Dating after lockdown #36 Have you dated a man? You may be entitled to compensation.

[whathastheworldcometo]

I don't think advice on this thread ever comes from a place of anything other than kindness or concern, or based on past personal experience but tone is something that can be difficult to convey in writing and I know also that some people (like me) find tough love a bit, well, tough

I'm having an awful day (I'm sure to most people it would be a minor blip but for me it feels like the end of the world) and I'm the closest I've been in 18 months to messaging my Ex because I just miss his advice at times like this. He was always so good at talking me down from metaphorical ledges. So I'm posting here instead to remind myself that ultimately no good can come of contacting him. It'll pass soon hopefully.

Could you contact anybody else instead?

I am also facing a bit of a challenge at the moment, I don't even want to handle it and so I am procrastinating.... So I understand the urge to look for comfort very well, but maybe Friends (the TV series or real life ones) and hot chocolate could help.

 

[LittleLen]

It's crazy. Here I am thinking that if you do relationship things, aren't dating other people, and generally just KNOW it's a relationship... well then it's probably a relationship. Not with these guys though!

I was once with someone for 2 years. Exclusively. Met his whole family, went to his sisters wedding, holiday's abroad, living together practically.

Then he cheated on me and had the nerve to say "well I never actually said you were my girlfriend."

TWO YEARS.

 

[HelloStereo]

I was once with someone for 2 years. Exclusively. Met his whole family, went to his sisters wedding, holiday's abroad, living together practically.

Then he cheated on me and had the nerve to say "well I never actually said you were my girlfriend."

TWO YEARS.

I swear this is why they split hairs and call it something else. It's so easy then if they cheat to say "well we were never in a relationship."
---

This sounds like some form of desert, like eton mess

Gives squirty cream a whole new meaning.

 

[Lalla]

Could you contact anybody else instead?

I am also facing a bit of a challenge at the moment, I don't even want to handle it and so I am procrastinating.... So I understand the urge to look for comfort very well, but maybe Friends (the TV series or real life ones) and hot chocolate could help.

Thank you I reached out to a couple of friends earlier but haven't heard back yet. I've bored my son with it but he's not really got enough life experience to advise. Plus no 25 year old wants to be burdened with their mums problems!

I'm feeling a bit calmer (had a cry which helped) although I did remember the thing my Ex always used to say about us being on the same team which nearly started me off again

I am ruled by procrastination (as well as perfectionism), it's a heavy burden. I hope you have support with your challenge. I think I'm going to make something nice for dinner and get my bed back in my room so at least I can have a decent sleep tonight which is something to look forward to. Stuff always seems better after a good sleep.

 

[whathastheworldcometo]

Thank you I reached out to a couple of friends earlier but haven't heard back yet. I've bored my son with it but he's not really got enough life experience to advise. Plus no 25 year old wants to be burdened with their mums problems!

I'm feeling a bit calmer (had a cry which helped) although I did remember the thing my Ex always used to say about us being on the same team which nearly started me off again

I am ruled by procrastination (as well as perfectionism), it's a heavy burden. I hope you have support with your challenge. I think I'm going to make something nice for dinner and get my bed back in my room so at least I can have a decent sleep tonight which is something to look forward to. Stuff always seems better after a good sleep.

Yes, I have some friends I can call for advice and support. But I would still like to avoid having to deal with this uncomfortable task.

You are right that sleep makes things better. Do you have some essential oils? Maybe some lavender oil could also help you wind down (I sometimes put a drop on my pillow case and feel that my sleep is deeper) or some camomile tea or dark chocolate.

 

[Lalla]

Yes, I have some friends I can call for advice and support. But I would still like to avoid having to deal with this uncomfortable task.

You are right that sleep makes things better. Do you have some essential oils? Maybe some lavender oil could also help you wind down (I sometimes put a drop on my pillow case and feel that my sleep is deeper) or some camomile tea or dark chocolate.

