Dating after lockdown #15 new year, new dates

[TillyMiffin]

Oh my god, I need to go and check this out. . I’ll catch up with you all later


So long as you definitely mean that and aren’t gonna get hurt. I always fall in love when the good sex hormones kick in so be careful.
This is an interesting one, I’ve had a ‘FWB’ situation a while back, met him out, through mutual friends. Has a laugh but he made it clear he didn’t want a relationship or to date, we ended up having a purely sexual thing (at my suggestion) and I can say although I enjoyed his company, fancied him, had great sex, (he was packing ladies ) I honestly didn’t catch feelings. He never stayed over but he would stay for a couple of hours chatting and laughing about stuff. In the bed he stood me he was going to meet up with an ex, so it stopped. We are now friends, text each other every week or so, have a drink together if I see him out.
it filled a need at the as I was missing sex but didn’t want a boyfriend or emotional attachment. I’d definitely do it again if I were in a s

It's definitely all lust on my side. We are
from very different worlds so I'm not sure it would work out for us.
I feel in control though and I know if things fizzled out tomorrow I would be fine and we would probably end up being good friends

This is an interesting one, I’ve had a ‘FWB’ situation a while back, met him out, through mutual friends. Has a laugh but he made it clear he didn’t want a relationship or to date, we ended up having a purely sexual thing (at my suggestion) and I can say although I enjoyed his company, fancied him, had great sex, (he was packing ladies ) I honestly didn’t catch feelings. He never stayed over but he would stay for a couple of hours chatting and laughing about stuff. In the bed he stood me he was going to meet up with an ex, so it stopped. We are now friends, text each other every week or so, have a drink together if I see him out.
it filled a need at the as I was missing sex but didn’t want a boyfriend or emotional attachment. I’d definitely do it again if I were in a similar situation x

 

[StrawberryCream]

I actually miss some of Laurie's no nonsense replies!

She’s still on tattle her name is candyland now. (Just seen this has been said)
Mulholland was on here last week as a french les, the name was iMissDi, they were on the chit chat thread and a few others

 

[NoseyNiamh]

This is an interesting one, I’ve had a ‘FWB’ situation a while back, met him out, through mutual friends. Has a laugh but he made it clear he didn’t want a relationship or to date, we ended up having a purely sexual thing (at my suggestion) and I can say although I enjoyed his company, fancied him, had great sex, (he was packing ladies ) I honestly didn’t catch feelings. He never stayed over but he would stay for a couple of hours chatting and laughing about stuff. In the bed he stood me he was going to meet up with an ex, so it stopped. We are now friends, text each other every week or so, have a drink together if I see him out.
it filled a need at the as I was missing sex but didn’t want a boyfriend or emotional attachment. I’d definitely do it again if I were in a similar situation x

Thanks for this, it's exactly what I have at the minute. I honestly can't see me developing any feelings for him. It's just stress free fun. I don't think about him throughout the day until he messages me and he is consistent with making plans and stuff. I think I finally found something that works for me
Thank you to everyone that replied, its great to have a quick chat about things to you all.

 

[TillyMiffin]

Thanks for this, it's exactly what I have at the minute. I honestly can't see me developing any feelings for him. It's just stress free fun. I don't think about him throughout the day until he messages me and he is consistent with making plans and stuff. I think I finally found something that works for me
Thank you to everyone that replied, its great to have a quick chat about things to you all.

Yeah that’s how I felt, I kept having to check my internal feelings if that makes sense to see if I was REALLY ok with it, but I think the clincher was I didn’t think about him in between meet ups, I didn’t find myself wanting to message him etc. so I was free to enjoy it for what I’d actually was. Having said all this, in my 30’s I had a FWB fling with someone I knew had a girlfriend, (I know, awful!) fell madly in love with him, had the best sex ever with him, and when he finished it after 4 months I was devastated!

 

[Dollenganger]

Can I just ask, what do you all think about someone who suggests going for a walk for a first date?

 

[Raymond Luxury-Yacht]

Can I just ask, what do you all think about someone who suggests going for a walk for a first date?

Is it not too cold where you are? I usually prefer going for a coffee or something.

 

[Dollenganger]

Is it not too cold where you are? I usually prefer going for a coffee or something.

It is cold, yes and my nose runs in the cold. Which isn’t a good look.

