I have a friend whose been in a 'relationship' with a man for 11 years, whilst he's been with someone else. They met before he met his partner, stopped for a year or so when he met her and my friend met someone but have continued it ever since. My friend is now single and has been for a long time. They message pretty much constantly in the day when they are in work & when his partner goes to bed at night. They sleep together at least twice a month and apparently 'have a bond like she's never experienced with anyone else'. I've given up even telling her how wrong this is and how much hurt she would cause to his partner if she were to find out because whilst she realises she's doing wrong, she says she can't and won't ever be able to end it unless he does. I've never been cheated on, as far as I'm aware previously so can only imagine the devastating impact it can have. I came across the partners Instagram a few weeks ago & her photos scream happy, committed relationship, lovey dovey posts from her calling him her person etc. I felt awful even seeing it but I'm not going to get involved.
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Oh gosh how awful! It will come out one day it always does!
Tell the wife. Sorry but your friend is a piece of tit, as is the guy.
I agree, its terrible. Whilst I feel its awful what's happening and I hope it does come out one day, I'm not going to be the one to let it out. I don't want that responsibility on my shoulders and wish my friend had never told me to be honest. We've had many a disagreement over it but she says 'you'll never understand unless you're involved in it'. That will never be me. I don't wish to understand it
QUOTE="Comewhinewithme, post: 9460332, member: 129096"]
No I'm still here, that was the 1st time I was referring too.
At the minute I am working on leaving, obviously I've things to put in place x
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Good for you
Does he know your on your way out?
No I'm still here, that was the 1st time I was referring too.
At the minute I am working on leaving, obviously I've things to put in place x
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Good for you
Does he know your on your way out?I understand people have feelings and tit but how is your friend not thinking logically about this? They have a great “relationship” yet he’s never left his wife? He can sleep with her a few times a month but won’t commit 100% to her? Why is her self esteem so low? Not being rude with you because you haven’t done anything just putting my thoughts out there x
I really couldn't tell you. She's a pretty girl, got a lot going for her and doesn't come across or seem insecure etc. I feel like she's under his spell. He's not married to his partner, not engaged, just in a relationship however may aswell be as they live together etc, no kids thankfully. I feel exactly the same way as yourself, she just won't take telling. I'm completely against cheating or being involved with someone whose in a relationship and I very much feel sorry for the girlfriend. My friend just will not end it, it's as if she's waiting for him and he's clearly not going to leave his partner.
sorry I must have read it wrong and assumed they were married. The sad thing is she could have met the “one” by now but she’s still holding on to this guy.
Exactly, 11 years she's wasted on this man. She's 31 years old now. No children and she's just clinging on to someone who goes to bed with another woman every night, has built a life with her and not my friend and she just won't give him up. Its quite sad really.
11 years. duck!
That’s really sad, but even if he left his gf she’d never be able to trust him she knows what he’s capable of x
Oh agreed. If they'll cheat with you, they'll cheat on you.
11 years? Jesus. Your mate is a mug. That guy must be laughing his head off - 2 women on the go and one of them is fully aware of the situation and goes to bed with him regardless….
That’s so true!
Oh come on. You can’t be serious? What you’re doing is scummy and that’s my opinion. You’re totally disrespecting your partner and this guys wife. They deserve so much better. The truth will come out, it always does but I just hope they’re not destroyed by the truth.
I thought it was a reasonable question. Wasn't comparing myself to MLK, but a previous poster said anyone who cheats is rum. When I pointed this out they clarified "in the context of relationships they were rum". I have at least 4 family members who've cheated in full blown sexual affairs, 1 is a nasty piece of work, 2 are ok but not great, and 1 is a great person. I don't think their adultery sums up the whole person. I'm not justifying their choices just saying I know the people long enough and had enough experiences with them to judge their character, and life's a bit more complex than that.
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Stop trying to imply that you are some sort of great person!!!!! Take some responsibility for yourself. Grow up, stop messing around with a married man. Jesus Christ, find some self respect.
You know sweet FA about my life, what I've done, what I do every day and what kind of person I am. Suppose you're an angel are you?
I’ve never cheated on my partner. You have. It doesn’t matter a duck about anything else. You are doing something shady and wrong and that’s on you. You can’t seem to be able to comprehend that at all.
I'd just ignore those tbh who think life is black and white, your opinion will never be heard. It would be nice to be that naive but I live in the real world
Why it matters to others what a complete stranger does & get so worked up about it calling you names etc is beyond me.