipsticktaser · May 17, 2020

lipsticktaser said:
I seen it on the wag thread on here. If you have some time I recommend reading it. In the words of JM, it is a hoot.
Also the Michelle keegan one is hot atm. A makeup artist from our girl has been on And spilled all sorts of tea. Amazeballs. Obvs won’t a pinch of salt but I’m loving it.

Dear lord! Well done if you understood that. I need to stop typing so fast with my fat thumbs and proof read.
I am not illiterate, I swear. My writing style is abrupt but I can form coherent sentences. Well, most of the time I can.

Nottonightbabe · May 17, 2020

PoorPatrol said:
I know it’s irrelevant because her fridge ain’t broken, plus the mash didn’t happen, but 3kgs mash 1kg butter? Is she not even capable of making mash and therefore translating it into a bullshit story? I put a duck ton of butter into my mash and it’s still only about 125g to 1.5kgs potatoes. That makes about 2/3 of a decent sized saucepan full of mash. She made 3kgs so two saucepans of mash - with x4 packs of butter??? Wtf what a load of bollocks. Plus cheese Lies LIES LIESSSSSS I TELL YA!!

It would be swimming wouldn't it?

Bubblesandflowers · May 17, 2020

I've just seen her listed as one of the best lockdown female food writer. I remembered she had a thread her! I can't wait to catch up and see all the reasons why she should not be in that list

skronkywildcat · May 17, 2020

Mustard said:
Have you ever tried passion fruit curd?

I love it! The English Heritage gift shop one is the best.

chocolate choux · May 17, 2020

Raker said:
Sweet Jesus. As someone brought up in the “culinary” tradition of Northern Ireland this concept fills me with alarm. I can pack away the tray bakes, Tayto and potato farls with the best of them, but ....

Come on, throw some questionable fusion combos out there for Jack to accidentally discover all by herself while fannying about in the kitchen

PoorPatrol · May 17, 2020

Bubblesandflowers said:
I've just seen her listed as one of the best lockdown female food writer. I remembered she had a thread her! I can't wait to catch up and see all the reasons why she should not be in that list

Ooh, settle down for the big fat juicy lies! You’ll be here a while

Bellybutton lint · May 17, 2020

Surely her 7th book would be centred on fresh food seeing as there will be a lot of it coming round in the next few months. I mean you can only do the tinned food thing for so long before you would want to throw yourself in front of train. I know some people have no choice but fresh veg is actually quite inexpensive right now.

Nottonightbabe · May 17, 2020

PoorPatrol said:
Ooh, settle down for the big fat juicy lies! You’ll be here a while

Come for the tit, stay for the wit

Alansbigplate · May 17, 2020

She could do a book about her non binary journey and needing to use up stuff that’s going off out your broken fridge and call it ‘On The Turn’

my_escape_from_the_ads · May 17, 2020

PennyLoafer said:
My tuppence worth on food storage: if it's not refrigerated in the shop, it doesn't need to be so at home.

I think only meat, fish and dairy need to go in the fridge tbh.

It's like best before/use by dates - we've become too hung up on this sort of thing and should trust to our senses more.

Can i ask what people do with jars ? Like jams etc? Fridge or cupboard. ? I have an unseemly amount of bloody jars in my fridge.

Nottonightbabe · May 17, 2020

Bellybutton lint said:
Surely her 7th book would be centred on fresh food seeing as there will be a lot of it coming round in the next few months. I mean you can only do the tinned food thing for so long before you would want to throw yourself in front of train. I know some people have no choice but fresh veg is actually quite inexpensive right now.

I'm curious as to what she'll theme it as. She's done 3 standard 'breadline' books. One around tins. A vegan theme. And now recipes for 'bad days'. Dinner party on a budget perhaps? Frugal gourmet?

Bellybutton lint · May 17, 2020

my_escape_from_the_ads said:
Can i ask what people do with jars ?

Put them under your stairs storage like JM does. She has 100 and eleventy eleven of them.

Nottonightbabe said:
I'm curious as to what she'll theme it as. She's done 3 standard 'breadline' books. One around tins. A vegan theme. And now recipes for 'bad days'. Dinner party on a budget perhaps? Frugal gourmet?

Campfire cooking. I mean it's the only sensible thing now that she had THAT bleeping SHED.