Driving - Anxiety

[Upintheair83]

Well I've chickened out of driving to Pontefract I'm getting the train instead
My friend drove me on the motorway the other week and she just went really slow when she wasn't sure where she was going. She just didn't care if she pissed anyone off wish I could be like that!
I realised I'd be driving back in the dark and it made me nervous

I hear you!! On every single thing! I hate driving in the dark..... did you know I hate driving???!!

 

[37BBL]

I relate soooo much!! I literally panic if I have a new journey and will Google maps my route for weeks. I've had to do a fair few new journeys since my son has been playing football and it's always been fine and I manage it, but the fear never goes away. It definitely hasn't made it easier the more I've done it, which is so annoying.
I also hate driving in the dark. The worst is where there are no street lights and you have to use your main beam, I literally hate that. I get really panicky that people are flashing me or main beaming me, even though they aren't.
Parking, I am actually fine with. I can park between bays and don't tend to panic on that front.

 

[Loppylou89]

I relate soooo much!! I literally panic if I have a new journey and will Google maps my route for weeks. I've had to do a fair few new journeys since my son has been playing football and it's always been fine and I manage it, but the fear never goes away. It definitely hasn't made it easier the more I've done it, which is so annoying.
I also hate driving in the dark. The worst is where there are no street lights and you have to use your main beam, I literally hate that. I get really panicky that people are flashing me or main beaming me, even though they aren't.
Parking, I am actually fine with. I can park between bays and don't tend to panic on that front.

I'm with you on the driving in the dark. Majority of my route to work is dark country lanes. I really struggle to see when cars are coming towards me. I look to the left side slightly but then think I'm also steering that way so panic a bit . It's even worse when the roads are wet.

Talking of having bumps, I managed to crash into an ambulance once! Ironically it was partly caused by another ambulance!
Disclaimer: no one was in the ambulance other than the driver thankfully!

 

[Codiaeum]

I dislike driving the in dark, but not as much as driving in rain and specifically, parking in the dark and rain. Everything reflects, but you can't see anything properly at all, I'm sure that I will hit something.
Plus as always, other drivers. I would be totally fine if the road was mine....

 

[TheStrawberryThief]

I had an incident before Christmas, some bloke tailgated my car all the way to a roundabout and then started honking when I didn't immediately set off driving in half a second as I was still checking it was safe to go. I just froze and hit the break. Sat there for about 30 seconds as I couldn't work out when to go as I couldn't concentrate and panicking.

When I set off he followed me along the road honking for a bit, before turning into a side street.

I hate when people do this. It is not your job to police other peoples driving, you are not the Police or the DVLA. It only makes the person your are honking scared and they will drive worse.

The rest of the journey I was shaking and kept making mistakes. Since then I have lost confidence in myself, I am having to force myself to get into the car as I know that if I start making excuses to not drive I will stop driving.

 

[Upintheair83]

I had an incident before Christmas, some bloke tailgated my car all the way to a roundabout and then started honking when I didn't immediately set off driving in half a second as I was still checking it was safe to go. I just froze and hit the break. Sat there for about 30 seconds as I couldn't work out when to go as I couldn't concentrate and panicking.

When I set off he followed me along the road honking for a bit, before turning into a side street.

I hate when people do this. It is not your job to police other peoples driving, you are not the Police or the DVLA. It only makes the person your are honking scared and they will drive worse.

The rest of the journey I was shaking and kept making mistakes. Since then I have lost confidence in myself, I am having to force myself to get into the car as I know that if I start making excuses to not drive I will stop driving.

I really feel for you, its awful and I know how an experience can put you off. Drivers seem so impatient just lately and it's getting worse. I don't understand the hurry. I was reading that alot of people from other countries are on the road now and drive to their standards. I honestly think anyone comimg to live here should be made to do a UK driving test. But that's just my opinion.
My other half is like the driver you just described and I tell him off for it all the time, I really don't understand that mentality and I'm just sorry you went through it.
But don't let some idiot put you off, he was in the wrong and not you, but I understand how you feel because I would feel the same xxx

 

[Ensay]

I had an incident before Christmas, some bloke tailgated my car all the way to a roundabout and then started honking when I didn't immediately set off driving in half a second as I was still checking it was safe to go. I just froze and hit the break. Sat there for about 30 seconds as I couldn't work out when to go as I couldn't concentrate and panicking.

When I set off he followed me along the road honking for a bit, before turning into a side street.

I hate when people do this. It is not your job to police other peoples driving, you are not the Police or the DVLA. It only makes the person your are honking scared and they will drive worse.

The rest of the journey I was shaking and kept making mistakes. Since then I have lost confidence in myself, I am having to force myself to get into the car as I know that if I start making excuses to not drive I will stop driving.

Sorry to hear that. It's annoying when people do that. I find most people break the speed limit, too. I always stick to it, yet I constantly have cars catch up to me (which proves they're breaking the speed limit by some margin) and then tailgate, as though 60mph is too slow.

I know it's easier said than done, but I just ignore them. I drive at the speed limit and I'm not breaking the law and risking a fine/points for some impatient hole behind.

One time I was a passenger and my brother had someone tailgating him. He waited till we got to a hill where he slowed up a bit and dropped into a low gear, to build his revs up a bit, then he accelerated up the hill. The tailgater was obviously in 5th and didn't then have the power to get up the hill very quickly so we left him behind. I'm not recommending doing that, but it was funny at the time.

 

[Codiaeum]

I had an incident before Christmas, some bloke tailgated my car all the way to a roundabout and then started honking when I didn't immediately set off driving in half a second as I was still checking it was safe to go. I just froze and hit the break. Sat there for about 30 seconds as I couldn't work out when to go as I couldn't concentrate and panicking.

