Emmylou Loves #38 Staycay at the plywood, dressin like a slurry, 20kg gone thanks to laxatives and durries

[Director of Mugs]

I think it's repulsive this bush pig scooted off to get her teeth cleaned and her Invisalign sorted AGAIN because she is too lazy to wear them which we all knew but her blaming 'dating' yet saying The Receptionist has seen her on stories not wearing them?! So which is it?! On stories you aren't dating dickehead. And if out for a 'date' (which you aren't) you can still wear them for approx 20 hours that day. You are just a lazy pig.

Not only that, but she then went back to the Loreal event to get a free Manicure which in turn made her miss picking up her kids?! All for a free Manicure?! Get your priorities sorted you bleeping oaf. Pick your kids up, sort out dinner, take them out, spend time with them that isn't #gifted.

Truly she should be ashamed of herself. Imagine the absolute train wreck if and when she gets a bloke.

Yes!! I thought the same thing. Why would you want to go back?

She really has no idea.

I know I'm late but this outfit actually would have looked a lot cuter with sneakers, and with a white T SHIRT COVERING HER BELLY tucked into the jeans with a nice statement belt.

She can invest in a good pair of wide fit boots. Loreal would hear her before they see her in those clunky shoes.

 

[Super Cute]

@Super Cute not sure if this was shared, but you got another mention.

View attachment 1506217

How did I miss this?!!
Keep ma name out yo mouth!!

 

[posty post]

@Super Cute every time you say keep my name out of you mouth I die of laughter hahahahahah it’s the new stepped in dog tit to me

 

[icouldofsizeddown]

Why is food always gorgeous or delicious, food is meant to fuel your body, it’s for nutrition and energy.
Not meant to be covered in oil and butter

 

[emmygluewho]

Yes!! I thought the same thing. Why would you want to go back?

She really has no idea.



She can invest in a good pair of wide fit boots. Loreal would hear her before they see her in those clunky shoes.

She just comes off as such a grifting seagull that will literally take anything. Not only that but then goes back for more! Like that Clarkes thing?! Yesterday?! She has no shame in taking tit for free. It's bleeping embarrassing.

She goes to every single movie premiere?! Does she realise it is just bums on seats?! Yet here we have photographers 'Hi Emmy!' Thats not normal you flog. That they KNOW YOU like that. She dresses up like it's the bleeping Oscars. and looks like an absolute dumbass to a FREE EVENT all to get seen.

 

[OhMyLou]

The face T see's when she is on top.

Sorry, I'll see myself out.

dead but you’re assuming she can get up to begin with… I’ll join you and move on out for the morning

 

[gemmagucci]

Thanks for the new thread and thank you to the winner of this week’s title.

On this week’s recrap…

The delightful staycay started off appearing a little sad but the Oakwood appears to have turned in to a little blokewood. Good thing she ordered oysters. You go girl! Explains why she ordered a whole bottle of red and didn’t talk much about the hotel. Oliver breathed a sigh of relief as she checked out and swiftly went upstairs to rub her fingerprints off the wall.

Dressed like a puppy pee mat, WinniebLou enjoyed a post coital ciggie outside the hotel. 70’s diet culture at its best. Speaking of culture, our lady of leisure has been taking a fair bit of time to learn about Africa. Wait til she learns it’s not just a country.

The human mondegreen dolled herself up as a lemon cello and appears to have moved on from Aaron Cheeny. Ciao to you, Pepé! Enjoying a bewdiful afternoon at the foddy wiv some warm scones, the staff at the catering box had to grab her some ice for that burn she sustained from Millsy. He does real work, 8 shows a week. He kindly offered her some tickets in exchange for her to Uber him dinner some time.

Scouting a new location for Cachia’s world book tour and dressed like my post latte turd, we ended up in Warragul. Nothing like a fan meet and greet in a tuck shop. Taking a break from African sausages, she was after a farkan hotdog mate!

Later that night Chewbacca redeemed her freebies from Millsy. (Wondering if she also took Lando Calrissian?) Having a gooorjus mummy-daughter night, she stood in front of the media wall and chromed a can of Impulse. The 90’s came flooding back. So did her memory that she bought her daughter along. Sorry MissC.

Another day, another crop top. It’s a vibe. Picking yesterday’s clothes off the floor from underneath the dog is the new fashun trend. You heard it hear first.

Another day, another crop top. FML. Mumma had a bewdy day at L’Oréal. Straight for the trough of food. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn’t fix her. Even Mark tried to fix the back of her hair for us but failed. He tried for the Xanadu but it ended up Xanadont. Nothing could be salvaged.

ALove came to dip his knife in the peanut butter. It’s been almost a year since you left us mate! Bugger off. But also, stay for a cheeky vino? We ain’t seeing T tonight.

Om my lord…. Dressed like a puppy pee mat, WinniebLou enjoyed a post coital ciggie outside the hotel. I just got a puppy so i see the colour relevance to pee mat!!! Hahaaaaa .

