All the Instamums who peaked around 2016 are going to be entering their divorce and perimenopause eras now.
Clemmie Telford #5 There once was an a-hole from Peckham who likes to buy houses and wreck’em
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Insufferable wankers, the lot of them.
She’s so bloody disorganised I wouldn’t be surprised if she’d just forgotten her password and locked herself out of her account.
Hmmmm. Definitely sounds like something has gone on to force this change in her…Perhaps to do with her husband
Yeah could be. Or the sheer stress of trying so hard to be a home influencer, over stretching the finances and dying on her arse at the same time. It was a chaotic, diabolical thing to witness. Maybe she’s just quit. I’d say “whilst she’s ahead” but I’d be lying.
Perhaps she has got to get a full time proper job to pay the mortgage/heat the house of horrors and won't have time to dick about doing half arsed ads.
I think it’s most likely this but pigs will fly before she says it’s because no-one was in the least bit interested in her online musings or her cringey podcasts.
Right *rubs hands together* - who do we think will quit next? I'm going for Alison Perry.
That’s what I thought but sure her family slush found would keep paying her
So she's re-launching herself. But only on Facebook. With a closed group.
I'm no social media strategist, but WTF?!
I'm no social media strategist, but WTF?!
Is this a joke? We’re meant to want to read an article on #healthierliving “life hacks” illustrated by a photo of the author looking like a homeless person who just woke up on a beach with a cider hangover after a night of rough sleeping?
Me to husband: would you take healthy living tips from this person?
Husband: stares in horror at phone - Bloody hell no! Who is that? It looks like a vulnerable person. Are they at risk? Is it a patient or something?
Honestly - just give it up! Do instagram if you must as a hobby or for comedy value for the rest of us but get a proper job. And not in marketing as you’re bloody awful at it. Also - stop encouraging vulnerable people to share what are essentially medical histories and stories of trauma with you to monetise. It’s totally unethical and can cause actual harm as you are not trained, indemnified or registered to interact with the public in this way and can’t help or support them with the resultant issues that this can cause
Me to husband: would you take healthy living tips from this person?
Husband: stares in horror at phone - Bloody hell no! Who is that? It looks like a vulnerable person. Are they at risk? Is it a patient or something?
Honestly - just give it up! Do instagram if you must as a hobby or for comedy value for the rest of us but get a proper job. And not in marketing as you’re bloody awful at it. Also - stop encouraging vulnerable people to share what are essentially medical histories and stories of trauma with you to monetise. It’s totally unethical and can cause actual harm as you are not trained, indemnified or registered to interact with the public in this way and can’t help or support them with the resultant issues that this can cause
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Can you imagine what life hacks (hate the phrase) you’d get from Clemmie?! She can’t even manage an Insta account!
That really is laughable. She looks like she’s just been busted cooking up meth on the beach.
Clemmie’s life hacks:
1. don’t sell your intellectual property right for magic beans
2. Don’t buy a haunted mansion
3. When out and about, don’t leave diamonds in an unlocked car
4. If you have issues with SPAG despite your parents having paid for an education for you, make sure to run your text through Grammarly before posting it on the internet.
5. Dirty knickers belong in the washing basket, not on your grid.
1. don’t sell your intellectual property right for magic beans
2. Don’t buy a haunted mansion
3. When out and about, don’t leave diamonds in an unlocked car
4. If you have issues with SPAG despite your parents having paid for an education for you, make sure to run your text through Grammarly before posting it on the internet.
5. Dirty knickers belong in the washing basket, not on your grid.
6. Allow your pants to pile up on the bathroom floor then you can use them for the odd wipe round of the shower.
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7. A great way to recover from bankruptcy is to take your family to Thailand for a month.
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7. A great way to recover from bankruptcy is to take your family to Thailand for a month.
OMG, I am honestly having one of the worst days of my life but that made me chuckle.
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8) Stuck for interior design inspo? Take inspiration from your local, run down half way house or look into the decor and design of Josef Fritzl.
9) want to have a classy, pregnancy photo shoot? Just sit naked on the loo in your dirty bathroom and get your photographer mate to come and snap you looking like you are struggling to do a giant tit.
I think she had in the past tried a private club or something that was with a fee. Omg the name was hilarious (it failed of course). Who can remember?
It was something like "the really cool club" or similar ?
