Ioan Gruffudd & Alice Evans #229 The day that Ioan realised she was totally and utterly bonkers

[scantysandwich]

It baffles me how bad her sense of style is. How can anyone get to her age and not have at least some idea of what suits them?!! And being in the acting and modelling worlds, she'll have had more opportunities than most to learn what looks good.

‘Learn’ being the operative word here.

 

[WinterSolstice]

Omg
Okay I've lost all knowledge of the deal with regards to title threads, and sorry all (and mods) if this is too early, but title thread suggestion right here

What about…. Alice’s trolling shoes?

 

[Bridgeofsighs]

How can anyone get to her age and not have at least some idea of what suits them?!! And being in the acting and modelling worlds, she'll have had more opportunities than most to learn what looks good.

she'll have had more opportunities than most in every way! But all we get is "Woe is me!" shite from her.

 

[marjorytrashheap]

I posted about Amanda Abbington when Strictly started. I used her as an example of someone of a similar age who had managed to pick herself up and get on with her life after the end of a long relationship. I don't think that there's any link with Alice.

I must say that I didn't warm to her on her stint on Strictly. As you say, she's very gushy and OTT.

Yeah, she does give me bad vibes and I think there are similarities.

Spoiler: TW

Also I didn't like that interview she gave where she said she thought about taking her life after an argument with her daughter. I just felt terrible for her daughter for that story to be out there in the world, as an example of 'just being honest about mental health!' I don't know, it might just be me but it hit badly IMO. Her daughter was only about 13 or 14 when this happened I think.

Anyway, they certainly pull from the same playbook, but she's still doing light years better than Alice with life in general.

 

[lulooo]

They always were. She thinks she looks great as you can see from the smug smiles. Before she used to wear a dress over jeans now it's the leggings with bulky layers on top. Still

Wearing dresses over trousers used to be a "thing" back in the day. I used to wear them, but smart versions and for work. A dress designer I knew back then and who was always immaculately turned out also did. I certainly wouldn't dress like that today. I do have some shortish dresses, and long tunic tops that I wear over leggings/thick tights, clean and not torn I may add. Love to go bare legged in the summer, but not at this time of year in Wales! Each to their own.

Edited to add Jeans too. Since I retired and don't have to dress smartly every day I relish wearing jeans, and whatever else I like on a daily basis.

 

[marjorytrashheap]

Wearing dresses over trousers used to be a "thing" back in the day. I used to wear them, but smart versions and for work. A dress designer I knew back then and who was always immaculately turned out also did. I certainly wouldn't dress like that today. I do have some shortish dresses, and long tunic tops that I wear over leggings/thick tights, clean and not torn I may add. Love to go bare legged in the summer, but not at this time of year in Wales! Each to their own.

I also used to do this! It was very early noughties. Thank god phone cameras didn't exist then and there is no evidence...

 

[lulooo]

AFE asked people to vote for "her friend" AA when she was on Strictly. That was enough for me to decide she was never going to get my vote

And me. I always thought that there was something a bit off about AA.

 

[marjorytrashheap]

And me. I always thought that there was something a bit off about AA.

Yeah, I also know someone who had real life dealings with her in a professional environment where she was extremely rude and belittling, so I've always thought of that too when I've seen her on tv. She may have been having an off day because we all have them, but the way you treat people more junior to you says a lot I think.

 

[M33L4]

I dont know if I ever shared this before but this cracks me up every time I'm in a shopping mall ever since this story
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@welp always brings the Yo-Tea

 

[welp]

Sheesh

 

[Bridgeofsighs]

Wearing dresses over trousers used to be a "thing" back in the day.

A bit like puffball skirts which aren't even that bad in comparison. I only remember Alice doing this combo in the noughties on her own though. When was this a thing? Sorry it's hideous and nothing will make me think otherwise. I remember some kid wearing this combo in primary school (the 70s) and I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

Isn't the readiness hearing tomorrow week? Tick tock AFE

 

[CookieMonsta]

While I respect the right of others to share their opinions, I personally think it’s important to remember that Ella isn’t just an average, happy, well-adjusted, happy upbringing fourteen year old. She’s a child that has been living in turmoil, grieving her father, having poison dripped into her ear, for the past three years now, and no doubt was exposed to a lot of conflict before then too. I will never see her as anything other than a victim of Alice and I think her behaviour makes perfect sense given what she’s been through. The level of psychological stress she has lived through in that house cooped up, away from school and peers, for a prolonged period of time, is enough to lead to genuine complex PTSD. I wish so much for her and Elsie, and I do fear for their futures.

Ella is trying to cope with so many layers upon layers of trauma and abuse, and through it all she's a 14 year old child who desperately wants to be loved and to be safe, trying to navigate a hell hole that has broken many adults in similar situations. In some ways she will be more mature for her age because of what she's living through, but in many ways she will be very immature for her age, because what she's living through is denying her the same experiences most of her peers are having. Like you, I'm not surprised she is acting out. I hope and pray Ella and Elsie can find their way forward into a future full of love and happiness.

