Helen Anderson #19 overfed, her subscribers are dead

[navybluewolf]

Video Summary- NEW THINGS- Asos & Amazon and more!

Description: Here’s some new things that I have accumulated recently!

As always, we have a secondary video title and our favourite kettle
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'Good morning, good day, good evening'
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'I'm in my erm, this sort of erm, it's not a dressing gown, it's not sold as a dressing gown it's sold as like err I'm not entirely sure'. Excellent, off to a good start.
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Helen says she hasn't done a lot of shopping over the last year and hasn't bought herself much. My eyes glaze over as I remember the two new vacuum cleaners, the air fryer, the ipad, the handbags, the newly decorated bedroom..... she's saying she doesn't feel the desire to buy things. Yet here we are with a haul!

'The first thing is this from H&M'

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She might make a few adjustments to it... it's come undone. Yes that's her stomach, no she isn't dressed properly. She has visions of wearing it over jeans with loads of jewels (???) 'Just kewl'. So far she's only worn it round the house like a dressing gown.

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It's cool and glamorous and fits in with the bedroom

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The next thing is her bag

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She acknowledges her Matt and Nat bag that we mentioned here. It ticked all the boxes but it was bulky and uncomfortable to carry. She also had a problem with her shoulder.

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She was thinking about tote bags but they're just empty space and satchels have too many buckles.

She says she was looking at designer bags but wasn't sure if she wanted to spend that much money (don't tell her Prada, LV or Gucci!).

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So, with her shoulder problem in mind she bought a sensible backpack!

ONLY KIDDING, it's another over the shoulder black bag

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It's from John Lewis, it's a black bag. Helen likes it.

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She's excited for this next one....

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'Fluffy Ugg sliders, errrrrmygaad'

Apparently Phil thinks they're disgusting

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'I'm a huge fan of the Ugg slipper', she shows us her slippers just in case we don't believe her

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'They're worn in but they're still so great'

Apparently the new ones are like a summery house slipper shoe sandal. She says she wouldn't wear tham out but maybe accidentally to Tesco to buy milk and Chicago town pizza and Ben and Jerrys. Weirdly specific for an accident but OK, sure. Phil actually likes them and Helen wonders why men always underestimate us. Asking the big questions today....

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Helen is ecstatic with her purchase but I'm not so enthralled, NEXT.

'Next purchase. Amazon.'

She sings 'I bought a lap tray, I bought a lap tray'
(Is this what they're called? Genuine question, I've never heard someone call this a 'lap tray'.)

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She shows us this gem again 'look how happy I am!'. That posture...

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Apparently she bought this BECAUSE she had bad posture when working in bed and on the sofa. Are we meant to have forgotten that she literally has an office with a desk and a chair?!

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It has a cup holder, a tablet holder and a snack drawer

She demonstrates using it. Apparently it looked nicer on the picture but she doesn't care. Helen laughs about Hannah Witton starting to work in an office and how she's regressing from using an office to working in bed.

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'I got, from Amazon, some condiment bottles'

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Helen sees herself as being a condiment queen 'a very saucey lady' but sometimes she wants a squeezy bottle because she just wants a bit of sauce.
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She mentions her Leon sauces. She's going to get her label maker, make some labels and decant some sauce which will save space in her 'SAUCE CADDY!' she shrieks that part, not sure why.

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'That's some stuff, then just some cloving bits'

First up, an inoffensive white dress from Monki

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Someone in Lush told her she was the most stylish person they'd seen all day.

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Off to a promising start with the clothes

'UGGGGHH THESE AREN'T DRY' she sniffs the next garment

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Helen leaves Phil a voice note telling him that the clothes they left on the line for a few days in the rain aren't dry. 'It's just not dry and it's all musty. I'm gonna have to wash it all. It's not good'.

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Anyway, it's some PJs from H&M

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She got some band t shirts, because if there's one thing Helen needs it's more band t shirts!

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Sorry, I'm whizzing through this final stretch. She got a top and some jeans from Asda

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She then says she's got smock dresses on her mind and they're all she wants to wear. Good job she didn't just buy more jeans then- oh wait.

(OK I actually think this one looks really nice, the colour goes so well with her complexion and hair)

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More dresses..... (Sorry I'm bored with all the sack dresses)
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Helen tells us that dresses are really nice to skate in 'obviously with your safety gear on'. Oh how I laughed.

Apparently she's going out to get shit faced on cocktails with her friend who also has the black and orange dress. She keeps describing material as being 'bumpy and waffley' and saying she doesn't know what it is, but doesn't think to just read the label.


'It looks like I spent loads on Asos' she says as she pulls out the next item. Fans of the white boots will LOVE THIS.....

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'Patent brown boots'

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Her and Dani noticed the top is quite narrow and wonder if people don't have legs any more. She asks where peoples ankles have gone.

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Helen confirms that these do zip up but she's going to have to wear them a lot and do lots of squats (???).

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The last thing she got 'mainly for the LOLs' are what she describes as Del Boy glasses.

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Anyway, she's got a nail appointment, she's got work to do, a therapy session, she should get dressed and make some sauce labels. No rest for the wicked ey?

