Helen Anderson #9 had a threesome, kind of..

[navybluewolf]

VIDEO SUMMARY:
Vlogmas Day 6
The Christmas Spreadsheet​

Helga seems to have fallen off the schedule train already, does she upload at 9pm? 6pm? Who the fuck knows anymore. Maybe the element of surprise is supposed to be fun?

Judging by the title of this vlog WE ARE IN FOR A TREAAAAAT

Starting off with her gulping down her cup of tea (or mug of wine) "Oh god... I drank sooo much tea taday... it's jast bin sa coald that all I want is just 'ot liquid runnin' through ma body"

It's a new week.... she's telling us yet again that she's only uploading Monday to Friday (because she's a lazy fook) and will be filming stuff over the weekend to upload on Monday. Bitch needs her weekends off from pressing a button, and she doesn't want to "worry about the upload". She just wants to enjoy the weekend a bit more. And to just "have a bit of a break" she laughs.

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She had a really nice weekend, she had a chilled Saturday morning watching some trash TV, had a "barf" (bath), did her virtual borefest (wreath making... again). Now she's telling us... again... how she "normally" would be going to the work shop together.

"But obviously because of URGHMMM" She can't even say pandemic or corona, she just has to pathetically make a noise, roll her eyes and pull weird facial expressions:

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Tells people to go watch the video, judging by the piss poor view count - no one fucking wants to, Helga.

After her wreath making she watched a bunch of Christmas films. Sunday she met up with her sister and GEORGE and did a coastal walk, and now we get a flash back in slow motion, yay.

Oh god... she even placed the camera down and ran off just to do her walking back while talking bit. She's so fucking lame. Here she comes waddling towards us, telling us how she reached the summit and that they're going to have some cake. Waddle waddle.

Now she interviews her sister and George... Hayley says the walk has been good... George sarcastically says he's having the time of his life. This interview goes on for a bit. They've all had some cake and now they're going off to get some fish and chips.

"There's a boat there, which for a moment I thought was a whale" Says Hayley, "Maybe it was a whale... there!" as Helga comes into shot and now it's the whale's... I mean her turn for an interview with the camera to announce that they're going back now

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"FILWHIP have yer ad a nice tyme?"

Fil finally enunciates today "It's been lovely, yes"

Helen is proud that Fil used his words properly. "Yes, lovely time darling"

More slow mo montage as they head into town for their fish and chips. Now we get to watch them all stuff their faces while talking "FIRTEEN PAOWNDS FOR ALL DIS!" Helga loves bargain food.

Back to present day Helga, telling us that when she got back they watched a reaaallly cool movie called Host which was filmed during lockdown on Zoom, and she tells us that when she was editing her wreath making vlog with her zoom call she got the heebie jeebies that there was a ghost in her footage.

Getting on with today, Monday's are usually her "setting up" day where she plans the week ahead, so we cut to footage of her tidying up her house.. again... she might even do a bit of laundry too (ooh!).

Monday's she likes to straighten up the office too - because she does sooooo much work in there obvs. She does a bit of a hoover and a bit of a clean so she can have a nice working environment again.

She also does "life stuff" like "life admin" (eg bill paying) and plan the rest of the week so she gets her diary up... we can see she's super busy... look how chockablock that calendar is!

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She's figuring out what she's doing for the rest of the week and what she's uploading... which is nothing by the looks of her diary... I thought she was well proud of her spreadsheet before December hit?

"Monday's are also FOOD DAY!" says Helga, with a twinkle in her eye and a big smile on her face, she's got the dog's food and gusto delivered.

She's sitting her now, already planned her week and already edited her vlog. She's feeling content and on top of the world.

So other than the update, she wants to share with us THE SACRED CHRISTMAS SPREADSHEET! (Probably to prove herself to Tattle)

"WOAH THERE! I know wot yer finking, 'WOAH THERE! WOT? A CHRISTMAS SPREADSHEET?!'" No Helen, no one is thinking that... we are all sitting here thinking why the fuck this is classed as content.

