Jack Monroe #103 Take her as she is or leave her be
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I wonder where he is, in the space-time continuum. I’m almost jealous of him reading all of this madness from the beginning, a newly hatched he-Frau, about to enter Jackie Wonka’s world of pure imagination
it’s like when someone decides to start watching The Sopranos, you’re sort of happy for them.... but slightly jealous.We’ve SEENT IT!Because I like a laugh I follow Jackie on Instagram. She has made the most disgusting sandwich spread for her son’s packed lunch. Cheap Mayo mixed with cream cheese, “yellow sticker” salad, minced kale, cooked and “smashed to crumbs “ bacon and minced kale. Poor boy.
The mayo thing is so.weird.
Cba to find the receipt but im sure smartprice mayo was bought on one of the £20 Asda shops.
WHYYY?? If she has a case of the good stuff at home. What a waste of a precious chunk of her 20 quid. Is it that SB can only eat the cheapo stuff and she saves the Hellmans for herself, which would be alarming or is she just banging on about smartprice to push the pov narrative and can't up with what she tweets?
Cba to find the receipt but im sure smartprice mayo was bought on one of the £20 Asda shops.
WHYYY?? If she has a case of the good stuff at home. What a waste of a precious chunk of her 20 quid. Is it that SB can only eat the cheapo stuff and she saves the Hellmans for herself, which would be alarming or is she just banging on about smartprice to push the pov narrative and can't up with what she tweets?
Who has the number for Environmental Health?
What the Hellman’s is that?
According to the insta caption it was SB’s tea, you can tell cos it’s got bacon in it. Ooh yay she’s treated him to some day old water and horse spunk sauce
Something so twisted about how she goes on and on about feeding her son asda smart price stuff while she feasts on waitrose cheese (£15/kg) and Hellmans
I was brought up on economy food all in yellow packets from the local supermarket, but we also had a lot of fresh fruit. I honestly got the shock of my life when I went to university (fancy!) and realised that some people bought branded food (I'm from a poor community in a poor part of the UK), but things are different now, and if you take advantage of supermarket deals etc I don't see a huge difference in price between (for example) Hellmans or Philadelphia, and the Smart Price equivalents, but I notice a big difference in taste.
Smart Price Jack triggers the life out of me because of the way I was fed when I was growing up, it's all a game and a joke to her, she hasn't a bleeping clue. My SBs eat really well (not boasting) and I sacrifice other stuff (I live in a small house for eg, not complaining, I love it and I know I am super lucky #blessed #lol) because I choose to prioritise that because of my experiences.
(Thank god my parents didn't feed us JM slop!)
I was brought up on economy food all in yellow packets from the local supermarket, but we also had a lot of fresh fruit. I honestly got the shock of my life when I went to university (fancy!) and realised that some people bought branded food (I'm from a poor community in a poor part of the UK), but things are different now, and if you take advantage of supermarket deals etc I don't see a huge difference in price between (for example) Hellmans or Philadelphia, and the Smart Price equivalents, but I notice a big difference in taste.
Smart Price Jack triggers the life out of me because of the way I was fed when I was growing up, it's all a game and a joke to her, she hasn't a bleeping clue. My SBs eat really well (not boasting) and I sacrifice other stuff (I live in a small house for eg, not complaining, I love it and I know I am super lucky #blessed #lol) because I choose to prioritise that because of my experiences.
(Thank god my parents didn't feed us JM slop!)
Despite 103 threads worth of scathing, ephemeral, polemic analysis, none of us have got to the bottom of why she does all of this tit! Attention, feeding her narcissism, deep rooted issues that she’s not getting help for.
the cavatappi pasta. That’s all I can triangulate, I’m normally tit at it! The fairies must have brought it round with the rest of the Ocado shop. 
Back of the net!I love you
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Gee, I really hope that one of SB's teachers sees that his mum is having to feed three people for £20 a week and helps get him set up on free school meals.
IT WAS A GIFT FROM THE MAGIC PUDDLE AND I COOKED IT REUSED WATER WHICH ALSO CAME FROM THE PUDDLE OF DREAMS.
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Back of the net!
Don’t be jealous. I’m in 53, barely recovered from the kitten debacle, singing, Edinburgh- land of the chain restaurant and then train tweet fiasco. It’s hard going. I’ve only recently found out what TOO SHORT is about. I’ll be buggered if I don’t find brambly mice or urban decay train eye injury’s origin stories soon...there’s just so muchI wonder where he is, in the space-time continuum. I’m almost jealous of him reading all of this madness from the beginning, a newly hatched he-Frau, about to enter Jackie Wonka’s world of pure imagination
Because a squashed to duck, soggy sandwich is every SBs dream
Buy a lunch box with compartments, then you don't need to wrap anything. I hate wrapping stuff full stop, and this was a huge consideration for me in buying one for my daughter. Not ecoJack, just lazyCookie!
What the tit? My SB is the same age and he eats pretty much everything but I would have to bribe him with extra Nintendo Switch time to eat that sandwich or pasta dish. Why does everything have to be a weird maverick concoction? Why not just cheesy broccoli pasta? A burger & salad every once in a while? Also what’s the point of crispy bacon in a wet sandwich that will be completely soggy by tomorrow lunchtime?
This. Give that lad a simple decent meal, why pasta needs to be cooked in leftover beetroot water anyway, I don't know. That sandwich will be gross by tomorrow - those tiny bits of watery bagged salad, with the cream cheese soaking into the bread. His mum gets the fancy cheese & duck eggs. His 'treat' is a biscuit with the arse end bitten off
I’d actually be more impressed if Jack or anyone created nutritionally balanced costed recipes without yellow whoops ingredients, you know, like everyone could buy?
In my Asda the whoops stuff is mainly meat, and ready meals. Very rare there is reduced salad or veg and when there is its twenty bags of brown lettuce
If she gotta pepperoni pizza from whoops as a treat for SB I’d be ok with that.
It was even worse than that (imho). My sister (
) used it for a while, and what most impressed me when I visited her was that she could talk about it with a straight face. Photo evidence appended:
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