@ZipSilver
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I'd love to see her Pinterest for amusement value. Sorry for the triple post last night, no idea how that happened.

I hope somebody has linked it. Trust me, you're going to love her page!
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So her 'hero/muse/idol' is... herself?

Yeah. That is disturbing.

That is my all time favourite part!
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This is probably Alice socking on the DM. Everyone's Bianca lol

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and this is what's called using the children as both a sword and a shield, just like Andrea Burkhart said. Of course, it's projection. AFE bullies her kids, not us. A narc's accusations are confessions.

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I posted on here something about that song "I'm feeling good" and suddenly Alice is using those lyrics?! But nah, she doesn't read here! She constantly gives herself away using "it" and accusing people of being Bianca. She can't process that Bianca has 7inches to play with at night and has too many other fun things to do than sit her ass on SM and bully Alice from behind socks.

PS: should we have a drink every time she mentions NarcRage?
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I’ve been thinking about what’s going on with Ella, and the disapprobation she still receives on these threads sometimes.
I teach psychology to pre-U students - one of my many hats. I won’t go into axons and dendrons; but I think it’s important to bear in mind what happens to the brain as a child reaches adolescence. In short, it’s Armageddon. Grey matter decreases; white matter increases. The brain refolds itself, trimming away extraneous matter. Neurons and neuronal activity increases. Emotions run riot. A teenager’s social state reflects directly on her mental state, and vice versa. Lifelong tendencies to depression and addiction are established during the teen years. Ella has been going through years of hell. We only see the carnage of Casa Evans from a distance. Ella is in the middle of it.
Alice referred to the girls as her ‘life’s work’. IG, for the sake of his own sanity - and I don’t think it would be pushing the envelope through the sorting-office wall to say ‘existence’ - left Ella at the worst possible time in her development, because Alice left him no choice in so doing. She was on the cusp of young adulthood, where, as mentioned above, the brain goes through sizeable and unalterable changes. Physical development, menstruation - with its huge challenges, not the least of which means a young woman realises her capacity for fertility and has to guard against it, plus all the predatory behaviour from the males of the species it brings - and, as a Harvard study suggests, cycling through every single human emotion once every twenty four hours… plus the nightmare of a manipulative and damaging mother-figure who punishes where she should praise, and praises where she should punish.
Ella should have been allowed to follow the normal maturation process, i.e. begin to separate herself from the mother figure and explore her own identity. (Usually, this involves a lot of slammed doors, ‘I hate you’, and competition.) Instead, she was forced to believe she could ‘change’ and counsel her own father. She had to witness her mother’s incessant drunkenness, alarming behaviour, and experience foulmouthed abuse. Ella endured endless tales of her father’s apparent betrayal, to the extent she became brainwashed against him. Then, at a time when she should have been indulging in customary adolescent risk-taking and social interaction, she was pulled from school and wider society for an entire year and isolated with an abusive, substance-addicted woman. God knows how many hours Alice worked on Ella. And God only knows what Alice claimed, given her unfamiliarity with the truth. I wouldn’t be surprised if Evans claimed IG perpetrated the most vile and horrific crimes in an effort to get Ella onside.
What seems to be forgotten is just how young Ella is. Her shocking behaviour during the sleepover is not that of an adult, but a much younger child. Older adolescents may have indulged in a bit of arson and/or criminal damage. Ella threw around groceries and ran away. The account of her behaviour by the psychiatrist is more reminiscent of a nine-year-old - and the judge saw it.
Because she has been simultaneously infantilised and parentified, she has been forced into the position whereby she feels responsible for Alice, yet has absolutely no compulsion to mature. Her various crimes - hacking into his IG and posting infantile messages, stealing $400 for Christmas presents - are the actions of a much younger person. Her height is irrelevant. She’s a damaged, disturbed kid who has been kept in a near-hostage situation. She has had no chance to develop at her own speed, and her enforced isolation ensures she’s infantilised.
She’s not beyond hope, though. The therapist with whom she is working will be making sizeable changes. By appealing to her immaturity, they will hopefully be able to instill in her the foundations for responsible, mature adulthood. But it is incredibly difficult to undo that much manipulation, estrangement and faux-adoration. Pushing her down the model route, so that Alice can be a Kardashian-style momager, is a catastrophic mistake. While Ella is undoubtedly a beautiful girl, she has neither the maturity nor resilience to cope with the dark, cutthroat, shallow and insincere world of modelling.
I think IG knows all this, which is why he hasn’t given up hope. It may take years for Ella to grow up and wake up to what has been done to her, but he will always be ready to welcome her home. She is a desperately wounded soul who needs understanding and compassion, no matter how vilely she has behaved. It is best not to judge her by adult standards, but see her as the wounded, manipulated child that she is.

(Apologies for the essay. Returning to lurking - depression. Love to all.)

I love you @Autisteuse Both you and every word you wrote.