She's a huge fan of spreadsheets.... (except when she complained about having to use them when doing her taxes....)

"I FORT 'YER KNOW WOT? I'M GUNNA SHARE THE CHRISTMAS SPREADSHEET TODAY!' THAT'S IN THE VEIN OF THE VLOG RIGHT? YEAH? COOL! OKAY! ORGANIZING! CHRISTMAS SPREADSHEET" Helen clearly has run out of ideas for vlogmas already....

Right... hold on folks... I need to pause and get myself ready for this shit.

Jesus Christ. Okay. Here we go.

She created this shit at the end of October, beginning of November because she was excited for Christmas and wanted something to look forward to, and she wanted to feel like she was in control more this year. Last year she was unorganised and disappointed in herself and she said to herself that this year she has GOT to raise the bar "AND I HAVE" she says....

She wanted to make sure that by making the spreadsheet she wasn't buying anything she didn't need and that she "wasn't gunna waste ANY FOOD!" (That sounds like Filwhip talking)

Now here we go... we're going to see the spreadsheet! I'm so excited I might wee myself!!!!!!!!!!!

​

Oh god Helen, STOP SAYING HOW MUCH YOU LOVE A SPREADSHEET, WE GET IT YOU LOVE IT, YOU WANT TO MARRY IT. GET ON WITH IT FFS.

"I'm getting... I'm getting, I'm learning how to used spreadsheets, like formulas and stuff like that" and now she lists when she uses spreadsheets..... like writing lists for holidays, money stuff, itineraries... you name it... and because Christmas is spread out over a period of time... she started making.... y'know... A FUCKING SPREADSHEET, WE GET IT.

First on the sheet is food. Obvs.

"It's really not that impressive, BUT PEOPLE KEEP ASKING" No, fucking stop right there Missy... NO ONE asked for this shit. Not a single fucking soul. Don't you blame this shit on us.

She loves getting her Christmas food from M&S and this year she's also done a Waitrose shop "Now every now and then I'll shop at these places, but these are generally deemed as "TREAT SHOPS"

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"A little bit of EXTRAAAAA" she flaps.


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"Granted" she always buys more than she needs, so this year she was a bit more cautious, a little bit more reserved (lol) and reeeeeally thought about it as there's only two of them and now SAVAGE is coming along too so that makes three...

So now she's made a Christmas menu and has put everything she's bought so far (so far being the key words there), so everything is accounted for and nothing gets wasted.

And here it is!

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Christmas eve is FIL's birthday so it's mystery, mystery on the menu. Xmas day is.... OH MY GOD NO ONE CARES.

Skipping through all this... I can hear her drooling already. Basically she's drinking all day everyday... what's new there?

Boxing day she's doing a new tradition of having a BBQ - she's well quirky

She's on to the next tab which is presents.... and it's blank because she doesn't want any spoilers.... so we're looking at a BLANK spreadsheet.....

Here's the main people she's buying for

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and now she explains how a list works... (basically you type what you need to buy in the need to buy bit and when you bought it you move it to the bought cell! MAGIC!)

She would make another spreadsheet, called the "Plan of Christmas" but she knows having a Christmas day itinerary would stress her out because she's a control freak who has to have everything her way. Reminder... there's only THREE people there... THREE.

oh, now she changes her mind "Oh no I do need to make an itinerary... I NEED TO MAKE A CHRISTMAS PLAN"

Fuck, she's doing this for content.....

She makes a list and says that she's taking FIL away for the night on his birthday.... seeing his parents on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day...

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She feels better writing all this down because her brain gets overwhelmed.

"If there's any other people wiv plans... let me know" she says to her spreadsheet.

She has to write it all the details down because she forgets things all the time... (like how to make interesting content)

That's all.

I can't believe how much she's drinking. Alcohol with breakfast for Christmas Day and Boxing Day? I've given up drinking. It's been 9 days (yes it was that bad I'm counting days and not weeks/months!). It was seeing that I was getting a beer belly like Helens that really made me take a hard look at myself and pack it in.
I'm planning one glass of baileys on New Years eve and then that's it forever.

