Father of Daughters #55 His luggage is smarter than he is

[skronkywildcat]

Jeez, imagine you’re a nice normal polite Japanese waiter and this dusty swivel-eyed corpse person is bellowing MOSHI MOSHI ARIGATO in your face whist brandishing his pretend-free Google pixel phone at you.

You’d be forgiven for shoving him face-first into a bowl of hot ramen.

 

[Fruitshop]

“Dusty swivel-eyed corpse person” has made my morning

 

[edgeofseventeen]

Jeez, imagine you’re a nice normal polite Japanese waiter and this dusty swivel-eyed corpse person is bellowing MOSHI MOSHI ARIGATO in your face whist brandishing his pretend-free Google pixel phone at you.

You’d be forgiven for shoving him face-first into a bowl of hot ramen.

Skronky you're on form today!

Petulant little man baby and dusty swivel-eyed corpse person! Next two thread titles right there.

 

[Rosieee]

Yeah I think both siblings works with formula 1 and actually made a career for themselves that does not include relying on your offspring privacy for freebies. Good for them!

 

[Emmadale]

Imagine how much the dynamic of a trip would be ruined changed if Simon were on it:

1. Making countless photos and videos of himself EVERYWHERE they go
2. Embarrassing monologues and actions on camera in public (esp. the ones where he'll add text later)
3. Only interested in "instagrammable" settings
4. Moaning about the cost of everything but also belittling others on a budget
5. Pretending he's the main expert on the place the entire time, and the lead person generally
6. Wankily pretending he understands the language and insisting he doesn't look like a tourist, while making awkward google lens translations
7. Constantly revelling in the fact that Clemmie's "stuck at home with the kids"
8. Comparing it unfavourably to previous times he was in that part of the world
9. Being a dick to service staff and/or trying to use them for content
10. Subjecting everyone to his moods and his face, and those jeans

You’ve forgotten delaying the flight while he gets chucked off

 

[Axatogrind]

You’ve forgotten delaying the flight while he gets chucked off

That's a good one!

The list is endless, so I missed lots of things

I tried to come up with something about him ignorantly making a cultural faux-pas (or three) in Japan, but failed.

By the way, has he removed the insta stories about his siblings' trip? I swear those weren't up for 24 hours?!

 

[infragram]

Sharing someone else’s holiday photos … imagine sitting making a montage of a holiday you AREN'T EVEN ON to share as content. Sorry, I know this is yesterdays news, but I’m just baffled by how it is in any way relevant to his life. Well, it’s not relevant to his life.

He is so irrelevant now. Absolutely grasping at straws sharing those Japan stories and old videos of the twins. Since he is devoid of any appealing personality traits it will be difficult for him to carve a living out of featuring himself.

Dad Simon
Husband Simon
Fitness Simon
Sober-curious Simon
Resentful Simon
DIY enthusiast Simon
Mental Health Advocate Simon
Travelling Simon
Poor me my daughter is diabetic Simon
Fridge gate Simon
“Since you asked here’s affiliate links to Clemmies fast fashion wardrobe” Simon


Dunno what else to add to the list. He has no continuity, and his personality is just bogging. What could be next? Here’s some ideas for you you massive prick….

Self diagnosed ADHD Simon
Just for Men Hairdye Simon
LGBTQ ally Simon
Political Simon
Housing a refugee family for content Simon
Frugal recipes Simon
Eco Simon
Monetising the dogs Simon - surprised they’ve made so few appearances on the gram

By the way, has he removed the insta stories about his siblings' trip? I swear those weren't up for 24 hours?!

He’s defo removed them. Weren’t up for a day.
Hope they tore him a new one for sharing their private photos. Add to list - Family Estrangement Simon

 

[Rosieee]

My brother is a long-haul pilot and leaves a pretty glamorous life. I cannot even begin to imagine how embarrassing it would be for me to share his pictures on my Instagram I'm also very happy that he's living the dream I've been hearing of since he was a toddler. Envy and jealousy are some very ugly feelings and obviously consuming FOD slowly. He's so bitter.

 

[Axatogrind]

Gosh, look at these files I found in my browser cache from last night

New lock screen, anyone?

Now you don't have to feel like you're missing out, Simon! You're welcome!

 

[Lipsofchicken]

This thread makes me laugh out loud, it’s brilliant. Peoples observations and commentary is so funny

 

[infragram]

Gosh, look at these files I found in my browser cache from last night

View attachment 1647127

New lock screen, anyone?

