I am so tired of bitchy cliques in work. I only go in once a week and can basically sit where I like. They scatter themselves around but go into gossipy huddles. Everytime I look up they seem to be looking at me and whispering. I realise I sound paranoid, but it is a thing. There isn’t usually anyone around me, so it’s not like they are looking at anyone else. These are middle aged women, as am I. I just want to tell them to grow the duck up. We are all too long in the tooth for this playground stuff. I don’t interact with them, I have no need to and I definitely don’t want to now, I have done nothing to them, I have no idea why they are so interested in me. It really does seem that some people carry their childish ways with them when they leave school and just take the mentality of cliques and bitchiness with them into adulthood.
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I’m guessing you’re a nurse (pin). I’m a fellow HCP who left the clinical world/public services. A job should never make you feel awful/worried. Good luck in your search & whatever comes next for you
Someone posted about this in the petty thread.My boss sent an email out to everyone in the team this afternoon asking us to account for every minute of our morning today. He has a suspicion we're not working as efficiently as he would like and wants to know what we've been doing.
Talk about a micromanager!!
I can't get on with my work tasks if I'm too busy drawing up an excel table accounting for every minute between 9 and 12.
Every 20 mins they would fill in the efficiency log until it was obvious it was just wasting time.
The Sunday night dread…
I’ve never pulled a sickie in my working life, but really feel like doing it tomorrow 
Me too, except I won’t let the bastards beat me.
does Anyone manage to shut off and not worry about work the rest of the weekend?
I’ve been trying to work many more hours to compensate for the time I spend daydreaming…. so I am constantly worried about work. The entire weekend I think I should just be working, So that I can catch up. Then blink and the weekend is over and I have spent it feeling guilty.
Is there an I love my job thread so I can read how the other half live? Maybe I just hate work - so all jobs are going to be disappointing…
I’ve been trying to work many more hours to compensate for the time I spend daydreaming…. so I am constantly worried about work. The entire weekend I think I should just be working, So that I can catch up. Then blink and the weekend is over and I have spent it feeling guilty.
Is there an I love my job thread so I can read how the other half live? Maybe I just hate work - so all jobs are going to be disappointing…
I have done this is in the past and completely understand. Ultimately its not at all good for you, but the usual standard advice will be to speak to your line manager about your workload, ask for help, etc, but I know I've never done that,* and it's honestly rare that I don't think about work quite a bit at the weekend... For jobs I've loved, I've not begrudged it, for work I've hated, it's made my MH poor, my hair fall out etc.
Don't suffer. Find balance or find a new job, maybe?
* I wish I could have, and this is still the most sensible advice.
I have a theory that every job has it's own bullshit. All my jobs have had maximum bullshit, being NHS. You move to a new job and it's just a matter of time before you find out what it is and how bad. If you can tolerate it for a long time, I count that as a win.
My husband has had 3 new jobs since the pandemic started - for better opportunities, I should add. He LOVES his work generally but I joke now that his bullshit tolerance is getting so low, he'll be out of the next job within 3 months. The tipping point seems to be how long does the first complaint (to me) take and by the time the complaining takes up more than half our daily walk, it's DEFINITELY time for him to leave - for my sanity if nothing else
I really struggle with daydreaming/ getting distracted especially if my tasks are repetitive and I’m not being challenged. And I used to try and compensate by working over. It never worked because I’d end up burnt out and in a cycle of procrastinate>work over> procrastinate.
Only in the last year or so have I got to grips with stopping that. I realised there’s always going to be more work- as long as my work is delivered and will be on time (even then there’s nothing wrong with pushing back and saying you want to QC it), then I take the daydream time and don’t work extra to fill it. I allow myself to be booked for up to 80% of my capacity (incase there’s something urgent comes up) and I only work over if It’s absolutely necessary and I’ve found it actually balances out quite nicely with the natural flow of work volume. For me I can have a week where things are lighter to the point I even have the odd day where I do very little, so then when the busier week comes I don’t feel burnt out by it.
I still get Sunday night anxiety about work on the Monday but a lot less now I’m not totally burned out by the time the weekend arrives.
There is one woman who makes my job hell and I know most of my other colleagues find her hard work too . She is bossy , lazy ,bitchy ,crap at her job but good at looking busy and good at making things she hears in passing sound important . Our manager just keeps saying things like he knows what she’s like and to ignore her but then give her more and more responsibility for our department to make his life easier . The thought of tiptoeing round her everyday and putting up with her moods causes me such anxiety about work . The thing is I can do my own job without much thought but she causes problems where there aren’t any and finds your weak spots when she pretends to be nice then uses it against you when she’s got an audience .