 

[Sponfused]

L’Oréal leading the way in caring for our planet and our people. So bewdiful!! Just gawjus. Obviously L’Oréal aren’t the only company to pretend to care about environmental and social issues but god it grinds my gears to see people like Emmyloo with a large reach, talking like they are informed about something because they attended a PR event. Their influence is completely wasted on them.

 

[SnarkyTart]

How did I miss this?!!
Keep ma name out yo mouth!!

This kills me every time!

 

[ikeaplate]

Wow just catching up after a mad dog night shift. The hair dresser at L’Oréal did her the dirty, reminding me of a mushroom either the flipped out fringe & bloated face/ no neck underneath.

 

[SnarkyTart]

@Super Cute every time you say keep my name out of you mouth I die of laughter hahahahahah it’s the new stepped in dog tit to me

it's my new favourite feature of EL threads

Om my lord…. Dressed like a puppy pee mat, WinniebLou enjoyed a post coital ciggie outside the hotel. I just got a puppy so i see the colour relevance to pee mat!!! Hahaaaaa .

New puppy! Lucky you what breed? Feel free to share pics!

 

[emmygluewho]

dead but you’re assuming she can get up to begin with… I’ll join you and move on out for the morning

I mean imagine that walrus trying to mount anything then top it with her eye bleeping, Tribe dance moves?! Such a sexual beast.

Absolute vomit.

 

[posty post]

I mean imagine that walrus trying to mount anything then top it with her eye bleeping, Tribe dance moves?! Such a sexual beast.

Absolute vomit.

I imagine her trying to get with guys exactly like Sharon on Kath and KimI feel sick that this even pops into my head.

 

[Hereforthecheezels]

I don’t understand the what’s for dinner stories - didn’t she cook burritos/tacos for the him and the kids? Or was that another day?

That was for the night she went to the AFLW movie thingo at Marvel

 

[PalmSizedSteak]

Thanks for the new thread and thank you to the winner of this week’s title.

On this week’s recrap…

The delightful staycay started off appearing a little sad but the Oakwood appears to have turned in to a little blokewood. Good thing she ordered oysters. You go girl! Explains why she ordered a whole bottle of red and didn’t talk much about the hotel. Oliver breathed a sigh of relief as she checked out and swiftly went upstairs to rub her fingerprints off the wall.

Dressed like a puppy pee mat, WinniebLou enjoyed a post coital ciggie outside the hotel. 70’s diet culture at its best. Speaking of culture, our lady of leisure has been taking a fair bit of time to learn about Africa. Wait til she learns it’s not just a country.

The human mondegreen dolled herself up as a lemon cello and appears to have moved on from Aaron Cheeny. Ciao to you, Pepé! Enjoying a bewdiful afternoon at the foddy wiv some warm scones, the staff at the catering box had to grab her some ice for that burn she sustained from Millsy. He does real work, 8 shows a week. He kindly offered her some tickets in exchange for her to Uber him dinner some time.

Scouting a new location for Cachia’s world book tour and dressed like my post latte turd, we ended up in Warragul. Nothing like a fan meet and greet in a tuck shop. Taking a break from African sausages, she was after a farkan hotdog mate!

Later that night Chewbacca redeemed her freebies from Millsy. (Wondering if she also took Lando Calrissian?) Having a gooorjus mummy-daughter night, she stood in front of the media wall and chromed a can of Impulse. The 90’s came flooding back. So did her memory that she bought her daughter along. Sorry MissC.

Another day, another crop top. It’s a vibe. Picking yesterday’s clothes off the floor from underneath the dog is the new fashun trend. You heard it hear first.

Another day, another crop top. FML. Mumma had a bewdy day at L’Oréal. Straight for the trough of food. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn’t fix her. Even Mark tried to fix the back of her hair for us but failed. He tried for the Xanadu but it ended up Xanadont. Nothing could be salvaged.

ALove came to dip his knife in the peanut butter. It’s been almost a year since you left us mate! Bugger off. But also, stay for a cheeky vino? We ain’t seeing T tonight.

Can't stop laughing - Aaron Cheeny! Too many zingers to highlight. Well done, @Sure...Media. So clever!

 

[Beige Mama]

I thought the exact same thing Betty. Patti is a class act.

Not to mention Patti actually has a career in the arts/media and put up with a lot with Bert (illness, gambling etc) ! In other news I would choose the name can of impulse

 

[itsspelleddivinenotdevine]

Just found this screenshot I took of this caption showing ELs amazing ability to word her stories promoting these businesses (took me three goes to get the screenshot now that the stories go for three years so I may as well post it even though it’s late.)

 

[DoomScroller]

The lashings of butter is doing wonders for her weight loss...

 

[emmygluewho]

Just found this screenshot I took of this caption showing ELs amazing ability to word her stories promoting these businesses (took me three goes to get the screenshot now that the stories go for three years so I may as well post it even though it’s late.)

View attachment 1507676

Much professional.

 

[Hereforthecheezels]

OMG! This poor lady says she watches old mates page while she has chemo and ELL doesn’t even wish her well!!! Just says Thankyou!!