 

[elskerbuller]

“hi im Helen, I live off my social media presence but im not on my phone alot soooo ”

 

[Tyla73]

Did she say she drank two bottles of Prosecco? Two large bottles? I would be on my arse if I drank that much! Working your way through two big bottles whilst wrapping presents in the day is just not normal.

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

So I’m currently watching the vlog and that apology is an absolute joke for a start it looked like she was dying to laugh and asking about how people are coping as if she gives a shit. Minnie will be delighted she’s showing concern though. Also I’d bet money her hairdresser absolutely rips her to shreds as soon as she leaves the building.

 

[HaveSomeMilk]

Is anyone still reading this? It's super fun isn't it. Type the word Jelly Belly if you're still here.​

Helga is getting super excited about going into the city on Saturday "OOOOH!!! YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS IN THE CITY???" Covid, Helen. Covid is in the city.

this part made me laugh so hard I had to explain who Helen even was to my bf so he could know what was so funny

 

[Tyla73]

Oh I am loving this person’s work on YouTube. I wonder if she’ll respond or delete?

 

[Lunamoon22]

i don’t understand why she doesn't use these companies to help, if sainsburys gifted you something, why not see if you can work with them to do a giveaway for at least your UK followers, something to ease one or two people in this tough time is better than nothing
she doesnt show any form of compassion for others and that sucks
its all greed

It's the Double Dyson saga all over again, she'd just repeat this:

Because she thinks she should be entitled to everything because she's HeLeN aNdErSoN - she doesn't need any of that shit from Sainsbury's, especially since she kept going on in her boremas spreadsheet vlog how she's calculated every single but of Christmas food to the crumb so she won't waste any, she wouldn't dream of gifting the food items back to Sainsbury's food bank, or do a giveaway for the extra Monopoly set, slippers and the other bits and bobs.

She's far too lazy to put work into her own content, I can't see her bothering with a giveaway unless it was run by a sponsored company which would do the work for her.

 

[Albert_Chris]

 

[Mykuf]

It's a recent development so don't worry! I only held off because I was waiting to get paid and the info was revealed the day before, aha. The donation isn't listed on their website and seems to have been actively hidden. I (and others) just personally plan to boycott until they properly apologize (as their current statement is shite), the company has also donated to pro-LGBTQ+ companies but it seems they have employees who are transphobic and made this donation.

More info here as I don't want derail the convo but fuck them until there's transparency and the employee involved is disciplined: https://www.pinknews.co.uk/2020/12/...ce-uk-grant-charity-pot-transphobia-backlash/



My point was more that it would be nice to see influencers take a stance and share this information rather than just accepting PR and keeping their mouth shut whilst posting vapid statements about supporting the trans community whilst doing nothing with their platform. Not necessarily aiming this at Helen as an individual but the fact she has a Lush haul coming up made me mention this and I do hope she speaks out.

can you please provide evidence that WPUK is transphobic? I’ve seen their website and I can’t find anything. Note: being in favour of retaining women’s hard fought for single sex spaces and not wanting to give children drugs isn’t transphobia.

 

[artieziff92]

The comments on the apology are so infuriating I wish I hadn’t read any. Maybe I’m alone in this, I don’t find the rules confusing at all. I’m not a fan of the current government, I don’t think they’re handling this perfectly, but I’m sick of seeing posts everywhere paraphrasing the rules and making them confusing. If you actually read the restrictions on the gov.uk website, they’re very clear. Several reputable news websites also have lists of scenarios that aren’t and are allowed.
Again, simply realising that the higher the tier, the higher the rates are, should be enough to have you avoiding the area for your own benefit at the very least.

