Does anyone hate their job?

[Forallthoseasking]

I don't HATE my job exactly. I actually generally like what I do. My issue is that I've been doing the same thing for 3 years at this place and feel bored by it all. I had been doing the same thing for 5 years before that and came here for progression. It's sort of happened (got a bigger area to look after and more mentoring) but I'm not doing the strategy stuff I wanted to do more of. I was promised that by my manager this year, we worked on an action plan, and then it was just forgotten about after an org change in the business. I'm seeing people in other locations that do the same stuff as me get promoted to the job above and people who do less than me get promoted to my level.
When I ask my manager what else I can do as I'm at a loss, they tell me I need to learn how to do more reporting (doing that already and they know it) or that I'm doing well and just need to get the next tricky project out of the way first.

I'm bleeping tired after 2 years of relentless work and not really any reward but the issue is, it's a tech company that I have been with from quite early days and have a good shares package. If I stick it out 2 more years then I don't need to worry about maternity leave in a few years as it would be enough to clear my mortgage and more. It feels lime golden handcuffs to be miserable and overworked but waiting for this potentially big pay off

 

[TheGlossy]

I learned something today and it made me realize people have no humanity whatsoever in this company. I was chatting away with a colleague talking about how I was treated after I came back from my compassionate leave. He said he had a catch-up with the manager on the same day I returned from my leave during which he discussed a few things and said he didn't want to ask me any questions because he wanted to give me some space due to what I was going through. The manager then told him: "I don't see why her current situation would prevent her from answering her questions, I'm sure she's OK and you can ask her questions if you want". This is the same manager who when she learned that my parent passed sent me an email the following day saying: "I hope you're not looking at your work emails".

I knew they were bad but even behind my back, they're worse. Who is "OK" after a parent dies? Smh. I've no issues answering questions, but saying "I'm sure she's OK" is heartless.

 

[EasterEggs]

I had a really awful week at work last week and have been wallowing all weekend, any tips for getting back to it tomorrow? I just want to call in sick tbh

 

[RJF]

I had a really awful week at work last week and have been wallowing all weekend, any tips for getting back to it tomorrow? I just want to call in sick tbh

It always feels worse than it truly is on a Sunday.

Go in tomorrow morning. If it’s that bad you can always…

a) say you suddenly feel unwell and leave during the day

or

b) call in sick on Tuesday

 

[Codiaeum]

It always feels worse than it truly is on a Sunday.

Go in tomorrow morning. If it’s that bad you can always…

a) say you suddenly feel unwell and leave during the day

or

b) call in sick on Tuesday

Plus one to all of this. A crappy week, even a regular week, seems to crash back at you hardest on Sunday, making you dread going back and feeling like there was hardly any weekend to speak of. All valid. But go back tomorrow, it's a new week and things might have calmed down. And if all else fails, do call in sick on Tuesday to get a break.
Take note how often this happens to you. I'm leaving my job in a few weeks for something new and the Sunday dread got worse steadily for over a year for me. Not so much that I wanted to call in sick but a general feeling of dread that it would be another week like the last and how much longer I'd be lasting. If it happens frequently, maybe reconsider whether this job is still right for you. Can't tell you how much better I feel since I handed in my notice.

 

[TheGlossy]

My employer and more specifically some people in management are really looking for things to criticize.

I started in the team during COVID and never felt comfortable putting my camera on. I'm fine in normal life obviously, but I feel highly uncomfortable on webcam. I therefore never really put my camera on (more particularly as meetings are purely internal and most times don't require my intervention as there are 10+ attendees).

Today, it was brought to me that one stakeholder complained about me not putting my camera on because it conveys the idea I don't care about my job. It's honestly an unacceptable complaint. I spend countless hours working overtime for free and even working weekends. I deliver, bend over and backwards to meet unreasonable deadlines and expectations and I'm told not putting my camera on gives off a negative connotation?

Besides, if I'm in the office 5 times a week vs the rest of the time who barely shows up, it certainly says a lot about my commitment. This camera thing should be a non-issue for them. Besides, it's not written anywhere on my contract that I need to put my camera on during meetings where I'm not actively participating (which is 95% of these meetings). It is a courtesy gesture, but not a fireable offense. This complaint is unreasonable. Of all the work I've put in for free and commitment I've showed, they thank me by complaining about my camera?

I told my manager I won't be coerced into this. I'm not comfortable with the camera and refuse to be made uncomfortable in the workplace. I'm in the office, present, doing the work, delivering, it is all that matters.

