Dating after lockdown #26 What in the bad episode of Hollyoaks is going on?

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Men lead with their d**k. I hate that they think it’s ok to immediately chat sex which they’ve tried to disguise as something other bulls**t. It’s the same as the ‘no drama’ aka don’t have ANY issues because I will not support you.
 
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Gave me major ick ..he'd prefaced by saying he'd been messed about and wasn't prepared to risk that any more.
Absolutely nothing attractive about his 'list' but he clearly thinks he's the dogs bollox! Love that he clarifies that he wants sex, good sex ...no pressure there then! 🤨🙄🙄
Men who specify they want to have good sex are the type of men to finish within 30 seconds. They will then have the audacity to ask ‘did you c**?’, which must always be answered with: “yes to the wrong damn house, I’m leaving”
 
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Men have no chat.

Women are expected to have EVERYTHING going for them though including top tier personality. Make it make sense.
 
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Men lead with their d**k. I hate that they think it’s ok to immediately chat sex which they’ve tried to disguise as something other bulls**t. It’s the same as the ‘no drama’ aka don’t have ANY issues because I will not support you.
drama = women holding me accountable for crappy behaviour and expecting me to behave like an adult (which btw I refuse to do so i'm back on the apps after blaming and gaslighting them)
 
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drama = women holding me accountable for crappy behaviour and expecting me to behave like an adult (which btw I refuse to do so i'm back on the apps after blaming and gaslighting them)
100% this but I also think it goes even further. They say they want ‘simple’ but what they actually mean is they want to be lazy. Because good relationships are always simple - but that doesn’t mean they don’t take effort.

I’ve been digging into the psychology of modern dating for work purposes. One trend I’m seeing is the self empowerment movement is veering dangerously into not having community. Boundaries are vital, but the idea of the self has become so egocentric people are unlearning things like empathy and forgiveness.

And my theory, though unproven obviously, is that this feeds directly into the patriarchy, male entitlement and privilege. Which comes back to the ‘no drama’ or even just the declaration they have ‘no baggage’. Everyone has baggage, it’s life. Declaring it like that just makes me think you’re a cold person Nigel that walks away without ever reflecting on the impact you have.
 
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This is the kind of chat that tickles my pickle (my job title is Mary Poppins because I work with kids)
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The guy chat seems to be quieter and I'm getting the feeling off the phasing out. Maybe I'm wrong but I'm never wrong lol
I'm meeting him tomz for lunch so will see if that happens
 
Men who specify they want to have good sex are the type of men to finish within 30 seconds. They will then have the audacity to ask ‘did you c**?’, which must always be answered with: “yes to the wrong damn house, I’m leaving”
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2023 appears to be the year of the cut and paste too.....I don't need a long list of what they are looking for all flowered up with what they think are pretty words when it can be easily said in one word 'sex!' Goodness knows how many women are subjected to that nonsense!
Lol so he wants sex and to not make any plans. Cool 👍🏽 sounds great. Also guys who use the word ‘giggle’ = immediate ick.
 
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100% this but I also think it goes even further. They say they want ‘simple’ but what they actually mean is they want to be lazy. Because good relationships are always simple - but that doesn’t mean they don’t take effort.

I’ve been digging into the psychology of modern dating for work purposes. One trend I’m seeing is the self empowerment movement is veering dangerously into not having community. Boundaries are vital, but the idea of the self has become so egocentric people are unlearning things like empathy and forgiveness.

And my theory, though unproven obviously, is that this feeds directly into the patriarchy, male entitlement and privilege. Which comes back to the ‘no drama’ or even just the declaration they have ‘no baggage’. Everyone has baggage, it’s life. Declaring it like that just makes me think you’re a cold person Nigel that walks away without ever reflecting on the impact you have.
It’s also the same as ‘looks after themselves’ or crap along the line of ‘someone to enjoy the gym with’ these been mustn’t gain any weight If not please look like a plastic doll with big boobs, tiny waist and big bum.
 
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The guy basically ignored me all day. He normally sends me voice notes calls me but struggled to get a conversation out off him. He been online and left me on read which he never done.
I dont think ill bother driving to London to see him for lunch.
Why are men like this!
I haven't change In the way we talk etc
I did asks him if everything was okay as I notice how distance he had been and I also noticed he turned off comments on his new pics he uploads to ig🤷‍♀️
 
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The guy basically ignored me all day. He normally sends me voice notes calls me but struggled to get a conversation out off him. He been online and left me on read which he never done.
I dont think ill bother driving to London to see him for lunch.
Why are men like this!
I haven't change In the way we talk etc
I did asks him if everything was okay as I notice how distance he had been and I also noticed he turned off comments on his new pics he uploads to ig🤷‍♀️
It's going to be really hard to do but it's super important that you don't reach out to him again.