100% agree with this. Not a fan of the government either, but it isn't difficult to look up the rules and follow them accordingly. Helen is nearly 30 years old and still doesn't fully understand the rules (apparently) or, you know, have a basic level of common sense. Yet when people have criticised her before she becomes a fountain of knowledge in terms of Covid-19 guidelines, funny that.

Back in October when London went into Tier 2, it meant that my boyfriend and I (not the same household/no support bubble) couldn't go out for the cinema trip/meal we'd planned for our anniversary. Did I think it was kind of silly that I could technically sit in a restaurant on my own and eat, surrounded by loads of other households, but couldn't sit in a restaurant and eat together with my boyfriend? Yes. Did I still follow the rules? Yes. Because I want all this to be over as soon as possible.

In my opinion, there is absolutely no excuse for breaking the rules because you didn't understand them. Literally just educate yourself Helen, it isn't hard.

 

[Lunamoon22]

Holy shit Who is this person? I'd love her to come over here and join the dark side if they're not here already

 

[luckyblue]

There are so many comments from Americans telling her it’s okay because things are worse over there. In-fucking-furiating. No that does not make it okay.

 

[Routron]

Places being open doesn't automatically mean you can go - they're open for people in the local area. Not for you to travel over 100 miles to go to. Such a lame excuse.

 

[Emmapism]

Remind you of anyone?

 

[kurb12]

Roughly added up everything Sainsburys gifted her - £100 approx

i don’t understand why she doesn't use these companies to help, if sainsburys gifted you something, why not see if you can work with them to do a giveaway for at least your UK followers, something to ease one or two people in this tough time is better than nothing
she doesnt show any form of compassion for others and that sucks
its all greed

 

[sorenips]

VIDEO SUMMARY:
Vlogmas Day 9
The Christmas Lush Haul​

Starting the vlog like yesterday - Helen sets up the camera and enters as if it's the first time she's come in to the room She's carrying a wool wreath and notices that there's crumbies on the kitchen side!

She's wearing her hair up again, I can't tell if she's doing this because we've mentioned her poor awful bald spot or what, but we're airing out the scalp again today.

So far she has edited yesterday's vlogmas "which was quite fun", she's been to see her osteopath "'ad sum crackin' n sum massaging for me poorly shawlda", and then she popped into Lush because she wanted to have a restock her Lush basket, but also because "It's Christmas and I just wanted some Lush Christmas stuuuuuufff!" she says in a weird voice and equally weird expression

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She's just had her lunch, and is now having her post lunch tea and TREAT! She's gonna have a cupcake from yesterday.

She's shouting out another small shop which has gifted her a pom pom wreath, and wire names for her dogs - Hmm, it seems like she will only shout out those who gift her free shit.

That's it for the shout outs for now, she's waddling off into the other room to pop her lovely gifted items into the other room while we wait for her to waddle back and do something interesting.

Fil's at home revising because he's got exams next week "it's all very, very exciting but slightly nerve wracking, but all good in the hood"

Now they're both tucking in to the cake "Yummy, yo ho ho! I can't eat those big things" she says about the sugar decoration, Fil mumbles something with a mouth full of cake. "they look nice, but they hurt my teef" says Helga, who probably see a dentist, "well they don't hurt my teef, but, ugh... just a bit hard" she says crunching on the decoration. She sounds really slow and dopey.

"You're doing really well, you know" she says to Fil, "I was expecting to come home and you'd be asleep"

"me too" mumbles Fil, as Helga laughs at him with a mouth full of cake

"Asleep at the table" Continues Fil

"You're sleeping with your eyes open" say Helen (they talk to each other like they're both 80 year olds)

They both then laugh and mumble shit we can't understand because they both love to talk with a mouthful of food.

Also what is this camera angle

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Before she carries on with the rest of her work day she's going to share with us what she got from Lush.

"Cos it's Christmas" and she loves getting a bunch of seasonal Lush shit every year

"The basic bitch in me has Snow Fairy from the 1st of December" - I fucking loathe her constantly calling shit "basic bitch", especially since she constantly tells people not to go by society standards, don't let society tell you what to do etc and if you like something just get it - she's creating this whole thing of being looked down upon just because she orders a PSL from Starbucks or just gets the most popular fragrance from a fucking soap shop, every time she says I roll my eyes, it's so fucking pathetic.