 

[Norfolking Good]

To be fair I do the majority of my meetings via Teams now and it is annoying when people don’t have their camera on. You feel like you’re speaking into a black hole and can’t gauge reactions. We actually get pulled up on it so it’s non negotiable even though I’m usually minuting it so not participating in the meeting.

 

[TheGlossy]

To be fair I do the majority of my meetings via Teams now and it is annoying when people don’t have their camera on. You feel like you’re speaking into a black hole and can’t gauge reactions. We actually get pulled up on it so it’s non negotiable even though I’m usually minuting it so not participating in the meeting.

It depends on the meeting.

What is the purpose of me having my camera on in a meeting with 20+ people on when I'm supposed to be a silent attendee? This is the type of meeting I'm mostly attending. I don't see the point personally. 95% of these meetings do not concern me at all.

In the good old days, pre-Zoom and teams, people had calls over the phone or conferences which didn't entail cameras. Times have changed, but people seem to forget this was not the norm before COVID. It's not affecting my performance in any way shape or form. COVID has caused severe intrusion's in people's privacy quite frankly.

 

[JustmeKC]

It depends on the meeting.

What is the purpose of me having my camera on in a meeting with 20+ people on when I'm supposed to be a silent attendee? This is the type of meeting I'm mostly attending. I don't see the point personally. 95% of these meetings do not concern me at all.

In the good old days, pre-Zoom and teams, people had calls over the phone or conferences which didn't entail cameras. Times have changed, but people seem to forget this was not the norm before COVID. It's not affecting my performance in any way shape or form. COVID has caused severe intrusion's in people's privacy quite frankly.

I was at college with someone who put a photo of themselves as their virtual background and because there were so many people there it took ages for people to cop on that she had her camera off, maybe try that once in a while

tbh I do find it really annoying when people don’t have their cameras on but I can see your point if you are not actively participating in the meetings, equally though management are obviously seeking to promote the idea of people being present (let’s not get started on that one because it’s a real bugbear of mine!)

 

[GiftedNotFree]

I learned something today and it made me realize people have no humanity whatsoever in this company. I was chatting away with a colleague talking about how I was treated after I came back from my compassionate leave. He said he had a catch-up with the manager on the same day I returned from my leave during which he discussed a few things and said he didn't want to ask me any questions because he wanted to give me some space due to what I was going through. The manager then told him: "I don't see why her current situation would prevent her from answering her questions, I'm sure she's OK and you can ask her questions if you want". This is the same manager who when she learned that my parent passed sent me an email the following day saying: "I hope you're not looking at your work emails".

I knew they were bad but even behind my back, they're worse. Who is "OK" after a parent dies? Smh. I've no issues answering questions, but saying "I'm sure she's OK" is heartless.

I’m really sorry about this it’s so heartless and cold. It’s crushing when someone basically invalidates how you are or may be feeling. Urgh.

Something similar happened to me at work a few years ago - my cousin whom I was really close with (more like a sibling relationship) died out of the blue in their early 20s. I was absolutely devastated. I took some additional time off work because I wasn’t coping well. When I did come back (around 3.5 weeks after their passing), my manager said to me “oh, a lot of my cousins have died!” as if it was nothing. Not that it should matter, but they were 60+ years old and these relations had lived a lot longer than mine. It hurt so much.

 

[TheGlossy]

I’m really sorry about this it’s so heartless and cold. It’s crushing when someone basically invalidates how you are or may be feeling. Urgh.

Something similar happened to me at work a few years ago - my cousin whom I was really close with (more like a sibling relationship) died out of the blue in their early 20s. I was absolutely devastated. I took some additional time off work because I wasn’t coping well. When I did come back (around 3.5 weeks after their passing), my manager said to me “oh, a lot of my cousins have died!” as if it was nothing. Not that it should matter, but they were 60+ years old and these relations had lived a lot longer than mine. It hurt so much.

I'm really sorry for your loss

What a horrifying thing to say to someone who is grieving the loss of a cousin. Your cousin was in their early 20s, so it is obviously different from a cousin dying of old age in their 70s. I can only imagine the pain of losing someone at such a young age at out of the blue. It must have been absolutely devastating. Some people are so insensitive. We know death is part of the cycle of "life", but it doesn't mean it makes the pain any easier. Unless someone has gone through something similar, I think it is difficult for some people to empathize. I don't even try to psychoanalyze these people anymore because I have my own emotions to care about. I've stopped trying to rationalize why someone would say something like this. All I know is that it is not OK and should not be tolerated under any circumstance.

