Gabriella Lindley #57 100k richer but everyone's ditched her

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Just speaking for myself but personally, I ignore the Gabby's dad discussions. It always goes around and around in circles, somebody always wants to see his tweets, people go too far, everybody says the same thing and it's basically almost as much like groundhog day as Gabby's life has been for the last five years.
 
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Are you kidding me? You're a genius! Im still chortling at all the song titles on your albums.
You’re better at coming up with the lyrics for a whole song though haha. I get bored after the first verse and run out of things to rhyme
 
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Steve!! *sighs wistfully*

 
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You’re better at coming up with the lyrics for a whole song though haha. I get bored after the first verse and run out of things to rhyme
We need to get our fiveheads together and collab!
 
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It’s Christmas time,
Gobby is afraid
It’s Christmas time
There’s more sunlight and less shade

in her world of plenty (of cat shit bags)
She makes no plans to spread joy
Put your arms around nelly
A Christmas time

but say a prayer
For gabboon and jewniper mewn
At Christmas time
It’s hard
When you purposely miss out on family events!

there’s a world outside your moldy windew
If only you weren't so terrified
Of socialising and making friends
Instead she eats food that is fried

So tonight thank god it’s her
Instead of you.

There won’t be masks worn in tkmaxx
This Christmas time
The greatest gift gaboon will get
Is ham
Ohhhhhhhhh

Where she shits in shoe boxes
Makes up fake illnesses

does she know you’re allowed outside at all!?


And that’s all I have
 
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Brilliant! Christmas number 1!!
 
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Saw this before and I think I’m just sew sew used to these threads that I read it in Gabby’s voice instantly
 
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I'm honestly just waiting for the Christmas meltdown with crying insta stories, passive aggressive posts or her being holier than thou when she sees people get together for the holidays.
 
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Last Christmas, I spent on my own
And the very next year,
I’m still sitting here.
This year, to save me from tears
I going to sort my shop out

Last Christmas I painted my walls,
with over priced paint, It’s farrow and ball
But this year, to save me from tears
I’m going to sort my seconds (seconds)

Once bitten, twice shyyy
I didn’t bite it, it’s just a vicious lie
Tell me tattle, do you just despise me
Well, I’ve been a cunt, it doesn’t surprise me

Happy Christmas, Jane wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying have a wash, you meant it.
now I know what a tramp I’ve been
Should go and have a bath,
And Get myself nice and clean

Last Christmas, I didn’t have a tree,
But the very next day, I had fucking THREE!
This year, to save me from tears
I’m staying at home in Brighton.

Last Christmas, was just me and Nel
Poor cats got no choice, he thinks he’s in hell
But this year, to save him from tears
I’m going to feed him chewwnaaaa

ohhhhh,
ohhhh Nelly
Oooohhhhhh

Crowded shops, men are all vile
I’m hiding from them, in the gravy isle
My god I thought you were, supposed to have a mask on
Me, I guess I’m full of shit so don’t wear one.

I’ll block you on Twitter, then delete all my tweets
A troll undercover, and you tore me apart
Ooh ohh now you’ve made a new account
You’re gonna troll me again.

Last Christmas I spent on my own
Cos my dad is a twat,
who lives in Janes home
This year, to save me from tears
I’ll just sl@g him off on tik tok
Last Christmas etc etc etc repeat to fade
 
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Infinitely better than anything I could ever come up with! You’re brilliant hahaha got me cackling

I especially like the reference to Chai and the teeth story Genius!

Surely if Gabby was staying home over Xmas/new year she could keep wrapping and posting? Seems a bit strange is all.
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That was her whole excuse to not go to her parents. Silly us. She’ll be in bed till 2pm get up, eat beige food and watch friends for the millionth time.
 
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I think that also applies for about 80% of what's in this thread
 
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