Jack Monroe #148 Ya prune

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This was me earlier, when I found the toad in the holes! My head was spinning by the end of it. She’s had so many ‘this is it now, my life is fantastic and I’m having the last laugh’ moments it’s unreal. One thing I did notice, was that her food was much more fresh, colourful, and interesting going back a few years. She doesn’t give a tit anymore, she makes no effort at all.
Yes, pre-cartoon filter, pre-smoothie bowl, pre-price-tag-on-image, there was a phase of fresh produce interspersed with reasonable looking dishes. Though all her baking looks crap, regardless of era.
 
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Thank goodness Mackie tweeted someone about this last week, or this would never have been sorted out.
Unsafe cladding? Fixed it, mate.
 
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This was me earlier, when I found the toad in the holes! My head was spinning by the end of it. She’s had so many ‘this is it now, my life is fantastic and I’m having the last laugh’ moments it’s unreal. One thing I did notice, was that her food was much more fresh, colourful, and interesting going back a few years. She doesn’t give a tit anymore, she makes no effort at all.
The sad thing is though that she really doesn't have to improve. She gets so much work based on her slop, so why bother? Clearly she's a basic, sweetie guzzling little goblin, for all her claims of blue cheese and olive semi freddo 'fine dining' 🤢 who can't really cook, but has to produce something for the gullible. It's like some sort of mind boggling Emperor's new clothes type experiment, how far can she push it before people say no?
 
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@Soapy Dolphin , when you said, "This one looks more like a JM - sloppy and brown. Forensic Fraus, can you spot anything? Photographed in a tray or drawer perhaps?" I thought I'd give it one last shot. By Jove, I found it! Jack and NotJack must have the same interior decorator.

Jack - I had to do a bit of forensic digging, but like a lot of glove/bird serial killers, our girl got sloppy (LOL) and started working in plain sight. Her stress dinos on Twitter
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NotJack

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Wahey, you are awesome! 🙇‍♀️ I only mentioned it because of the spookily familiar slop. :D

Wish I'd found you ninnies earlier and I could have experienced so much more of the sleuthing and the receipts.

Wonder what Linda M would think if they knew she'd been dicking about on their posts and lying to the viggles? 😠 Doesn't really fit with her narrative of being the perpetual victim.
 
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New comment under the Metro article. Judging by the lovely fresh fish comment I think they're a squiggle, not a viggle.

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@Soapy Dolphin , when you said, "This one looks more like a JM - sloppy and brown. Forensic Fraus, can you spot anything? Photographed in a tray or drawer perhaps?" I thought I'd give it one last shot. By Jove, I found it! Jack and NotJack must have the same interior decorator.

Jack - I had to do a bit of forensic digging, but like a lot of glove/bird serial killers, our girl got sloppy (LOL) and started working in plain sight. Her stress dinos on Twitter
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NotJack

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Excellent work.
 
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Oh god she’s wheeling out those tit crusty sweeties again, can’t help but wonder if this engagement trap is to increase visibility of the tin rattle?

Brilliant news tho: she didn’t gain a single Patreon 😂 and it looks like our crappy little bungalow of a data table worked through the night! Meaningless table attached x
 

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@Cunderthunt If you're looking for liars you'll love Belle Gibson, if you haven't heard of her before. Famously claimed to have cured her brain cancer with a whole food diet.

She's not quite on Jack's level of non-stop shite but just as poisonous. Happy to dig out some articles or you can google The Whole Pantry.

Love your name btw!
 
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Still sitting here waiting for the House magazine article to land.

Reading her 3000 angry words will at least prevent me from watching Rachel Johnson pretend to have had a normal childhood make March come a little quicker.
 
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I've just spent an hour going through her Instagram trying to triangulate NotJack's plates. No success, but it's been truly a wild ride. Long before us, there's knitting, Viv, Nigella, non-binary, trans, vegan mama bear, who gets regular homophobic and/or sexist abuse by taxi drivers/passers by for wearing hot pants/having tattoos, but she's stronger than ever because she's 90%vegan/self-love crap. She's also had at least 70 billion decluttering sessions since 2014, suggesting shes not very good at decluttering.
I started to do this then I remembered she has every piece of crockery known to man. We don't even know if NotJack's plates are from the spring, summer, autumn, winter or Christmas collection.

The Twitter account being immediately deleted sealed it for me, especially as she had tweeted about veganism and trains, two Jack interests.

NotJack also has no friends on their Insta, just vegan accounts, which is what you'd expect from an alt account, not an Insta newbie. NotJack has made their Insta one food photo then one motivational quote - the same chessboard approach Jack used last year (one colour food photo, one B&W cat/behind the scenes photo) until that became unsafe and she switched to the comic filter.

NotJack loves Violife, Biscoff and Matt Haig...

 
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She’s done all of this just so she can talk about tampons, cos she’s an irreverent Maverick. I’ve never known someone to go on about boobs, arses, fannies and cocks as much as this idiot. It’s not risqué, Jack. It’s not even funny. You’re just a basic witch, and probably a total prude at the end of the day.
I can't for the life of me understand why she needed to hide them away in the dining room, regardless of the container. Stick em in the bathroom cabinet, that's where she would use them, surely.

They are not something that needs hiding, her previous live in partners have all been women, so will know what they are. I have never met a grown man to be embarrassed by finding tampons in a woman's home either. They can be explained to her son, as part of educating him about women's bodies. They are not something to be ashamed of so I'm stumped at her thinking.

The only thing I can think of is that she goes into the dining room to insert her tampons. The pink, soft, soft curtains might make her unruly labia look their best. It's the only explanation I can come up with.
 
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@Cunderthunt If you're looking for liars you'll love Belle Gibson, if you haven't heard of her before. Famously claimed to have cured her brain cancer with a whole food diet.

She's not quite on Jack's level of non-stop shite but just as poisonous. Happy to dig out some articles or you can google The Whole Pantry.

Love your name btw!
Haha thanks, you're the first person whose noticed! 😊

I just googled her, that's absolutely shocking! Her lies are lethally dangerous. She seems as batshit as Jack, but with more organisational and marketing ability. I have to admire the execution of her grift. Jack could never. Belle reminds me of Vonny Leclerc in a way, in that she obviously has some kind of talent that she is squandering on her lies, rather than using legitimately.

The latest on Belle Gibson was that she was speaking in Oromo and pretending to be Ethiopian.

PS - due to your username, I think we require a cat tax ;)
 
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I can't for the life of me understand why she needed to hide them away in the dining room, regardless of the container. Stick em in the bathroom cabinet, that's where she would use them, surely.

They are not something that needs hiding, her previous live in partners have all been women, so will know what they are. I have never met a grown man to be embarrassed by finding tampons in a woman's home either. They can be explained to her son, as part of educating him about women's bodies. They are not something to be ashamed of so I'm stumped at her thinking.

The only thing I can think of is that she goes into the dining room to insert her tampons. The pink, soft, soft curtains might make her unruly labia look their best. It's the only explanation I can come up with.
I’m waiting for a reply on the thread (as I have had to let it go to focus on the Jack threads so am not up to date) but it looks like Rebecca Lamb may have been gifted some swizzles...suspicious timing for Jack to be showing off an ex-tampon holder full of the same sweets.
 
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