Dating after lockdown #21 More red flags than Pamplona, we don’t wanna know about your boner.

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Thank you ! I’m on the train to Manc now and super excited 😃😃😃 I just hope he’s just as lovely in person and we have a fun day and night x

Thank you ! I’m on the train to Manc now and super excited 😃😃😃 I just hope he’s just as lovely in person and we have a fun day and night x
 
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Thank you ! I’m on the train to Manc now and super excited 😃😃😃 I just hope he’s just as lovely in person and we have a fun day and night x

Thank you ! I’m on the train to Manc now and super excited 😃😃😃 I just hope he’s just as lovely in person and we have a fun day and night x
Have a lovely time, cant wait for an update. 🤞
 
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Thank you ! I’m on the train to Manc now and super excited 😃😃😃 I just hope he’s just as lovely in person and we have a fun day and night x

Thank you ! I’m on the train to Manc now and super excited 😃😃😃 I just hope he’s just as lovely in person and we have a fun day and night x
Enjoy hope you have amazing time x
 
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My mate suggested I send a ' Hey' message as we haven't spoken since that message.

Least I know where I stand and I won't be wondering was he just in a bad mood
Screenshot_20220611-161017_WhatsApp.jpg
 
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Wow who the hell does he think he is. I’m fuming. Delete his number and block this disgusting person
Yeah makes me wonder if he with someone else over the weekend as there no valid reason not to speak to me since Thursday or its a control thing.
 
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Folks, I’ve been dipping my toes back in dating waters after spending two years of pandemic isolation with my pensioner parents! I’m a bit too comfortable with my own company and getting very selfish with my time. This is important context!!!

A man matched me on hinge last Sunday. He told me during the week that he cancelled a date he had with another girl on Monday. We are due to meet tomorrow. He’s…intense. Heart on sleeve. We haven’t even met and he’s convinced I’m his perfect woman. I’m very wary of love bombing. Too many experiences of men who are all excited for a week and then suddenly they’re ghosting me. I also have commitment issues so maybe I subconsciously seek them out?!

anyway, he’s working today but keeps alluding to something he might do after work if he has the energy. I am very very concerned he’s planning on coming to see me. He lives half an hour away.

is it romantic for someone to do this? Am I selfish for being horrified at the notion of him landing on my doorstep uninvited and unplanned? He’s never asked if I have plans. And I hate hate hate unexpected visitors!
I took advice and told him I had plans tonight. He just sent me his location and he is 1km away with some chocolate for me. He is being very cute about it all and I am now quite sad that he’s confirmed all my suspicions and now I can’t meet him because he’s clearly batshit.
 
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I took advice and told him I had plans tonight. He just sent me his location and he is 1km away with some chocolate for me. He is being very cute about it all and I am now quite sad that he’s confirmed all my suspicions and now I can’t meet him because he’s clearly batshit.
Oh lord, that is a classic narc move. Big build up, grand gesture, acts like the milk tray man. No doubt he’ll try and make you feel guilty that you won’t see him despite the fact you told him you had plans, and he only had to wait until tomorrow.

This guy clearly can’t keep a lid on his crazy. If you do decide to meet him please be careful - public place, lots of people around, someone knows where you are and gives you a ring to check you’re ok during the date, you let them know you’re home safe and sound afterwards x
 
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Oh lord, that is a classic narc move. Big build up, grand gesture, acts like the milk tray man. No doubt he’ll try and make you feel guilty that you won’t see him despite the fact you told him you had plans, and he only had to wait until tomorrow.

This guy clearly can’t keep a lid on his crazy. If you do decide to meet him please be careful - public place, lots of people around, someone knows where you are and gives you a ring to check you’re ok during the date, you let them know you’re home safe and sound afterwards x
Ah thank you but there’s no way I’m meeting him now. I fabricated plans tonight just to try and save him from shooting him self in the foot but still he couldn’t resist. Such a shame. He was tall dark and handsome! But there are only so many warning bells I can ignore before I go deaf.

im very grateful for the community of lovely ladies here that are so generous with sharing their experience and best advice x
 
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I took advice and told him I had plans tonight. He just sent me his location and he is 1km away with some chocolate for me. He is being very cute about it all and I am now quite sad that he’s confirmed all my suspicions and now I can’t meet him because he’s clearly batshit.
I feel like I’m being really negative now but this gives me real creepy vibes

Yeah makes me wonder if he with someone else over the weekend as there no valid reason not to speak to me since Thursday or its a control thing.
It’s really unacceptable behaviour. This behaviour will only get worse in time.
 
