What is your desired outcome?I'm planning on popping into the HR office this morning to essentially do nothing more than dob on a loathsome idiot from another team who is based in my office.
She barely works, definitely doesn't actually understand her job, is late and leaves early and works on her own personal projects all the time and does nothing to hide any of this. In fact she actively flaunts it. Her manager is obv to blame, but she's not around lately.
It has virtually no effect on me or my team other than it being really demoralising because most of us work really really hard and we're there to witness it.
I've tried letting it go and I can't - any tips on rising above and letting it go or (preferably!) your stories of getting rid of someone from work??
- Status
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
What is your desired outcome?
Their last words were…preferably your stories of getting rid of someone at work. So she wants them to be sacked, is how I read it.
At least she's only mugging off her dad, but it sucks that she makes work for anyone else. I guess she's in the role because the family know she's completely unemployable. Hate this for you.@Some People! similar situation except it’s my bosses daughter. Sits on her phone all day, not proactive. Won’t even answer the phone, can’t compose emails without my help (she’s 21!) Can’t tell my boss cos he’ll fly off the handle. We don’t have a HR department… It’s a family run business.
The meeting went fine. Turns out they've had someone from the organisation in to talk to them every day this week about her (!!). I bought up some stuff which was super concerning to them that they were as yet unaware of.
The early outcome is that she's now being closely monitored by a couple of senior managers, which I'm glad of.
Longer term outcome will depend upon the head of HR's thoughts tomorrow and the colleague's manager's thoughts when she returns from AL next week.
I'm so pleased to report that HR were receptive and understanding and glad of the Intel. They've actioned some steps already and will be offering support to her manager from next week. Thankfully I wasn't so irate, so I was able to make a good case for my own objectivity. I'm just one of a chorus of voices against her at this point, so hopefully something will change.As crappy as it is, I don't think going to HR will do anything positive here, but it could be harmful for you in the longer run. Even though that coworker doesn't do the job and is a burden on the team, as long as you can't bring prove and have the manager back that all up, it'll essentially come of as winging (which HR will tell you to take to the manager) or, in the worst case, as a case of bullying. Letting it go honestly is the option here. Can't tell you how to go about that, I'm trying to find my own way into that
I already feel more able to let all the petty stuff go now I know someone's paying attention to the stuff that matters. I wish you the very best in rising above - you're right, it's not easy
I'm really sorry that you had that experience - are you still in that role?
Thankfully whilst it's none of *my* business, it is very much the business of HR who are now paying attention.
I'd like to think that I'm one to watch for all the right reasons - I'm absolutely and very publicly killing it at work just now and I'd like to think that this speaks for itself
But who knows? I could get made redundant at some point in the future, the way the economy is looking 
You're quite right, but I promise that I've chosen this battle carefully. It's not even really a battle I'm fighting on an ongoing basis to be fair, I've said my piece now and it's out of my hands. If they choose to ignore all the people complaining about her, that's on them.
I guess I've been intentionally vague, but the issues do go a bit deeper than pure irritation on my part - I'm strict with myself about objectivity and fairness and wouldn't complain about someone just because they're annoying. There are contract-related and legal issues at stake.
She *is* insanely irritating though
I think, more than anything, I'd like for her manager to get some [more?] support, both in terms of dealing with this head and with their workload. Manager is a great person but a poor manager, either because of weakness in confronting the issues, or because they're truly unaware of what's going on (surely not?!).
I'd also appreciate this idiot not making us all look bad.
Won't lie, I'd love that and they have definitely earned that. Any other department would have been done with this shitbag ages ago.
I'm not gunning for her, I'd settle for her just keeping her head down and even pretending to work at this point.
Thanks all for your stellar advice, and I take it all in the spirit in which it was intended
I'll keep you all posted with any outcomes I'm privy to.
I'm glad I spoke to HR and I'm glad they are approachable and reasonable. A more "corporate" HR may well not have responded so well, but I think they understood that I wasn't just being a whiny and vindictive witch. I hope you all understand that here on Tattle I feel I'm in a safe space to both whine *and* be a witch
I'd definitely urge caution to anyone in a similar position - most HR depts, in my experience, aren't so receptive.
Last edited:
Well, her and her dad mugged me off yesterday… both went for an extended lunch… get a message off her dad asking me to do something while I’m on my lunch! She rocks up half an hour after she was due back from her lunch hour and tells me she was at the pub with her dad and he asked her to send that message to me off his phone.
I was livid.
Ugh, what a pair of wankers. I guess they feel like dicking people about and doing whatever is a perk of owning your own business/ working for family...? Yuck.
I'd definitely and very reasonably ignore messages that come through while you're on your break.
I don't hate my job, I've been here for almost 8 years. However I've never moved up, the management are clueless, they don't want to change or modernise, they don't want to invest in their staff or even get us the equipment we need. The facilities are awful too. I think it's time for me to move on. I'm not challenged at all by my job and to be honest I think half of what I'm supposed to do is pointless but no one wants to listen. If you care too much you're almost frowned upon.
Im terrified of leaving incase I end up somewhere I hate, I've been in that position before, but at the same time I'm only 30 and I can't see myself being happy here for the rest of my working life. I'm capable of more. I have a degree I don't even use.