First out the Lush bag is.... a Yankee candle from Clinton's cards. Okay. It's called Warm and Cosy, "and it smells like it should, warm and cosy"

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I really wish she'd get her hair chopped off back into a bob, the other side of her hairline is just as awful. I can't believe she still claims she has loads of thick hair... actually she still claims she's a size 14... so maybe I shouldn't be so surprised.

From Lush she got..... well she's not sure because now she wishes she got the labels put on them so she knows what they're called. Clearly a very well thought out vlogmas here folks.

"First one we got here.... which is...... a..... bath bomb........... ugh I'm so sorry I'm a terrible Lush fan!" she says struggling to even remember the name of the first item, clearly not going to look it up on your phone and tell us then, Helga? Of course not. That would be TOO much work

She got this one for Fil because he's been such a good Kirby EGG and doing all his revising, oh she's complaining about her camera never being good at focusing on anything. This is quality content. She's now counting to 11 to try and get it to focus, yep she included the counting part and it's finally focused "Great. Nice one." she says.

She sniffs the bath bomb "smells very Lush"

She's allowing Fil to treat himself to a lovely bath after he's done all his revision. Because she has to control how Fil treats himself by doing the shit she likes doing.

We're going through the other 7 Lush shite she got (she automatically went to eat one of the bath bombs instead of smelling it)

She's now going to have to have a bath before bed as she has a lot on her mind and is having rubbish sleep.

She's rubbish at describing what these things smell like "I can't describe it... very calming... a strong smell... but a relaxing smell...."

She likes her fresher smelling bath bombs for her day bath, and calming ones for her night bath....

Apparently she ALWAYS has a "barf" on a Saturday. Tonight she's going to have one then Fil's going to have one.

She's now off to do some work, so will catch us later.

Cut to later and she's running a bath and we get to watch her fill up her bath basket with all her gifted Body Shop bubble bath and all her Lush stuff she bought

Now we get to sit with her while she's naked in the bath. Fun. She's found a chilled album to listen to, she blares it on her phone

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"GOODBYE!!!!" she yells over the music.

That's it.

Yes! The basic bitch thing is so incredibly cringe. And I clocked her deciding how and when FIL would relax. Ultimate control, all the time. All under the guise of "treating him". Lovebombing once again with the shower gel as well, she constantly buys men shit, she reeks of desperation.

Edited to add: she also ALWAYS lists the things she's bought/done (and I don't mean her boring YouTube hauls). The video someone posted earlier in the thread where she brings Matt a bowl of sweets, she lists all the fucking sweets in it. But she does that with everything she gives people (side note - anyone else remember the suitcase of clothes she gave to Matt?) And she films them receiving things from her. The listing things you've got/done for people to remind them of it is another classic narcissist trait.

 

[microwavequeen]

I haven't even bothered to watch any of her vlogmas, just been reading @Lunamoon22 's roundups! But I clicked on this new one, and I have to say.

Why the fuck is she wearing a mic for the entire thing? Even while exercising? All I can fucking here is her snorting and breath.

I cringed when she walked into bootcamp and left the camera outside. Would have loved to see Kats face when she turned around and went straight back outside for it after screeching HELLOOOoOoooOoo

 

[Routron]

The bar is so low for some of these people... Ridiculous praise in the comments for such a half-arsed apology.

 

[tsuyu]

Her vlogmas content has just been
I thought tonights was meant to be the weekend+monday??
All she did was make a wreath for the second time this month Man, I wish I could put as little effort into my job as she does

 

[boo5432]

I work with flowers and all I can say about her wreath is...you tried hunny. She thinks because she's been on so many courses she is now a qualified florist. That's another lie for your cv darling!

I know that was very naughty and bitchy of me, I think she upset me with her deleting comments spree