View attachment 1647153

Now you don't have to feel like you're missing out, Simon! You're welcome!

View attachment 1647166

oh my God you made me spit out my water … so feckin funny He’s such a weapon

 

[OhMyWord]

My brother is a long-haul pilot and leaves a pretty glamorous life. I cannot even begin to imagine how embarrassing it would be for me to share his pictures on my Instagram I'm also very happy that he's living the dream I've been hearing of since he was a toddler. Envy and jealousy are some very ugly feelings and obviously consuming FOD slowly. He's so bitter.

I have a family member who is a diplomat and currently living abroad in what is considered a “hardship posting.” So they get to leave where they are about once per month - the photos of where they have been are amazing. Like I’m getting travel ideas. There is not an ounce of me planning to post their photos on bleeping IG complaining that I’m not there.

They were def taken down before 24hrs. So now the over/under is WHO compelled them to be taken down? our options as follows:

Siblings, who are old enough to understand consent (Sly is used to not bothering since the girls don’t get it)

Mom, from her silent Buddhist retreat, of course.

Dad, who I have no witty comment for. Hence it’s prob wasn’t him.

Glen, who’s embarrassed that her husband always wants to be anywhere that she and the girls aren’t.

Sly himself, who realised how much of an idiot he looked like.

 

[Rosieee]

His family hates him. His mum was on a bleeping silent retreat for his 40th birthday party his siblings are asking him to remove their holidays pics, his wife is dreaming of a real man who doesn't wear lycra and his daughters are heading straight to estrangement from him. At what point does he realise enough is enough and maybe he should work on those relationships rather then on his dying Instagram page?

 

[Emmadale]

I bet the food post he’s replaced his siblings and piglets with us because he’s going to say he’s got an airfryer! They’re the latest bandwagon (not knocking it as I have one myself) so I can imagine he’ll be all over it like he’s the first person to think of it!

 

[Hatchet_job]

I have a family member who is a diplomat and currently living abroad in what is considered a “hardship posting.” So they get to leave where they are about once per month - the photos of where they have been are amazing. Like I’m getting travel ideas. There is not an ounce of me planning to post their photos on bleeping IG complaining that I’m not there.

They were def taken down before 24hrs. So now the over/under is WHO compelled them to be taken down? our options as follows:

Siblings, who are old enough to understand consent (Sly is used to not bothering since the girls don’t get it)

Mom, from her silent Buddhist retreat, of course.

Dad, who I have no witty comment for. Hence it’s prob wasn’t him.

Glen, who’s embarrassed that her husband always wants to be anywhere that she and the girls aren’t.

Sly himself, who realised how much of an idiot he looked like.

The Japanese Tourist Board?

 

[Antonina]

Thing is his brother was prob in Japan on a work trip (given his job) so it’s not professional for that head Simon to be sharing pictures of his brothers business trip

 

[Rosieee]

The guy has lost sight of what is profesionaly acceptable years ago.

 

[Carole_Baskin]

Hi, longtime lurker never commented but just wanted to say, worth having a look at Kelechi Okafor's Instagram @kelechnekoff. 4th post on the grid, clip of a recent podcast she has done about the experiences of black women, haven't had chance to listen to the full episode but in the clip she mentions Clemmie. Posted 20hours ago!

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Hi, longtime lurker never commented but just wanted to say, worth having a look at Kelechi Okafor's Instagram @kelechnekoff. 4th post on the grid, clip of a recent podcast she has done about the experiences of black women, haven't had chance to listen to the full episode but in the clip she mentions Clemmie. Posted 20hours ago!

Honestly if it wasn’t for Kelechi the truth would never, ever have gotten any traction and Clemmie would still be here telling new mums they need £300 jumpsuits to breastfeed and FOD wouldn’t be constantly whinging about money and looking like an extra from the mummy.

I’m hopeful that she seems optimistic that the midwifery board (??) will actually investigate it and may even take her pin tho?

Top comments -

 

[Axatogrind]

Thanks for the tip @Carole_Baskin

If the NMC has been comfortable for Clemmie to continue in midwifery for the last three years, I can't see them removing her now.

Even if a hearing (or whatever) is taking its time to get to the top of the pile, she'll presumably be able to point to the 3+ years and use it in her favour.

Not saying it's right, and I have no idea how the NMC operates.

It should have been investigated at the time. I don't think there was even a comment, despite her very publicly bringing the profession into disrepute?