 

[LaBlonde]

Can I just ask, what do you all think about someone who suggests going for a walk for a first date?

i’m not very outdoorsy so it wouldn’t be my first choice plus i would much rather sit down and face someone to chat. however i’m not overly against it, provided it’s literally just a walk - i’ve had a few friends end up on surprise hikes!

 

[Raymond Luxury-Yacht]

It is cold, yes and my nose runs in the cold. Which isn’t a good look.

Oh mine does too Can you just say it’s cold for a walk now, choose something else and go for a walk when it gets warmer? Makes no sense freezing your bum off

 

[Emsie]

Can I just ask, what do you all think about someone who suggests going for a walk for a first date?

No comment, but I love your user name! Flowers in the attic reference?

 

[BunnyLebowski]

Can I just ask, what do you all think about someone who suggests going for a walk for a first date?

We’ve had this debate here before and most people think it’s a crap idea. UNLESS you have dogs and get a cup of tea on the way. So up to you sweetheart. If you have dogs go for it, if not, it’s weird as in can’t he buy you a coffee and look you in the eye over a table.

 

[Dollenganger]

I should clarify that I find dating to be very difficult and I get treated badly easily. I’m autistic, you see so I miss clear signs of what the other person is aiming to do. I am generally considered to be good looking. But people can sometimes think that I’m a bit strange (which I am tbf).

What makes me angry is the entitled attitude that men have so they think they can just use me for sex because they are not so keen on my quirky personality.

I have almost given up on finding someone due to the string of car crash relationships that I’ve had. The only good one was when I was married to an autistic guy and we have two children together and that was an equal relationship. Sadly, we split up because of communication problems which is all too common when both people are autistic (and even when one is)

 

[Delihla]

Can I just ask, what do you all think about someone who suggests going for a walk for a first date?

It’s not my idea of a date lovely, but I know there’s posters here who would be cool with it. I’m guessing since you’re asking you’re maybe not one of them though.

 

[Dollenganger]

No comment, but I love your user name! Flowers in the attic reference?

Yes! Flowers in the Attic! I love that book

We’ve had this debate here before and most people think it’s a crap idea. UNLESS you have dogs and get a cup of tea on the way. So up to you sweetheart. If you have dogs go for it, if not, it’s weird as in can’t he buy you a coffee and look you in the eye over a table.

I just get the feeling that it shows he’s not interested enough in me to go on a proper date. Maybe he’d be ashamed to be seen with me in a dating context?

or maybe I’m overthinking it

 

[Raymond Luxury-Yacht]

I just get the feeling that it shows he’s not interested enough in me to go on a proper date. Maybe he’d be ashamed to be seen with me in a dating context?

What exactly did he say?

 

[Dollenganger]

What exactly did he say?

Well, first of all he asked me to come to his house and I said no absolutely not. I said why don’t we go for a coffee or a few drinks. He said ok. Then the next day he said, can we go for a walk? All the time he is texting me and asking for photos. He hasn’t asked me one question about myself and what I do (I’ve asked him about himself).

 

[Wowitsme]

Good times! She hated kids and I can’t remember anything else. Think I quite liked her at one point

The hatred for kids was unreal men with kids especially

 

[NoseyNiamh]

Well, first of all he asked me to come to his house and I said no absolutely not. I said why don’t we go for a coffee or a few drinks. He said ok. Then the next day he said, can we go for a walk? All the time he is texting me and asking for photos. He hasn’t asked me one question about myself and what I do (I’ve asked him about himself).

Please avoid this guy at all costs. I have a bad feeling about him straight away.
It sounds like he can't even be bothered to buy a cup of coffee.

 

[Raymond Luxury-Yacht]

Well, first of all he asked me to come to his house and I said no absolutely not. I said why don’t we go for a coffee or a few drinks. He said ok. Then the next day he said, can we go for a walk? All the time he is texting me and asking for photos. He hasn’t asked me one question about myself and what I do (I’ve asked him about himself).

Oh well that’s a tough one. If I were you, I’d insist on a date in some public place. It seems like he wants to have sex ASAP.

 

[radoxdetox]

Well, first of all he asked me to come to his house and I said no absolutely not. I said why don’t we go for a coffee or a few drinks. He said ok. Then the next day he said, can we go for a walk? All the time he is texting me and asking for photos. He hasn’t asked me one question about myself and what I do (I’ve asked him about himself).

This is a red flag for me, but I had so many convos like this recently, it’s like CoVid has rendered men all Neanderthals