A few other quotes:
1."I got a buzz from buying something in a size 10 rather than XXXL". And lots more choice phrases where that came from. Really disappointed that a midwife of all people has written a body shaming and sexist book that is meant to be ‘humourous’ but is actually quite damaging.
2.My sister bought me this book as a gift when I announced my pregnancy. Looking at the book, it's appearance is quite appealing. And the fact that the author is – or was – a midwife with four children of her own gave me the impression that she must be experienced in all things pregnancy and labour related and have a lot of information and knowledge to share. But I soon found out that this wasn't a week-by-week pregnancy book that I could really rely on, and it left me disappointed chapter after chapter knowing I would have to wait 2 or 4 or up to 6 weeks to be able to relate to the next stage of pregnancy that the author decided to highlight. It was one of the reasons why I put the book down so many times. During your pregnancy, there is something interesting happening every single week, and it seemed that I learned more about what was happening to my body and my growing baby by using a free pregnancy app over this book, which is says a lot really. The author's views are old-fashioned in some ways and the use of shaming language in regards to women's bodies during and after pregnancy threw me off a little too; it just didn't sound all that professional. There was a lot I didn't necessarily agree with, that made me cringe and overall question if the author was truly a midwife. So I decided to research the author's name and WOW! Let's just say it revealed the author to be someone who I would NEVER personally buy a book from or support their business. I chose not to read the rest of it and since then I have purchased other pregnancy books and found them to be much more informative, insightful and incredibly empowering in every single aspect of pregnancy, labour and the journey afterward. I’m just glad this was gift and not a purchase of my own. And knowing all that I know about the author, it doesn’t feel right keeping it, passing it on or recommending it to other mums-to-be. So, it’s the bin for this one I’m afraid.
3.
I was so disappointed with this book. We are starting to think about trying for a baby sometime within the next year or two and I bought this with the hope that it would provide some solid advice for a first time parent to be. However, the book is laid out more like a magazine than a book; the articles within are all light and with no real depth to them. A lot of the content feels like filler to pad the book out (e.g., recipes, large illustrations etc) and I was disappointed that I learned pretty much nothing I didn't know already (which is not a lot considering this is only the second book on pregnancy I've bought).
The thing that disappointed me the most was the subtle sexist and body-shaming undertones that snuck in throughout the book. Some examples:
- Apparently a 'plus point' of pregnancy is that you don't have to worry about holding in your tummy anymore
- In the same section it talked about pregnancy being a great excuse to 'convince your partner you need new threads' (I'm an adult woman with a career; I do not need my husband's permission to buy new clothes, especially if I am growing a baby and no longer fit in my usual clothes!)
- In the section about finding out the sex of the baby it talks about gendered clothes being a plus and a minus of finding out the sex (e.g., you can buy the 'right' colour ahead of time, or you can reuse white and yellow clothes for a future baby if you don't find out ahead of time). It never considers that maybe the woman does not want to enforce gender norms on their unborn child and doesn't give a toss about buying gendered clothes for their child even if they do know the sex ahead of time.
- In the top tips for partners it says that men should consider making a meal once a week! Weekly?! They should be doing their fair share of the housework normally, let alone when their partner is growing a baby inside them.
-In the same section it suggests men should do a bit more round the house and that they should do that because the benefit is that your partner doesn't whinge at you! How about men should be doing their share because THEY LIVE THERE AND ARE FULLY GROWN ADULTS, not because they won't get whinged at.
- Some body hair shaming content; "you've probably not even had a basic wax in months". Stop making removing all your body hair through a painful procedure the 'norm'.
- Women put weight on their back, abdomen and thighs; "the places us women are always trying to shift it from". Fat shaming isn't fun to read, especially in regards to pregnancy!
- Apparently an essential is to take a mirror in your hospital bag for the purposes of, and I quote, "check your reflection before in-laws arrive". Who gives a damn what you look like when you've just had a baby? If your in laws care then that's their problem, not yours!
- More body shaming: you should have a pedicure so that when you look down you're looking at your toes and not your "saggy belly".
And finally the last bit of body shaming: That with a bit of time and work your post baby body will "eventually look marginally more acceptable". Because apparently fat or not-toned bodies are not acceptable to this author. Good to know.
