Right my list of demands to Gareth, The Head of Kit, Social Media team, assorted staff at SGP:
- Play Jack for the full 90 minutes in all games (true it might tire him out but nothing like I could wear him out)
- Take the hem up on the legs of his shorts by a good 6 inches
- Pre-wash his kit at 90C and leave in the hot tumble dryer for 3 days to shrink nicely
- Focus all videos/photography on Jack (example below)
- Get him in the pool in special new edition England speedos
- Get him out the pool and into a roasting sauna, visual evidence required - no clothing allowed, too hot
- Ensure all his warm ups/cool downs involve a lot of bending over and leg stretches; full video coverage mandatory
- Appoint me as Head of Massaging Jack as with all that training and game playing he’s going to need some tender and curious hands to smooth out the knots in his muscles
and give him a few pleasurable happy endings