My two youngest went to grammar school. I had no intention or thought of it (thus my poor eldest went to the local comp) but a teacher approached me and said you really should look at getting Dogmuck junior to sit the exams for GS because she’s smart and will really thrive. I talked to Mr DM about it and we said ok let’s do it. Lots of my mum friends were like have you got a tutor and I’m like NO do I need one? I was honestly super naive. They were all getting tutors and I said, look if she’s smart enough she’ll pass and if she’s not then no biggy she can go to the comp like her brother. Everyone was badgering me saying, these exams aren’t things they cover at school they are very specific, you have to get a tutor. I didn’t, it was a hill that I was prepared to die on. NGL as the exams and results loomed I did worry I’d been a dick and all these fretting mothers were right. They weren’t, DM junior passed all the entrance exams for all the GS cos she was a smart little
tit and still is. I applied the same principle with my youngest and got the same results. Many of my fretty mum friends kids didn’t pass the exams didn’t get into GS and they either ended up paying for crap private schools or went to the comp. So all that stress for EVERYONE in the house and all that cost was for nowt.
Kids don’t need more study and more pressure. Hot housing them does not make for a calm house. I’ve seen this with my brothers kids who were basic geniuses as toddlers, whilst mine just looked vacant and dribbled. His kids are now really struggling with mental illnesses and I think that was down to the pressure they have constantly been under to be the best (privately educated at a top private school).
Parents are quite often responsible for the pressure because they are either competing with their mates/family or projecting their desires on to their kids. Maybe I got lucky with mine but if I had one piece of advice it’s that kids learn at different paces and thrive in different environments. I would certainly ask the teacher if they think your kid is capable/would benefit from a GS environment because it’s not for everyone and if you’re pushing your kid down that road and it’s not their road they will almost certainly fail. The teachers will know best and you should listen to their advice and not be a child about it. Nobody suggested my eldest should sit any exams, far from it, but he thrived at the comp and did well, he wouldn’t have made it at a GS cos basically he’s a lazy git
). I can’t imagine what it would have been like having my parents going public with the issue. Them telling their friends over dinner party about my antics was already mortifying enough. He’s creating so many mental issues for them it’s very sad to watch. Posting a picture of your daughter studying and struggling is NOT OK.
) but he’s done fine and has a better paid job than me in import/export 