I had someone at work tell me "trust you had a great weekend" the Monday following my dad's death (and they knew about it) while someone else told me "we all have problems". Some people are simply out of this world. I'm not surprised at what comes out of some people's mouth sometimes. More and more people have become desensitized unfortunately.

 

[House of Tea]

It depends on the meeting.

What is the purpose of me having my camera on in a meeting with 20+ people on when I'm supposed to be a silent attendee? This is the type of meeting I'm mostly attending. I don't see the point personally. 95% of these meetings do not concern me at all.

In the good old days, pre-Zoom and teams, people had calls over the phone or conferences which didn't entail cameras. Times have changed, but people seem to forget this was not the norm before COVID. It's not affecting my performance in any way shape or form. COVID has caused severe intrusion's in people's privacy f quite frankly.

I don’t like having my camera on, but I do it when necessary. I would just put it on. It isn’t worth the stress of fighting it. So much energy wasted and stress fighting it. I see it as a minor irritation, and at least I can work at home. I think you are getting upset about small things because you feel they have treated you badly with regard to the death of a loved one. I think you need to concentrate on getting out of there. Otherwise what will happen is you will fight them over trivial things because you want to get back of them for their bad treatment of you. (I have been there, all that happens is you waste a lot of time and you get nowhere, and ultimately you hate the person you have become.)

 

[no-no]

My employer and more specifically some people in management are really looking for things to criticize.

I started in the team during COVID and never felt comfortable putting my camera on. I'm fine in normal life obviously, but I feel highly uncomfortable on webcam. I therefore never really put my camera on (more particularly as meetings are purely internal and most times don't require my intervention as there are 10+ attendees).

Today, it was brought to me that one stakeholder complained about me not putting my camera on because it conveys the idea I don't care about my job. It's honestly an unacceptable complaint. I spend countless hours working overtime for free and even working weekends. I deliver, bend over and backwards to meet unreasonable deadlines and expectations and I'm told not putting my camera on gives off a negative connotation?

Besides, if I'm in the office 5 times a week vs the rest of the time who barely shows up, it certainly says a lot about my commitment. This camera thing should be a non-issue for them. Besides, it's not written anywhere on my contract that I need to put my camera on during meetings where I'm not actively participating (which is 95% of these meetings). It is a courtesy gesture, but not a fireable offense. This complaint is unreasonable. Of all the work I've put in for free and commitment I've showed, they thank me by complaining about my camera?

I told my manager I won't be coerced into this. I'm not comfortable with the camera and refuse to be made uncomfortable in the workplace. I'm in the office, present, doing the work, delivering, it is all that matters.

I agree, I hate webcam. If you call me and mine’s off and you don’t like it just turn yours off However, it has become something a lot of people take offence to so I reluctantly put on for scheduled meetings to save the hassle. We’ve even had training with external companies saying how it’s very rude and so people (usually management) have a real bee in their bonnet. I’ve been chastised by directors whilst in meetings I’m not even presenting in but if I feel crap (BDD) I have had to refuse to put it on.

 

[Rxt156]

I think the webcam thing is to make sure you’re there. I would never put mine on either, it should be personal choice. Sucks that there is no trust in employment and workplaces these days and you have to prove everything

eg prove that you’re at your desk or prove that something you’ve done something (which always creates more work )

 

[thenoodle]

Cover your webcam with a thin price of paper, they’ll be able to see your shadow and if they question it say it must be broken

 

[ElectricDreams]

I don't hate my job, in fact, for the first time in years I've got a job that I'm quite happy in. Unfortunately I'm finding it quite a struggle to be there at the moment.

When I took the job (school setting) it was a temporary contract until August but pretty much assured that due to the success of the business and access to funding it would be extended beyond August for at least a year.

Six weeks in, I was handed my notice and told that my contract was ending in August as the role as it was would be changing (hours increasing) but they would like me to apply for the new role. I was told my manager would let me know when the advert went live. I asked my manager and she said "oh there's an email" but when I checked I couldn't find it. I assumed it would be live the following week.

A few days later, they held interviews for internal posts within the school. At this point I realised it was for the job I was doing. When I asked again I was told that the advert had gone out 2 weeks before I got my notice and the closing date 2 days before! The post was filled and I hadn't even had the chance to apply. The other applicants had all been made redundant by the school and the posts were only open to them.

