Ok everyone, put the wine (and line) down!
We can't have mAlice go to rehab and come out sober, only to find that we all need to go now, from self-medicating ourselves through this car crash! It would make mAlice too happy and that, for me at least, is something I really fucking object to at this point!
PS I would LOVE to be a fly on the wall whenever Alice get one of those calls from Accident and Injury companies:
Caller: Have you had an accident or injury in the past three years that wasn't your fault?
Alice: Yes, yes I have!!
Caller: what happened ma'am?
Alice: my husband broke my heart, but it's his scheming mistress behind it all. We should sue her! She has tried to kill my kids too (in my dreams, but that totally counts, right?).
Caller: Ma'am, that's not strictly what ....
Alice: No no, her Bogan lies damaged my heart and my mind, I will never recover....hello?....hello?
Caller:.........