 

[AllFurCoatNoKnickers1]

Wearing dresses over trousers used to be a "thing" back in the day. I used to wear them, but smart versions and for work. A dress designer I knew back then and who was always immaculately turned out also did. I certainly wouldn't dress like that today. I do have some shortish dresses, and long tunic tops that I wear over leggings/thick tights, clean and not torn I may add. Love to go bare legged in the summer, but not at this time of year in Wales! Each to their own.

Edited to add Jeans too. Since I retired and don't have to dress smartly every day I relish wearing jeans, and whatever else I like on a daily basis.

Oddly enough - it’s back in style. Skirt over trousers. Even in Vogue.

 

[TheMogadon]

Alice might be tall but Bianca has 7 inches over her.

 

[CookieMonsta]

Ioan and Bianca bowling with an accountant and an investment person (If I have searched for the right people) is exactly my kind of humor given the recent filings lol

I actually wonder once they marry if Bianca thinks of doing something related to her old job again (her visa status will have blocked her so far from that). She clearly isnt going to have a acting career beyond occasional fun mini gigs. Of course if she received a insurance pay out as we suspect this wont be possible, but there are other jobs she can do even with MS. And I can understand not working if you dont have to thanks to your wealth.

Michael Ironside's wife was an actress who never really made it and she became an accountant and often did the account work on films. Even if acting is Bianca's first love, there are a lot of jobs bts on film she could do.
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I’d love to see a brown paper lunch sack with two eye holes cut out on her head with “bleep” written at the top, perhaps using sequins.

Move over AFE Designs, we're about to see @IHateHadargoyle Handbags storm the market!

 

[Loveu2]

The difference between smug and genuine.

 

[CookieMonsta]

Well said. I held back a bit as I know what a sensitive subject this is. To put it bluntly Ella looks like she might become Alice 2.0. We don't know what Alice was doing at 14 but my guess is she was the GC and got her way all the time. She was very likely a school bully too. She pretends she was bullied at school but every accusations she makes turns out to be projection.

People have told me to put myself in Ella's shoes and I have. I said some time ago that I would want to live with IG and BW in her shoes. I would apologise for the tit I pulled and not do anything abusive further. Not talking about typical teenage stuff, just no more abuse. IG is actually the FUN parent (Alice caps lol). He would take me on vacations and day trips. AFE just pretends to be the fun parent but Casa Evans seems as much fun as a funeral. The whole WE LAUGHED AND LAUGHED UNTIL WE WERE ON THE FLOOR is try hard bullshit. I would use the counselling to deal with having a narc mother and to help withstand all the guilt trips and manipulation.

Sure, Ella is being groomed - I know that and if IG was dead (AFE acts like he is) then I would see her as nothing but a victim. However, he's not so that's the parent I would favour and want to live with. Abuse can't be normalised and that includes abuse from 14 yo too though they have more mitigating factors. I just heard of a 14 yo (a girl) who threw a chair at a teacher in school and physically hurt her. Now the kid has a dysfunctional background obviously, but they were taking about expelling her, but didn't. (I would have). There's consequences even at 14. That's the way society works.

On some level Ella knows her mother doesn't love her. That is a devastating core wound that many adults don't ever get over. They spend a lifetime looking for love with the same kind of people because A) they don't believe they deserve love and B) they are desperate to heal that mother wound by making someone with the same issues as their mother love them in the belief that that will heal them. The greatest need for a human being is acceptance. The greatest fear is rejection. Ella already feels rejected by her father, and you can bet Alice is pounding this belief home every single day. She will be terrified of being rejected by her mother, and that will be compounded by the fact Alice is her mother, and all the complicated psychological and physiological needs that come with that bond. She's doing everything she can to earn her mother's love, and make no mistake, on some level she KNOWS she has to work for that love, that she has to be the perfect embodiment of what Alice wants at all times or risk being shut out in the cold, both emotionally and physically. That threat of "the babies can support me or they can duck off to Gloria's" was a terrifying threat in so many ways.

As for criticising Ella's behaviour by comparing her to Elsie in the same situation, they are completely different people and it's no surprise they might react to the same circumstances differently. They aren't clones of each other, even with the same parents and growing up in the same home. Anyone with siblings knows this. And sadly it looks like Elsie may not be so different from Ella - she didn't join in Ella's antics at Ioan and Bianca's flat, but apparently she was laughing too when they ran away. The reality is they are children stuck in an incredibly abusive situation with a mother who is deliberately hurting them to punish her ex, who will hurt them even more to punish them if they show any longing for their father. Surely we can all have compassion for that.

 

[Nixlondon]

A bit like puffball skirts which aren't even that bad in comparison. I only remember Alice doing this combo in the noughties on her own though. When was this a thing? Sorry it's hideous and nothing will make me think otherwise. I remember some kid wearing this combo in primary school (the 70s) and I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

Isn't the readiness hearing tomorrow week? Tick tock AFE

Will the report have been released? I bet Alice won't be able to hold it in, good or bad and will do one of her 'cryptic' posts.

 

[Loveu2]

Was it something we said.

 

[Ally Pally]

Was it something we said.

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