My manager spoke to the head and assured me she was "on it" and would get back to me. I'm still waiting a month later. My manager hasn't acknowledged it any further and while we still get on and work well together, I sense she feels very awkward around me. I'm gutted, I'm trying to carry on as normal but it's hard knowing I have to leave through no choice of my own. I'm also shitting myself at the thought of starting over again so soon.

 

[House of Tea]

I don't hate my job, in fact, for the first time in years I've got a job that I'm quite happy in. Unfortunately I'm finding it quite a struggle to be there at the moment.

When I took the job (school setting) it was a temporary contract until August but pretty much assured that due to the success of the business and access to funding it would be extended beyond August for at least a year.

Six weeks in, I was handed my notice and told that my contract was ending in August as the role as it was would be changing (hours increasing) but they would like me to apply for the new role. I was told my manager would let me know when the advert went live. I asked my manager and she said "oh there's an email" but when I checked I couldn't find it. I assumed it would be live the following week.

A few days later, they held interviews for internal posts within the school. At this point I realised it was for the job I was doing. When I asked again I was told that the advert had gone out 2 weeks before I got my notice and the closing date 2 days before! The post was filled and I hadn't even had the chance to apply. The other applicants had all been made redundant by the school and the posts were only open to them.

My manager spoke to the head and assured me she was "on it" and would get back to me. I'm still waiting a month later. My manager hasn't acknowledged it any further and while we still get on and work well together, I sense she feels very awkward around me. I'm gutted, I'm trying to carry on as normal but it's hard knowing I have to leave through no choice of my own. I'm also shitting myself at the thought of starting over again so soon.

That’s crappy. It feels a bit deliberate. If they wanted you to apply they would have made sure you saw the advert etc and have time to apply.

You are leaving anyway, you have nothing to lose, I would raise again politely with manager and let her know how disappointed you are that you were not alerted to the ad, and that you are leaving a job you like. Never mind awkwardness, assert yourself a bit. You never know they might have another vacancy soon.

Is it possible that a bit of nepotism is going on, someone was earmarked for the job who was friends with or related to someone else there?

 

[TheGlossy]

I don’t like having my camera on, but I do it when necessary. I would just put it on. It isn’t worth the stress of fighting it. So much energy wasted and stress fighting it. I see it as a minor irritation, and at least I can work at home. I think you are getting upset about small things because you feel they have treated you badly with regard to the death of a loved one. I think you need to concentrate on getting out of there. Otherwise what will happen is you will fight them over trivial things because you want to get back of them for their bad treatment of you. (I have been there, all that happens is you waste a lot of time and you get nowhere, and ultimately you hate the person you have become.)

Nothing to do with the death of my dad on this point. They have been making remarks about this here and there since before he passed. I don't have time to retaliate in such a petty manner over how I was treated. I've never enjoyed putting my camera on is all.

 

[ElectricDreams]

That’s crappy. It feels a bit deliberate. If they wanted you to apply they would have made sure you saw the advert etc and have time to apply.

You are leaving anyway, you have nothing to lose, I would raise again politely with manager and let her know how disappointed you are that you were not alerted to the ad, and that you are leaving a job you like. Never mind awkwardness, assert yourself a bit. You never know they might have another vacancy soon.

Is it possible that a bit of nepotism is going on, someone was earmarked for the job who was friends with or related to someone else there?

Oh it definitely felt deliberate. There were 3 posts available and lots of people had been made redundant across the school trust. There are 2 schools in our area under this trust who had staff eligible to apply. I feel like they would rather the job went to someone who'd worked there for years rather than someone who'd been there 5 mins. The area I work in is quite niche and not for everyone, I know of at least one person who applied for the job but didn't really want it!

I think I will say something before I leave, I don't want to burn bridges but at the moment it's a bit raw and I don't trust myself to be polite about it!

 

[toetoetoe88]

Oh it definitely felt deliberate. There were 3 posts available and lots of people had been made redundant across the school trust. There are 2 schools in our area under this trust who had staff eligible to apply. I feel like they would rather the job went to someone who'd worked there for years rather than someone who'd been there 5 mins. The area I work in is quite niche and not for everyone, I know of at least one person who applied for the job but didn't really want it!

I think I will say something before I leave, I don't want to burn bridges but at the moment it's a bit raw and I don't trust myself to be polite about it!

I'm finding a lot of schools and academies are doing this - back in the temping days it happened a lot to me and other people. I'd always make a point of raising something before I left and I just made sure to be professionally polite (yet pissed off hah). Completely understandable that it's quite raw at the moment - have you had anything else through the grapevine come August workwise?