I don't have essential oils but I think I've got some lavender pillow spray, will use some of that as it definitely relaxes me. Might have a hot bath as well as I'm freezing today. Thanks again

 

[Funsizes]

I think a lot of the confusion comes from the US influence (I remember being confused as a teenager about all the “bases” and going steady…)

From what I gather, nowadays you go exclusive (ie not dating anyone else) then have a chat to decide if you’re a couple ie. boyfriend and girlfriend.

As much as I love healthy communication, it seems a little immature to me and it complicates things.

The first point!! I once accidentally ended with with a boyfriend because he thought dating meant that and I thought (and still think...) it means going on dates/getting to know eachother.

 

[EddyDarling]

Hello everyone

I'm 32 today

Mr tinder took me to London for lunch and a cocktail and got me two beautiful necklaces (ethical handmade and sustainable, no tacky van cleefs for me) and some beautiful red roses.
He also got my kids some sweets and cupcakes to celebrate

 

[al255]

Hello everyone

I'm 32 today

Mr tinder took me to London for lunch and a cocktail and got me two beautiful necklaces (ethical handmade and sustainable, no tacky van cleefs for me) and some beautiful red roses.
He also got my kids some sweets and cupcakes to celebrate

AWWW happy birthday! It's my 30th today as well!! I've had a lovely day celebrating and R is taking me out for an Italian and wine tonight ..hope you've had a lovely day xxxxx

 

[IGiveUp22]

Happy birthday you beautiful women

 

[EddyDarling]

Aww happy birthday @al255
And happy "us" season
I love a classic Italian place, you'll have a great evening
Glad you're enjoying time with your new fella as well

 

[harveydean]

Happy birthday @EddyDarling and @al255

I hope you’ve had the best days!

Did you wear the red dress Eddy?

 

[EddyDarling]

Happy birthday @EddyDarling and @al255

I hope you’ve had the best days!

Did you wear the red dress Eddy?

I did! Forgot to get any photos but it's very cute and I felt very feminine but still a smidge sexy
Mr tinder liked it (he likes everything though)

I want him to invite me to a social function so I can order a beautiful yellow dress I saw online this morning (it's not available yet typically)

 

[HelloStereo]

Happy birthday @EddyDarling and @al255

 

[Guyyyyyzzzzzz]

Happy birthday ladies!


Also, no response needed but why are fully grown men, older then 35 still acting like absolute children. I’d say they’re due a midlife crisis but I feel it’s wrong to justify such negative behaviour. Gremlins.

 

[Blueblue123]

Happy birthday! @EddyDarling and @al255

 

[LaBlonde]

immediately about to do this (not for f1 though obviously )

 

[Thank(space)you]

@NoddyFromToytown how was your wild swimming?

 

[NoddyFromToytown]

@NoddyFromToytown how was your wild swimming?

I actually really enjoyed it! It definitely wasn't a date but there was a little mild flirtation going on, and he's asked me to do it again sometime (and no he didn't charge! ) We went in the water for a bit and then sat and had a coffee while the sun came up properly and chatted about life in general... I wouldn't mind things progressing as oh my god he is gorgeous! Very much enjoyed him holding my hand to help me up and down from the rocks! I'm absolutely useless at this sort of thing though so no idea how to proceed. He does have a VERY busy life though so not sure it would even work.

 

[Thank(space)you]

I actually really enjoyed it! It definitely wasn't a date but there was a little mild flirtation going on, and he's asked me to do it again sometime (and no he didn't charge! ) We went in the water for a bit and then sat and had a coffee while the sun came up properly and chatted about life in general... I wouldn't mind things progressing as oh my god he is gorgeous! Very much enjoyed him holding my hand to help me up and down from the rocks! I'm absolutely useless at this sort of thing though so no idea how to proceed. He does have a VERY busy life though so not sure it would even work.

I'm glad you had a nice time and even if nothing comes from it, you've had fun, got to hang out with an attractive man and maybe even get a new hobby.