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Ah thank you but there’s no way I’m meeting him now. I fabricated plans tonight just to try and save him from shooting him self in the foot but still he couldn’t resist. Such a shame. He was tall dark and handsome! But there are only so many warning bells I can ignore before I go deaf.

im very grateful for the community of lovely ladies here that are so generous with sharing their experience and best advice x
I’m relieved. I hope he doesn’t flip his lid when you tell him!
 
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I took advice and told him I had plans tonight. He just sent me his location and he is 1km away with some chocolate for me. He is being very cute about it all and I am now quite sad that he’s confirmed all my suspicions and now I can’t meet him because he’s clearly batshit.
im just baffled by how this guy thinks this is okay? Even if you’d had been on a couple of dates I’d still think it was a bit much early on. Totally agree it’s classics narc behaviour after learning myself from being with one previously!
it’s still just baffles me there are people out there that behave this way & then the other person on the other end feels like they have to tread carefully to get themselves out of an uncomfortable situation they didn’t ask/expect to be put in!

and then that other guy speaking to @Losa53 like that…what on earth?!
Please block both of these men ladies. Huge red flags & you both deserve a million times better xx
 
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It’s hilarious how men seem to sit at either end of the extreme. They’re so avoidant as to make us anxious needy wrecks, or they overwhelm us with attention with an initial but short lived obsession.

i might just retire from dating a few years and wait til all the divorcees hit the market 😅
 
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@Losa53 and @Carapop Block block block and run! Both of these guys sound horrible, I can hardly believe it! You deserve so much better. Really, why men…
His behaviour towards me has upset me a lil and I shouldn't let it get to me as im better than that but I don't get why anyone would speak to someone like that especially if you wanted to be in a relationship with them. Just no regards how this made me feel

Next!!!! Lol
 
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Ah thank you but there’s no way I’m meeting him now. I fabricated plans tonight just to try and save him from shooting him self in the foot but still he couldn’t resist. Such a shame. He was tall dark and handsome! But there are only so many warning bells I can ignore before I go deaf.

im very grateful for the community of lovely ladies here that are so generous with sharing their experience and best advice x
He’d obviously given some hint that he was creepy enough to do this. At least you already know. And know that you can trust your instincts!

I’m so paranoid I wouldn’t even take something edible from someone I’d not met so I know I can be ott with this stuff anyway, but the chocolates made this even worse for me!

His behaviour towards me has upset me a lil and I shouldn't let it get to me as im better than that but I don't get why anyone would speak to someone like that especially if you wanted to be in a relationship with them. Just no regards how this made me feel

Next!!!! Lol
I think this is firmly in the don’t take it personally. Not as in don’t be hurt or offended. Rather, he’s clearly a dick. Twice now he’s told you how to behave both over the ? And now that you can’t expect a conversation til he seems it time. Ridiculous behaviour. But it’s totally on him and nothing to do with you. Would I have chased? Probably not. Did it warrant a patronising and aggressive message? Definitely not. You don’t need this kind of energy in your life.
 
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He’d obviously given some hint that he was creepy enough to do this. At least you already know. And know that you can trust your instincts!

I’m so paranoid I wouldn’t even take something edible from someone I’d not met so I know I can be ott with this stuff anyway, but the chocolates made this even worse for me!



I think this is firmly in the don’t take it personally. Not as in don’t be hurt or offended. Rather, he’s clearly a dick. Twice now he’s told you how to behave both over the ? And now that you can’t expect a conversation til he seems it time. Ridiculous behaviour. But it’s totally on him and nothing to do with you. Would I have chased? Probably not. Did it warrant a patronising and aggressive message? Definitely not. You don’t need this kind of energy in your life.
Yea I wasn't gonna message him but my mate said see how he his as surely he kidding about I'm not allowed to message him till next week.
I just couldn't see him talking to other women like this.
He quite posh and well together like suited and booted and I'm more gym wear converse girl even though I have a career and a professional he makes me feel like I'm below him
 
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Yea I wasn't gonna message him but my mate said see how he his as surely he kidding about I'm not allowed to message him till next week.
I just couldn't see him talking to other women like this.
He quite posh and well together like suited and booted and I'm more gym wear converse girl even though I have a career and a professional he makes me feel like I'm below him
He can’t make you feel like that if you don’t allow him. Suited and booted is just smoke and mirrors. It’s the inside that counts, someone’s character and integrity. He is treating you like you’re not worth his time, how very dare he. Block and delete now. When he comes crawling back he’ll learn that his dire disrespectful behaviour isn’t rewarded with your attention. If you don’t respect you , no one will. Don’t chase any man. You’ll exhaust yourself snd they’ll allow it. Tomorrow is a brand new week and fresh start. Block and delete and remove temptation. I’m always so tempted by the unavailable too! X
 
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