Dating after lockdown #26 What in the bad episode of Hollyoaks is going on?

[LaBlonde]

on we go ladies! sending lots of love to the last thread (and to @Jadejones9596 at the end there) - some men around who don’t even deserve the luxury of being thrown in the bin tbh.

anyway just remember:

winning title from the fabulous @Clementine and originally nominated by mozz however apologies if i counted wrong as there were some multiple posts and maths is NOT my strong point.

as you were you wonderful people

 

[Jadejones9596]

I do think his reason was genuine. He said he had a terrible day at work and asked to reschedule to next Friday. He text me this morning and it sounds awful, his job is at risk and it all blew up a bit. He’s been quite quiet and not really answering me too much but I think he’s just really not feeling great mentally. He said sorry again today and said sorry we’ve had to rearrange to next week, it does seem like he still wants to do it but my mind is just telling me it’s too good to be true and this is the start of the slow fade xx

 

[sofipbn]

I do think his reason was genuine. He said he had a terrible day at work and asked to reschedule to next Friday. He text me this morning and it sounds awful, his job is at risk and it all blew up a bit. He’s been quite quiet and not really answering me too much but I think he’s just really not feeling great mentally. He said sorry again today and said sorry we’ve had to rearrange to next week, it does seem like he still wants to do it but my mind is just telling me it’s too good to be true and this is the start of the slow fade xx

Seems like he has a lot to handle right now. I'd give him some space and wait and see. But keep going with your life, don't wait for him!

 

[queenbees]

So my date for the night has cancelled on bowling and dinner. Instead he wants to come round to my house and cook me dinner but then proceeded to tell me that I need to go to Tesco and buy the food so basically, he’s a scab and doesn’t want to have to pay for bowling and dinner apparently “it’s only fair you buy if I’m cooking”

 

[sofipbn]

So my date for the night has cancelled on bowling and dinner. Instead he wants to come round to my house and cook me dinner but then proceeded to tell me that I need to go to Tesco and buy the food so basically, he’s a scab and doesn’t want to have to pay for bowling and dinner apparently “it’s only fair you buy if I’m cooking”

...... seriously???

 

[queenbees]

...... seriously???

I swear to almighty god

He has now told me “if you just wanna get a takeaway I’ll pay for that” after I replied “scabby”

 

[D2them]

I swear to almighty god

He has now told me “if you just wanna get a takeaway I’ll pay for that” after I replied “scabby”

Unreal. They never cease to astound me. What you gonna do??

 

[Fledgling Psycho]

I know I always say this but I get sick of reading about these losers! Such a waste of time and energy. Sorry things seem so grim for so many right now. Yet in my family all I hear is of so & so and their partner/girlfriend/boyfriend. It's a mystery.

I know I always say this but I get sick of reading about these losers! Such a waste of time and energy. Sorry things seem so grim for so many right now. Yet in my family all I hear is of so & so and their partner/girlfriend/boyfriend. It's a mystery.

Queenbees that bloke sounds a complete scrote.

Sorry for re quote

 

[queenbees]

Unreal. They never cease to astound me. What you gonna do??

I actually just wrote back to him being like “what is actually wrong with men nowadays, there’s not one gentlemanly bone in their bodies”

And he said “I think cooking for a lady is very gentleman like”

To which I replied “yes until you told me to go to Tesco and get the food because your cooking I have to buy the food” this is a first date ladies lol

I told him to leave it off

 

[D2them]

I actually just wrote back to him being like “what is actually wrong with men nowadays, there’s not one gentlemanly bone in their bodies”

And he said “I think cooking for a lady is very gentleman like”

To which I replied “yes until you told me to go to Tesco and get the food because your cooking I have to buy the food” this is a first date ladies lol

I told him to leave it off

Good girl. We shouldn't tolerate this tit. If they can't do the bare minimum they can get in the bin.

NEXT!!

 

[Clementine]

Awww. I’m chuffed at the thread title. You guys are great Quite ironic when the thought of dating just seems such an effort, and given what is being offered it’s really not an effort I want to make. A pure chocolate chunky kitKat however! @it’s not been changed?!

 

[queenbees]

So he has now said “What are you on about. I am making an effort. I told you I’d come down to you and cook for you. That’s an effort “

like these men are clueless.
My reply was “yes it would have been an effort and a good first impression if you showed up at my house with a bag of food and a bottle of wine and cooked for me but you then proceeded to tell me to get off my ass and go to Tesco to get the food. And it was only fair that I buy it if you’re cooking it.”

the original plan was bowling and dinner and it’s quite clear now why he didn’t want to do that which is fine. But like seriously.