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'YEEEAH that's the plan for today. Au revoir mon amis'.

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That's the end.

Her bedroom is so dark, I hate it. It looks like a French bordello, the sort that Parisian artists die in.

 

[miss tree]

I’m not her target audience. I’ve never been influenced to purchase anything she has talked about or promoted. I no longer subscribe to any of her social media. Yet she lingers in my mind...like a car crash you can’t turn away from I keep waiting for her to mature just a bit! Do something selfless. I don’t think it will happen. By age 30 most of us have a direction in life that sustains our mental health.. a career..a hobby.. children...anything to be passionate about. She is completely shallow! If FOOD is her thing..then go at it whole hog! Go beyond the chips and nandos. Do some research! Don’t just half arse being a vegetarian and not make it through one day! She used to supposedly like to plan things ( or was that just to get free stuff from paper chase?) I’m wondering what I ever saw in her.

 

[dailydoseofwhat]

Saw this and thought of Helen…

 

[Amy1232]

Did she actually just comment saying she doesn't look at things in an instagramable way? Has she seen her Instagram? Her weekend round ups? Is she OK? Everyone of her pictures is posed and clearly thought out

 

[9961]

Who the fuck leaves their washing hanging out when it’s raining? She’s a creep

 

[AsterSalonen]

Businesses have to move with the times to stay relevant. If they want to survive that is.

Love it or hate it, some people want to take stylised photos of themselves to tell people what they are up to. Some people even make a career out of such things...ahem.

 

[CapnPancakes]

That picture is famous. If she made any bit of effort in anything other than her eating, drinking, and rule breaking, she could google it and get a print of it easily. It literally took me the time to type it into google and go to images to find it. It’s the 6th one down.
Idiot.
*i refuse to link it or screenshot it or even say what I searched here, cos screw you helen, find it yourself ya bum*

 

[Emmapism]

Wow so she's STILL reading here eh!

Therapy is going well.

Also, what views?

 

[Influensters]

Was away for a wee while, my husband is in a band and I have been on tour (lmao how lame does that sound, hopefully I meet Soonoi Bouys or whatever her band is called) and it’s nice to see Helen is still a complete ballsack. Back to her old tricks.

hope everyone is well, no sign of Luna ay?

 

[ktypage]

I reckon Leon only gave her a few free bottles just to shut her up! They’re probably as fed up with it as we are

 

[Tom_Nook]

So in the weekend roundup they hired a van to go to Alton towers (gifted of course) there were 8 of them in the van, 4 different house holds. Is this allowed now? I thought it was still groups of 6 but I have no idea or is it only groups of 6 indoors? In which case, would a van count View attachment 617581View attachment 617582View attachment 617597

It's groups of 6 indoors...... logic dictates that a van is an enclosed space so avoiding having 8 people in there seems like common sense. If having two vehicles wasn't an option then I'd at least hope they had the windows down and masks on, but I can see that they didn't. Excellent work as always. Let's get that R number back up.

 

[Influensters]

Helen’s vulva in them pants be like

 

[Jemimapuddleduck12]

Has she seen her own house?

Exactly, she has an Instagram account dedicated to her home decor. She’s full of shite.

 

[Emmapism]

Helen acting like she's never gotten a dislike on her videos before. YouTubers get this all the time and say nothing. Quite often it's bots or just randos.

Imagine being so preoccupied with such a small thing. Again, therapy is obviously really really helping her with all of these issues. Great work.

 

[leelaloola]

I find it quite confusing and sad that I ever took inspiration from her.

I hope she sorts her life out though, it just seems sad. Constantly vying for validation and attention. What a sad little life Jane.
*im aware I’ve said sad a lot

 

[rivers]

Decanting sauces already in bottles, into other bottles and then making labels for said bottles? Someone really has wayyyy too much time on their hands.

ETA make your own damn sauces “Condiment Queen” , you clearly have the time and now the bottles

Omg, people do this all the time on IG home accounts and it's literally one of my pet hates. a) The best before date is gone now and you're mixing old with new product if you refill, and b) you're just producing more rubbish unless you fill those jars from a no waste shop, which I highly doubt most of these people are.

Slightly off topic rant bc it's not really a grievance with Helen but omg just use the containers they come in, who gives a shit if it's slightly more unsightly inside your cupboards?

 

[Emmapism]

still maintain that this relationship will not last but hey what do we know. It's not like we were right about Maff....

 

[Bluelipstick]

I stayed in a beautiful hotel in Greece that had little Instagram logos on the floor dotted around as ‘great place for a selfie’. I didn't think it was wanky, it was a genuinely lovely place and I got some nice pictures from there.

 

[navybluewolf]

Helen needs to stop navel gazing and get on with herself. She doesn't have a stressful job or kids or elderly parents to care for. She's so desperate not be alone she has to call her friend for a video. Literally can't be alone for one day.
And put your fucking arse away. Looks like porridge in a string bag.

 

[Tom_Nook]

Instagrammable restaurants literally exist BECAUSE OF people like Helen. Influencers breed this shit.... is she that dense?!