When I set off he followed me along the road honking for a bit, before turning into a side street.

I hate when people do this. It is not your job to police other peoples driving, you are not the Police or the DVLA. It only makes the person your are honking scared and they will drive worse.

The rest of the journey I was shaking and kept making mistakes. Since then I have lost confidence in myself, I am having to force myself to get into the car as I know that if I start making excuses to not drive I will stop driving.

I'm really sorry you had such a crappy experience with that driver. You weren't in the wrong at all, he was, but it does a number on your confidence.
Maybe it'll cheer you up that my sister - she can be a bit petty - basically did what you did, but on purpose, just to give the tailgater a nice greeting: she braked and waited for a good minute before driving on and then letting him pass, at high speed. Little did he know he was driving straight into a speed trap Bet he wished for more patience after.

 

[TheStrawberryThief]

I'm really sorry you had such a crappy experience with that driver. You weren't in the wrong at all, he was, but it does a number on your confidence.
Maybe it'll cheer you up that my sister - she can be a bit petty - basically did what you did, but on purpose, just to give the tailgater a nice greeting: she braked and waited for a good minute before driving on and then letting him pass, at high speed. Little did he know he was driving straight into a speed trap Bet he wished for more patience after.

That sounds like a great way to deal with dickheads.

I am trying to not think about it all.

It does worry me that some people clearly drive everywhere in a state of frothing anger and have a hair trigger . Are they going to run over an old lady next for not crossing fast enough

 

[Millennial Pink]

I agree, people are so impatient. I was tailgated by some fool in an SUV, on bendy country roads, in the dark the other day. These people must have a death wish.

 

[Magnolia4]

I would be the world’s best driver if I could do it some place where no other cars exist

 

[Thank(space)you]

Drove up to the quantocks recently which always scares me as once broke down on a steep hill. Was so proud of myself for doing it. Had a few impatient people up my ass on the way back because I was doing 40 in a 60, but it was dark, an Amber weather warning, raining and I don't know the roads so wasn't prepared to do 60.

 

[37BBL]

Drove up to the quantocks recently which always scares me as once broke down on a steep hill. Was so proud of myself for doing it. Had a few impatient people up my ass on the way back because I was doing 40 in a 60, but it was dark, an Amber weather warning, raining and I don't know the roads so wasn't prepared to do 60.

This is me all the time. I always lower my speed on those occasions and feel like people tailgate me all the time. I mean if it's main beam darkness and bad weather, I'm not going 60mph pal.

 

[Codiaeum]

I had a good, confidence-boosting drive today!

I basically always just drive the same thing as I mainly borrow a car to get to and from a specific place, but today the road was blocked with a vehicle and no way to pass it, so I had to not only reverse back into the traffic but also had to figure out on the spot how to get there without knowing the way and looking it up before. I smashed it Just drove on and even though it was full of one-way-streets I didn't get lost (or drive against the direction) and arrived in time. Stupidly proud of it, but I don't have a very good sense of direction and typically look up the way before going anywhere.
On my way back a few cyclists I had to pass in a very narrow street and I decided to just not pass them until I felt safe to do so and just drove very slowly.

 

[Former_Antelopee]

I have to do a 3.5 hour drive next week with my friend in the car. I did it myself a few weeks ago which was fine but I think it’ll be worse with someone in the car. Plus it took me a strange way I think. I was on the motorway for about 15minutes at the start then it was all A roads/country roads. I expected to be on the motorway the majority of the time. So I wonder if it’ll take me a different way this time. A lot of the stress for me is parking so luckily I won’t have to park in a busy place so that takes a lot of the stress away

 

[Lalla]

Tailgating gets right on my nerves. Last weekend I needed to nip to Sainsburys, the satnav was telling me my usual route was congested due to road works so it took me via a nearby dual carriageway which is a 50mph speed limit.

I was driving my son's car which struggles to do much above 50, and was probably doing about 45mph, pootling along in the inside lane (as it was only a couple of miles to where I needed to come off). The road is 3 lanes wide. A small lorry bombs up behind me and then tailgated me the whole way to my exit. Even when I increased my speed up to 50 he was still right on my bumper. There wasn't much traffic so he could easily have overtaken me but didn't. Dick.

 

[Catfan2]

As I’ve got older I hate driving more and more. I’m fine with local routes and driving to work, but anywhere I haven’t driven before and especially in the dark sets me panicking. A lot of the time it’s the impatience of other drivers. I also can’t parallel park, never have been able to.

 

[Lalla]

I can't parallel park either - I finally mastered it in 2019 when I used to drive to work every day (and parallel park at least some of those days). Then lockdown happened and we didn't go to the office for 2 years, I've now lost the knack completely.

 

[Kim Mild]

I went somewhere I haven't driven to for years today and I can't believe how nervous I felt on the way there. I much prefer the journey back.
But now I know , so I could do that route again .

 

[TiredOfFakes]

I hope you don't mind me dropping on here to ask this but I'm nearly thirty and decided to try driving I've passed my theory and was looking forward to beginning my actual driving lessons.

Yesterday I had my first one and the instructor was so chatty but I felt really uncomfortable he even called me princess which just made me feel grossed out being a woman and him a near sixty year old man he also discussed accidents learners had caused and talked about how many learners he's had pass and his rate is really high and when he got me to try driving around the corners of roads he'd moan about me drifting or turning too early or late and be huffy about it but I'm a complete beginner I came home and my confidence to try again has been dented I felt so uncomfortable has anyone else had anything like this happen?!?