You've asked him once, no need to ask again or chase him. If he wanted to reply he would - especially as you have upcoming plans.
 
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It's going to be really hard to do but it's super important that you don't reach out to him again.

You've asked him once, no need to ask again or chase him. If he wanted to reply he would - especially as you have upcoming plans.
Nah I definitely won't asks him again and yea plans tomorrow we'll today now and Friday I was going his and spending the day in London Saturday but he gone completely cold.
The only message he sent me was a love heart emoji 🙄 when I said have fun at football and he hasn't replied since 2000.
He always calls me on way their and back since we started chatting in December.

He was also online on ig like 8 mins ago so he choosing not to reply to me so I can't be arsed with these games
 
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Nah I definitely won't asks him again and yea plans tomorrow we'll today now and Friday I was going his and spending the day in London Saturday but he gone completely cold.
The only message he sent me was a love heart emoji 🙄 when I said have fun at football and he hasn't replied since 2000.
He always calls me on way their and back since we started chatting in December.

He was also online on ig like 8 mins ago so he choosing not to reply to me so I can't be arsed with these games
I don’t get why he’s been like this.. so so weird. It drives me mad when this happens cos how can they go from wanting to go on dates with you and suddenly he’s gone cold. Do yourself a favour and delete the convo and his number.
 
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Nah I definitely won't asks him again and yea plans tomorrow we'll today now and Friday I was going his and spending the day in London Saturday but he gone completely cold.
The only message he sent me was a love heart emoji 🙄 when I said have fun at football and he hasn't replied since 2000.
He always calls me on way their and back since we started chatting in December.

He was also online on ig like 8 mins ago so he choosing not to reply to me so I can't be arsed with these games
Its honestly the worst when this happens because even though you try not to, it’s human nature to start questioning yourself - “did I do something”, “what changed”, “what’s wrong with me” & even the soundest of people would ask these questions when they switch so dramatically. I really don’t have any answers for that but it’s definitely a them problem. I genuinely find it incredible how men (I say men as it seems to be them that do it more often) can literally do a complete 180 over night.
As the others have said, don’t message again. You’re worth better than this & you deserve someone that won’t switch up on you. I know none of that helps whilst you’re going through it xx
 
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Its honestly the worst when this happens because even though you try not to, it’s human nature to start questioning yourself - “did I do something”, “what changed”, “what’s wrong with me” & even the soundest of people would ask these questions when they switch so dramatically. I really don’t have any answers for that but it’s definitely a them problem. I genuinely find it incredible how men (I say men as it seems to be them that do it more often) can literally do a complete 180 over night.
As the others have said, don’t message again. You’re worth better than this & you deserve someone that won’t switch up on you. I know none of that helps whilst you’re going through it xx
I know I've done nothing this time and he was online on ig till like 4am and I haven't heard from him since 8pm
I archive his chat but he normally called me on his way to work but hasn't and no messages this morning.
If he said we had a good time but I don't feel like this can continue but he literally phasing me out when in reality I don't actually care.
Its annoying as I was liking him and he was dead set on the day out in London together etc etc
Will see how today goes
 
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I know I've done nothing this time and he was online on ig till like 4am and I haven't heard from him since 8pm
I archive his chat but he normally called me on his way to work but hasn't and no messages this morning.
If he said we had a good time but I don't feel like this can continue but he literally phasing me out when in reality I don't actually care.
Its annoying as I was liking him and he was dead set on the day out in London together etc etc
Will see how today goes
I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's the absolute worst, but stay strong and don't initiate contact with him. It's so frustrating though. They always seem to do it when we let our guard down a little and decide we're going to give it a go! They're fuckwits and it's no reflection of you at all.

Hugs xx
 
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I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's the absolute worst, but stay strong and don't initiate contact with him. It's so frustrating though. They always seem to do it when we let our guard down a little and decide we're going to give it a go! They're fuckwits and it's no reflection of you at all.

Hugs xx
Mate he was tit in bed but was giving him the benefit as he was actually nice 😅


Edit- he text me saying 'listen I'm quite stressed out atm, plus my back gone so that's stressed me out more. Give me some space and I'll call you tonight

I'm sorry.
 
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