EmmyLou Loves #108 The dildo of consequence rarely arrives lubed

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Don’t listen to all these haters Emmylou! You’re fabulous 🥰 I don’t think there is a single one of these Fezzas who can’t say they’ve made the same mistake at some point. I ALWAYS put my underwear on backwards when I get dressed in the dark too 😔.

We should have all been here to support her but instead we’ve let her down. Shame on you @StickyTapeTits ! Where were you when we needed you the most?
Maaaaaate, I was schleppin’ out to Tulla last night to try and help Sophia Chia’s tits, but I stopped for a kebab and didn’t make it in time. Looks like Chia just used a coupla bulldog clips to attach her flappy baps the lapels of her I’m-a-lesbian statement suit. And Emmy can just roll hers up like a yoga mat because… I’m on holidays! Gonna stick around Tulla and check out some more concrete and bitumen tourist attractions. I’m so jealous I don’t live here.

As Leila would say, I am “Out of Office”, even though I don’t actually have one and don’t actually work. ✌🏽
 
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duck she thinks she’s some sort of celebrity rocking up and that fuggly polyester shirt and shoes.

She definitely lives in an altered reality in her mind.
 
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Those are the most annoying looking cut of undies I think I’ve ever seen btw. They’re gonna ride up and end up in your clacker no matter how good your bum is, so just wear a g-string if that’s your want.

Wearing the clacky mules and an art smock to then get changed in public - including taking her shorts off (obscured by the art smock) AFTER forcing her foot into her runners without untying the laces says everything about her complete mess of a brain and inability to take logical steps to complete any task.
 
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bleeping witch how dare you go out in a blazer and a bra to both the nail salon and school pick up. I physically want to reach through the screen and beat the tit out of her. Knock some sense in!!!
 
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The poor nail tech having those saggy boobs in her face! Id love to be part of the school mums chat group today!
 
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*rudely interrupts conversation between parents at the school gate* oh muh God I'm so farken embarassed *giggle, tugs at blazer* I didn't have time ta get changed after muh walk at Albert Park *giggle* for Movember for charity *big bug eyes* they farken dared me ta do it in muh undies *bending forward, maniacal giggle* and it's fuh charity ya know *serious face* and I *gulp* my communidy raised 4000 I think yeah just over 4000 dollars *nodding head vigorously, giggle* so amazing just really speshul *weird hmm sound and giggle as she wanders off and the parents roll their eyes and stifle laughter*
 
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She’s bleeping off her head. I gasped when she said she was wearing that to school drop off. What a vile excuse for a mother.
 
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*rudely interrupts conversation between parents at the school gate* oh muh God I'm so farken embarassed *giggle, tugs at blazer* I didn't have time ta get changed after muh walk at Albert Park *giggle* for Movember for charity *big bug eyes* they farken dared me ta do it in muh undies *bending forward, maniacal giggle* and it's fuh charity ya know *serious face* and I *gulp* my communidy raised 4000 I think yeah just over 4000 dollars *nodding head vigorously, giggle* so amazing just really speshul *weird hmm sound and giggle as she wanders off and the parents roll their eyes and stifle laughter*
🚨*fanny grab
 
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The fact she still has the same bra on, is enough for me to know she didn't have a shower after that walk..
 
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I’m going to hell for this but I’d swap my body for hers.

She can keep her audacity and her lack of self-awareness, though.
 
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Not sure if anyone’s said it, but there’s no fkn chance she did that entire walk. Even if she posts a pic of the gps lap around the lake, it’ll be from someone else who did it earlier and sent her a screenshot. She’s such a fraud.

And she went home to smash half a two day old chook. Gross
 
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Emmy, oh FFS, that outfit isn't an outfit, you forgot your top you daft bleep. Plus the top doesn't go with the pants. And you clearly haven't showered since your walk. Or done your hair. Go duck yourself, and I feel sorry for your kids I bleeping pray you aren't getting out of the car. HATE, from KM.
 
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