Eagerly awaiting Jack Monroe #500 SHE LEFT! (again) when a new frau shows up with "I was a jackolyte until she didn't send me the Wispa Gold I requested and it made think something wasn't right. So I googled her and I've been Grunka-ing ever since..."
Jack Monroe #100 Jack Monroe and The Jimmy Nail Experience - she’s still lying
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Oh she's absolutely bleeping giddy to be First Lady to the Head of News and Affairs at channel 4 again! She's like Evita but with chocolate bars
So the chocolate goes express, overnight guaranteed delivery, and the patreon goes via tortoise? Snail? Brambley mice?
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100 threads, I can’t even remember when I started lurking.You have all kept me entertained for months. Although I’ve been working I live alone so it’s been a hard year (*shakes tip jar).
I feel I shouldn’t name people as don’t want to be accused of favouritism but...
@Alansbigplate: your name alone makes me smile (as does any ref to Alan partridge). Your work with face tuning is equally terrifying and hilarious
@traumatised sideboard: your reviews on DKL ended me, I hooted like you wouldn’t believe! (I’m actually tempted to grunk the DKL threads)
special shout out to brenda’s sausages too
anyway enough sentiment, all of you can duck off now xxx
I feel I shouldn’t name people as don’t want to be accused of favouritism but...
@Alansbigplate: your name alone makes me smile (as does any ref to Alan partridge). Your work with face tuning is equally terrifying and hilarious
@traumatised sideboard: your reviews on DKL ended me, I hooted like you wouldn’t believe! (I’m actually tempted to grunk the DKL threads)
special shout out to brenda’s sausages too
anyway enough sentiment, all of you can duck off now xxx
I didn’t clock the pig thing either. But I never do.
I'm a thread 1 Frau
I'm having a reminisce and wanted to give a shout out to @TheDragonWithAFlagon for coming up with what is possibly my favourite track on Now That's What I Call Jack! I've had 
what a wanker stuck in my head many many times.
what a wanker stuck in my head many many times.
Oh this is genius from Jack, damage limitation at its finest there. “How can Jack be a horrible manipulative tea leaf, she bought us chocolate?” You’ve answered your own question there Squiggles.
Not once have I been guilty of this.
I saw the Limegoss article, commented on that and then found the threads. It has been the best Lockdown entertainment at times although have also felt genuine anger at some of Jack's antics. The Fraus and Herrs are officially the funniest on the planet and expert triangulators. This cabal should be writing Jack's autobiography.
Jack must be feeling very smug now that Louisa is back (why in God's name?). The chocolate bar things strikes me as a very Narc trait. Lovebombing to deflect attention from the crappy behaviour.
Jack must be feeling very smug now that Louisa is back (why in God's name?). The chocolate bar things strikes me as a very Narc trait. Lovebombing to deflect attention from the crappy behaviour.
Odds on SHE LEFT, AGAIN before the new year?
(I don't/do mean to be glib, I remember getting back together with an ex, it was a disaster)
(I don't/do mean to be glib, I remember getting back together with an ex, it was a disaster)
Lion Bar? That well known snack of choice for lactose intolerant vegans who don’t eat sugar.
£20 shop right there...
You’re giving her until New Year? Much more generous than me. I give it 2 weeks of lockdown together.
Is the chocolate her way of celebrating the 100th thread? If so, Vlad says he’d like a Mars Bar.
ETA duck I’m now going to have nightmares about 2 weeks of lockdown with Captain Killjoy. Someone send me a Kinder Surprise, stat!
Jack: Free chocolate to one and all! There’s no catch! Just remember this act of generosity when I’m lying on the kitchen floor in despair again with no butter. Choose anything you want, anything, my pretties! I will fulfil your heart’s desire with chocolate!
Follower: Would love a jar of paprika, cheers love.
Follower: Would love a jar of paprika, cheers love.
such a shiiiiit selection of snacks too
In no way implying anything untoward but now that Louisa is back was that 'Royalty Cheque' left on a chest of drawers in an upstairs room?
Well here is proof why she’s so tit with money. She gets an advance and the first thing she does is spunk a wad on bleeping chocolate to get some Twitter likes?
duck me Jack, go and buy a new pair of Vapormax or have a pretend experience in Burberry. Go to Redcar. Just get her away from the attention on Twitter as it’s turning her into a non entity. It’s like a disorder.
duck me Jack, go and buy a new pair of Vapormax or have a pretend experience in Burberry. Go to Redcar. Just get her away from the attention on Twitter as it’s turning her into a non entity. It’s like a disorder.
Ermmmmm what happened to having to survive on £20 a week for food?!
Ahhhh of course all out the window now you've conned.. oops I'm sorry "sweet talked" your sugar momma cash cow into moving back in. Next you'll be deleting the tip jar and reimbursing your Patreon subscribers I assume?!
ETA royalty cheque my arse.
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