I'm comfortable here, but I feel like my job is pointless. Is it worth the stress of a new job? I just don't know what to do for the best.
Im terrified of leaving incase I end up somewhere I hate, I've been in that position before, but at the same time I'm only 30 and I can't see myself being happy here for the rest of my working life. I'm capable of more. I have a degree I don't even use.
I'm comfortable here, but I feel like my job is pointless. Is it worth the stress of a new job? I just don't know what to do for the best.
i hate when management pretend like they know what they’re doing but they actually have no idea 
Yes, find a new job but one you REALLY want. If you hate it, find another! You can always say on your CV it just didn't work out, it happened to me and no-one bats an eyelid.
What's the alternative, you could stay in a pointless job for the rest of your working life but wouldn't you rather at least see what else is out there?
There’s no harm in seeing what’s out there!
To be honest, I’ve moved jobs twice in the last year and I do find the first 6 months v difficult but really that’s not very long in the grand scheme of things. 30 is still young!!
Thanks for this. I've got my eye on a job that's been advertised. I don't fit all the criteria they want but I feel like I'm pretty close and have a lot of relevant experience. I think I will do my application this weekend. It can't hurt.
I always said that I would do the job until it wasn't fun anymore. It was fun for me for a long time, but at one point, it wasn't anymore and I set out to find a new one. I'm there now and after two months can say that I love it. I'm excited for it again, which I really missed. Maybe you are at a similar point with your job, and while it's a bit frightening to put yourself out there, go through interviews and be "the new one", it can give you the spark back you may be missing right now. There's no harm in looking
I was off work all last week with COVID and was really unwell. I'm still not 100% but am returning to work today. I know I've got outstanding work I need to catch up on because of this etc etc.
Even so, I just know my boss will be moaning today about tasks that were supposed to have been done last week not being completed. He obviously knows why I've been off but I really don't think that'll factor into his head before he no doubt sends an arsey email my way.
I think situations like this cement my decision to leave as soon as I have another job offer, I shouldn't be waking up full of anxiety about what today will bring, especially because it'll be no fault of my own.
Even so, I just know my boss will be moaning today about tasks that were supposed to have been done last week not being completed. He obviously knows why I've been off but I really don't think that'll factor into his head before he no doubt sends an arsey email my way.
I think situations like this cement my decision to leave as soon as I have another job offer, I shouldn't be waking up full of anxiety about what today will bring, especially because it'll be no fault of my own.
Send an arsey email back if he does. Not full on rude, passive aggressive should do it.
It made me laugh because I got a call in the morning saying "don't worry, just get yourself sorted today and we can catch up later in the week. I understand you've been unwell" and then an hour later another call desperately asking for updates. It's obvious that my boss's boss was breathing down his neck hence the change in desperation. My boss isn't one to be cool, calm and collected either so when his boss panics, it travels down and then we all feel a bit panicky.
My manager has been signed off for about a month now and I feel loads better about work. She has a lot of problems with the people here and was deffo passing her bad vibes and stress on to me 
she’s about due to retire so I’m thinking (/hoping!) she won’t be back.
Still hate the wfh and having some of my team being 100% remote but otherwise in a good place. I’m going to see how I feel in March when I’ll have been there for a year then look at moving. Hopefully they’ll promote me to manager in the next few months which will be better for moving.
she’s about due to retire so I’m thinking (/hoping!) she won’t be back. Still hate the wfh and having some of my team being 100% remote but otherwise in a good place. I’m going to see how I feel in March when I’ll have been there for a year then look at moving. Hopefully they’ll promote me to manager in the next few months which will be better for moving.
Just got an email from my boss asking why I didn't do enough work yesterday.
That was literally it.
Sorry guys, feeling really teary about it. bleeping worked from 7am until 7pm too to try and clear my inbox, working through my lunch etc and just wake up to emails like that.
Why do I bother?
That was literally it.
Sorry guys, feeling really teary about it. bleeping worked from 7am until 7pm too to try and clear my inbox, working through my lunch etc and just wake up to emails like that.
Why do I bother?
that sucks. If you feel up to it, you could write back asking them to write down what exactly didn’t live up to their expectations. Working twelve hours and through lunch is never a good idea and most certainly not one that should go uninformed by the manager, so coming back to something like that is really just shite. I’d want to understand which part of working that long to catch up wasn’t what they were expecting. In my experience, often you won’t really get an answer back, so it essentially comes down to manager trying to get some form of control that’s neither necessary nor called for. In that case, maybe start looking to move away?
I'm going to formulate an email later to explain my side of the situation.
Definitely agree working outside of contracted hours/through lunch isn't good. I hate doing it, I really do, but it's hard when you've got managers breathing down your neck and you just need to get it done. I always come away feeling drained because of it.
I don't hate my job but feel underutilised and bored. I have 20+ years experience in a particular sector and was headhunted and hired into an organisation earlier this year in a different industry to effectively provide expertise on this particular subject. The problem is I work with people who think they know and understand my sector (despite typically only having 3-5 years experience in an aligned sector) and don't want my input as they don't always like the answers I give ie I point out the issues / risks and they would rather pretend these things don't exist. Our workload as a team has significantly dropped in the last 4 months and I spend a lot of my day trying to look busy. The only plus side is that it pays extremely well but I'm so bored.
- Status