EDIT: he has now replied “I was only messing about getting the food” - lies. He’s only saying that now because I’ve called him out on this crappy behaviour

 

[nothanksbabes]

The bleeping audacity of these men. People keep telling me to get my ex off his pedestal but I think I paid for dinner two or three times in our entire relationship, not for want of trying.

Bad day today. My plans have cancelled and up until five minutes ago Saturday was the day my ex would have walked through the door an hour earlier than I expected shouting, "Sorry I'm early, I just got too excited to see you! Look how beautiful you are!" and we'd have gone and had a nice day out, gone for dinner and just laughed for the entire weekend. Or we'd go to a gig and he'd say how proud he was to be seen with me, and how lucky he was to have such a clever, attractive, funny girlfriend.

Now I get to sit on my own with my cats while he replaces me with a woman he didn't like the first time round coz he's a bleeping coward who can't stand up to his crappy aggro family, and I fend off the advances of fuckboys who expect me to deliver myself to their doorstep wrapped in a bow for some mediocre sex like they're doing me a favour. Joy. I'd rather tit in my hands and clap.

Solo hobbies are hard at the moment. Everything feels bleeping bleak generally and everything I had to look forward is gone. We move in a relatively small scene (where sadly, 95% of the men are trolls and underachievers) of gigs and festivals so my plans still exist, just with the humiliation of seeing him with her. The last decade of my life has been a tit sandwich and I wish I could just lay down and will myself out of existence.

 

[xcyber]

So my date for the night has cancelled on bowling and dinner. Instead he wants to come round to my house and cook me dinner but then proceeded to tell me that I need to go to Tesco and buy the food so basically, he’s a scab and doesn’t want to have to pay for bowling and dinner apparently “it’s only fair you buy if I’m cooking”

Erm lol. What a fuckwit. Hard pass.

 

[wibblywobblywoo]

So he has now said “What are you on about. I am making an effort. I told you I’d come down to you and cook for you. That’s an effort “

like these men are clueless.
My reply was “yes it would have been an effort and a good first impression if you showed up at my house with a bag of food and a bottle of wine and cooked for me but you then proceeded to tell me to get off my ass and go to Tesco to get the food. And it was only fair that I buy it if you’re cooking it.”

the original plan was bowling and dinner and it’s quite clear now why he didn’t want to do that which is fine. But like seriously.

EDIT: he has now replied “I was only messing about getting the food” - lies. He’s only saying that now because I’ve called him out on this crappy behaviour

You do realise these men use this as a code for sex ? They invite themselves over under the guise of coming to cook you dinner or to have a coffee... it's concerning to me that your first reaction was that he's being tight rather than the fact you don't invite strangers into your safe space that you've met on a dating site. You don't know this man and keeping yourself safe should always be your first thought.

 

[xcyber]

You do realise these men use this as a code for sex ? They invite themselves over under the guise of coming to cook you dinner or to have a coffee... it's concerning to me that your first reaction was that he's being tight rather than the fact you don't invite strangers into your safe space that you've met on a dating site. You don't know this man and keeping yourself safe should always be your first thought.

He could have easily suggested going back to hers after bowling too. These guys are always going to try it but you’d think they’d try to make more of an effort first!

 

[wibblywobblywoo]

He could have easily suggested going back to hers after bowling too. These guys are always going to try it but you’d think they’d try to make more of an effort first!

Well she would have met him in person in that case and made a judgement call about her safety...him arriving at her home as a stranger without having met him prior to that is never ever a good idea with a man you've only spoken to/ off the internet!

 

[xcyber]

Well she would have met him in person in that case and made a judgement call about her safety...him arriving at her home as a stranger without having met him prior to that is never ever a good idea with a man you've only spoken to/ off the internet!

In fairness I don’t think she has any intention of having him over… unless I’m wrong. I mean I’m totally in agreement with you, I would never have a guy over who I’ve never met. In fact when I bought my new flat I refused to have any guy over in case they tainted the memories of my own beautiful home lol.

 

[LaBlonde]

In fairness I don’t think she has any intention of having him over… unless I’m wrong. I mean I’m totally in agreement with you, I would never have a guy over who I’ve never met. In fact when I bought my new flat I refused to have any guy over in case they tainted the memories of my own beautiful home lol.

omg same bought and decorated my house and i love it so much and it’s so pretty that the thought of some man stomping around here, being all manlike, actually turns my stomach.

 

[wibblywobblywoo]

That's exactly my point...it's our safe place where we are happy.