Just had to get that off my chest after a horrible day !
Just had to get that off my chest after a horrible day !
This is such great practical advice. Like you say, you never really finish all your work because there is always MORE work to come.
Appreciate this only really works for office-based jobs (mostly) but I've started to build a lot more time into my working week too. I'll usually have two to three "must do" tasks in a day and then the rest of the time will either be meetings or smaller admin type tasks. I used to get myself into such a flap and panic whenever anyone wanted me to do something, because I always thought it had to be dealt with immediately, but now I'll reply and say yup that's fine, I'll have it done by X date.
I don't think it's normal or right to be operating at 100% all day, every day. You need downtime and quieter days because there will always be busy times. It's so important to be protective of your time, just because you have a gap in your diary between 10-11am that doesn't mean it needs to be filled by someone else's demand!
So this month I was given a payrise at my current firm and was approached by another firm about a job. I had a very informal interview and they have offered the job with a 20% increase on my current salary.
I do feel bad about leaving my current place as I love the team and people, it's the clients who are unreasonable and that the firm overall has ignored the lack of staff in the office I am predominately based. There used to be two of us full time and now it's only me a couple of days a week.
I do feel bad about leaving my current place as I love the team and people, it's the clients who are unreasonable and that the firm overall has ignored the lack of staff in the office I am predominately based. There used to be two of us full time and now it's only me a couple of days a week.
Never feel bad about improving your life. Great news about the job.
I'm planning on popping into the HR office this morning to essentially do nothing more than dob on a loathsome idiot from another team who is based in my office.
She barely works, definitely doesn't actually understand her job, is late and leaves early and works on her own personal projects all the time and does nothing to hide any of this. In fact she actively flaunts it. Her manager is obv to blame, but she's not around lately.
It has virtually no effect on me or my team other than it being really demoralising because most of us work really really hard and we're there to witness it.
I've tried letting it go and I can't - any tips on rising above and letting it go or (preferably!) your stories of getting rid of someone from work??
She barely works, definitely doesn't actually understand her job, is late and leaves early and works on her own personal projects all the time and does nothing to hide any of this. In fact she actively flaunts it. Her manager is obv to blame, but she's not around lately.
It has virtually no effect on me or my team other than it being really demoralising because most of us work really really hard and we're there to witness it.
I've tried letting it go and I can't - any tips on rising above and letting it go or (preferably!) your stories of getting rid of someone from work??
@Some People! similar situation except it’s my bosses daughter. Sits on her phone all day, not proactive. Won’t even answer the phone, can’t compose emails without my help (she’s 21!) Can’t tell my boss cos he’ll fly off the handle. We don’t have a HR department… It’s a family run business. 
In my experience this will not go well for you. The fact is it has no effect on you other than being demoralising.
As crappy as it is, I don't think going to HR will do anything positive here, but it could be harmful for you in the longer run. Even though that coworker doesn't do the job and is a burden on the team, as long as you can't bring prove and have the manager back that all up, it'll essentially come of as winging (which HR will tell you to take to the manager) or, in the worst case, as a case of bullying. Letting it go honestly is the option here. Can't tell you how to go about that, I'm trying to find my own way into that
This. You will be seen as someone to watch for all the wrong reasons. It is frustrating and demoralising but it none of your business. I speak from experience.As crappy as it is, I don't think going to HR will do anything positive here, but it could be harmful for you in the longer run. Even though that coworker doesn't do the job and is a burden on the team, as long as you can't bring prove and have the manager back that all up, it'll essentially come of as winging (which HR will tell you to take to the manager) or, in the worst case, as a case of bullying. Letting it go honestly is the option here. Can't tell you how to go about that, I'm trying to find my own way into that
The best advice I was ever given was to choose your battles, if she has no impact on you then I'd say it's probably not a battle worth fighting.
I'd think about how this will make you look to HR as well. My colleague tried to get our manager sacked while he (manager) was on holiday and it massively backfired, because it was clear to everyone that my colleague was the problem and my colleague is now working his notice period. It's not your job to "get rid" of a colleague just because their behavior irritates you, that's down to their line manager. In the kindest way possible, try to find it in you to rise above it and focus on doing your own job really well.
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